• What phone app charged a thousand dollars just to tell you you’re rich?
How much will people buy a bottle of water for?
These are 10 of the most embarrassingly expensive, yet totally unnecessary things ever put on
sale.
10 – Gold Toilet Paper - $1.2 Million • An Australian company by the name of Toilet
Paper Man created a single roll of usable 24-carat gold toilet paper.
It’s on sale for about $1.5 million Australian dollars.
• It’s 3-ply, and when used, gold flakes apparently fall onto the floor, which is supposed
to add sophistication, but that sort of relies on those flakes not being covered in shit.
• To sweeten the deal, they advertise that they will hand-deliver the toilet paper gift-wrapped
with a bottle of champagne.
But they ask you to supply the glasses.
Cheapskates.
9 – I Am Rich App - $1,000 • When I Am Rich hit the App Store in 2008,
it only went live for one day before Apple took it down.
But in that one day, eight people bought the app for 999 dollars and 99 cents – the highest
allowable price on the App store.
• So what does I Am Rich do for a thousand dollars?
It displays a red gem in the center of the screen.
What you touch it, it displays text that says, “I am rich
I deserv it I am good,
healthy & successful” • That’s actually all it does.
The app description even says it has “no hidden function.”
It is truly, LITERALLY useless.
8 – Inflatable Outdoor Color Dot Game - $2,000 • Sooooo… this is Twister.
They won’t call it Twister, they just say it’s “Based on the popular game that originated
in the 1960s.”
• And that’s fine.
It even looks kind of fun with the inflatable mat.
But it costs TWO THOUSAND DOLLARS, and they don’t even have the decency to provide the
inflation pump.
• For that kind of money, you could just buy four Twister mats, rent a bouncy castle,
and put a down payment on a car.
7 – Ghost Detector - $50,000 • Lady Gaga lives to entertain, even when
she’s not trying to.
The popstar is apparently so afraid of ghostly spirits, she has dropped tens of thousands
of dollars on ghost detection equipment.
• She apparently takes the electro-magnetic machine with her when she hits the road, so
she can be safe from paranormal activity at all times.
• Which is kind of weird, because she also believes she’s the reincarnated spirit of
her deceased aunt.
So then, wouldn’t the machine detect her as well?
6 – Antarctic Beer - $800 • Nail Brewing wanted a new twist on their
flagship beer, Nail Ale.
• So they got an iceberg from Antarctica, melted it, and made beer with it.
• The resulting Antarctic Nail Ale was sold at auction for $800, making it the most expensive
beer in the world.
But hey, at least they donated the proceeds to charity.
5 – Fishing Lure - $1 million • Some people fish for the sport of it.
Others use fishing as an excuse to drink a lot of beer on a boat.
• The absurdly rich, apparently, use fishing as a way to show off their wealth to a bunch
of fish.
That’s the only real explanation for this diamond and ruby-encrusted fishing lure.
• Also, what happens when your line snaps?
Do you just… buy another lure?
4 – The Barbecue Dining Boat - $50,000 • This boat, despite looking like a giant
inner tube, has a built-in barbecue grill, for those days when it’s just not good enough
to take the boat for a spin and THEN have a barbecue.
• The boat has table settings for 10 people, just in case you wanted to show 9 other people
how you spent 50 thousand dollars on a barbecue boat.
• And that 50 grand even gets you a motor that allows you to travel speeds of up to
two and A HALF miles per hour!
3 – Louis Vuitton Skateboard - $8,250 • Ah, the world of high fashion.
Where you put a name on a thing and watch the price go up by 5,000 percent.
• In this case, the thing was a skateboard.
They put the name “Louis Vuitton” on it in pink a bunch of times, called it a design,
put it in a nice case, and charged more than 8,000 dollars for it.
• It’s hard to say whether the skateboard itself is actually any good, because it’s
highly unlikely that anybody who bought one actually knows how to ride a skateboard.
2 – Ramen Noodles with Gold Leaf - $180 • When it comes to instant ramen noodles,
even paying $1.80 seems a little steep.
If you go to a really nice, authentic place, you might expect to pay $18.
• Or you can go to Koa, a Japanese restaurant in Manhattan, that is serving ramen with actual
flecks of gold in the broth, for $180.
• The restaurant bills it as the “world’s most expensive ramen,” which makes sense,
because ramen is supposed to be filling and inexpensive.
Adding gold to food gives it no additional flavor or nutrition.
It’s like the “I Am Rich” of food seasonings.
1 – Bottled Water - $60,000 • For most people, water is something you
just get out of your tap.
On the other hand, millions die each year because they can’t get clean water.
• Oblivious to both those groups of people, the filthy rich willingly pay $60,000 for
a 750 ml of water, just because they can.
• But what makes it so expensive?
Gold, obviously.
The bottle is made of handcrafted glass coated in gold.
• The water itself is a blend of spring water from France and Fiji, combined with
Icelandic glacier water.
Oh, and there’s gold in the water, too, because of course there is.
What’s the point of living the good life if you can’t urinate gold?