So, yesterday,
rapper J'Rule...
Ja Rule...
I act like I don't know. I know what's up.
I know what's happening.
He's on my iPod. Um...
I know what's going on. He's on my iPod Shuffle.
So, he posted an ad asking people to let him, uh,
help do their taxes,
even though he owes the IRS $2 million.
My guy, MC Hammer, says this is a bad idea.
Uh, what do you guys think of this?
This is the ad. It's a little busy, first of all, for an ad.
I don't like when too much shit's going on.
Does he not know about the Fyre Festival documentaries?
(laughs) Does he not know
that he was sort of implicated in being a huge scammer?
-Yeah. -Yeah. This man cannot organize a piss-up in a brewery.
Like, I'm not letting him anywhere the (bleep) near...
Right. I'm not doing a piss-up with him.
-I'm not doing a festival. -He's never even managed
to cure his sore throat. No.
I don't know. I don't know...
-(applause) -There you go.
I-I love Ja Rule
-but just not with my money. -Right.
Wait, what's a piss-up?
A piss-up is, uh-- Yeah, that is a very English thing.
-I piss down. Yeah. -Yeah. (laughs)
Is that when everybody gets together and pees together?
-And you piss up? -Everyone gets together and they drink alcohol
-together. -Oh, you don't piss up?
-No. -But you all pee together, too?
Or you just-- You're getting together to drink beer?
Oh, no. We always pee together, but... (laughs)
-SPADE: I've never been over there. -That's just general.
-That's just England. -SPADE: Uh... -I would--
-I'd hire him. I'd hire him. -Oh, okay.
And I'll tell you. But, at the same time,
I hired Billy Bob Thornton as my marriage counselor
and David Spade as my acting coach, so I feel like...
-Don't drag me into it. -FEIMSTER: (laughs) Yeah.
You know, I'm cutting that part out. I'm cutting it out.
So, this is--
First of all, Value Tax.
First of all, it's a bit loan sharky,
because they-they say they're gonna help you
-but they will also advance you your refund early -FEIMSTER: Mm.
for a fee. So that makes me itchy.
And then... why is there a private jet?
And it's-- and it's flying into the house.
Yeah, that doesn't-- And since 9/11,
-that's a bad look. -Yeah, yeah.
And then this family,
which I don't know if it's his family, some family,
but we actually, literally, just for fun in the room
Googled "picture of family,"
and here's what comes up.
It's the third family.
-FEIMSTER: Oh! -SPADE: That's how lazy.
-FEIMSTER: Come on. -And that's-- Is that a real family?
He didn't even go two pages in.
I know, but-but, in-in all honesty, who does?
-"This one works." -If my Google is not on the first page,
-I-I bail out. Uh... -I love that he's like,
"I'm gonna get into another shady business deal
while the IRS is watching me."
(laughing)
I don't want him doing my taxes. I don't want him--
I like-- I like the Fyre Fest thing though.
-I like that he was involved in that. That thing was... -Yeah.
That was like Coachella that went real sideways on him.
-FEIMSTER: It was. Yeah. -Yeah.
-Anyway, uh-- Oh, we have a... -It was every douchebag
you wanted to get screwed over, so it was joyous.
-SPADE: I know. No one felt horrible. -Yeah.
-It was good. -(applause)
A bu-bunch of rich people being like,
"They're making us eat cheese sandwiches!"
-FITZSIMMONS: Yeah, yeah, yeah. -SPADE: No.
The worst part was, I like cheese sandwiches.
All right, Prince Harry...
-He's from England. -Yeah.
-(laughter) -And... -So you think
currently that my squad is Tekashi69 and Prince Harry?
-SPADE: I know. I know. -That's what it is? Really?
SPADE: That's the only one in your phone contacts--
these two people.
But Meg Marks, uh--
they, um, just split with the royal family,
as you've heard on every day of the show this week.
But they've also got possible gigs lined up.
Burger King tweeted they'd be happy
-to give Prince Harry a job if he wants. -(laughter, groaning)
This is one of those scam things
-where, like, a company wants press. -FEIMSTER: Yeah.
So they, like, after the election, they go,
"We'll give Hillary Clinton a million
-to pose naked in Penthouse." -FEIMSTER: Right.
You know, and then, they get all the attention,
-but they don't really do it. -FEIMSTER: Yeah.
Does Ja Rule own Burger King? Is that what...? -SPADE: Ja Rule?
-Is he involved in this scam, too? -It smells of him, yeah.
-(laughter) -I mean,
it is the one place where he could actually be king.
-(laughter, groaning) -That is true. That's true. -Yeah.
(applause and cheering)
Well, I think... I think Meghan is into it,
because she does not want
-to go to another White Castle. -(groaning)
SPADE: Aw.
I was gonna say, "Could live at White Castle."
(applause)
Yeah. These two crazy kids.
They're up in Canada.
Um, I... You know what?
If they came on the show, I would give them $5,000.
-Oh, yeah? -That's a... that's a pretty firm offer.
-I have to check. -They might nego... they might negotiate.
-Three grand. -Okay.
FaceTime.
$1,000... for a phone call.
And $500 if they drive by and beep.
(laughter)
That's a standing offer until 5:00 p.m. today.
I hope they pick the drive-by-and-beep.
They could just say they did. I'd still pay 'em.
I don't know. I can't tell.
All right, we're moving on because this is...
touchy subject for me.