FOLKS, MY NEXT GUEST IS AN ACTRESS, AUTHOR AND, AS YOU WILL
SOON SEE, A DOG LOVER.
PLEASE WELCOME CARRIE FISHER!
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) ♪
>> Stephen: WELCOME.
( CHEERING ) >> Stephen: YOU CAN LEAVE THEM
ON.
>> I CAN'T SEE ANYTHING.
I DON'T WANT ANYONE TO RECOGNIZE ME.
>> Stephen: IT'S VERY JACKIE O.
>> IS IT?
I'M OFTEN CONFUSED FOR JACKIE O., OR CONFUSED ABOUT JACKIE O.
>> Stephen: WHO IS THIS?
GARY.
HE'S FRENCH.
>> Stephen: OKAY.
AND YOU'VE RUBBED YOUR HAND WITH A-1 STEAK SAUCE BEFORE COMING
OUT HERE?
>> I'M NOT GOING TO TELL YOU WHAT I DID WITH MY HAND.
( LAUGHTER ) >> Stephen: ALL RIGHT.
HAVE I MET GARY BEFORE IS THIS YOU AND I MET AT A BENEFIT IN
LOS ANGELES -- >> I WAS BAD AT IT.
>> Stephen: NO, YOU HAVE BEEN DEEPLY OFFENSIVE TO IRISH PEOPLE
BUT NOT BAD AT IT.
>> ALCOHOLIC IRISH PEOPLE.
>> Stephen: I APOLOGIZE.
AND YOU LOOKED GREAT IN A BEARD AND I TOLD YOU YOU COULD
GET SO LAID FOR HAVING THAT BEARD.
>> Stephen: AND I SAID -- SEE ME AFTER CLASS.
>> YES.
>> Stephen: WAS THAT GARY I MET THERE?
>> THAT WAS GARY.
>> Stephen: HI, GARY.
HOW ARE YA?
ALL RIGHT.
>> HE'S A LITTLE NERVOUS.
THIS IS HIS FIRST LATE NIGHT.
( LAUGHTER ) >> Stephen: NOW, YOU'VE GOT A
NEW BOOK.
( LAUGHTER ) GARY, I KNOW THE FEELING.
NOW, YOU GOT A NEW BOOK HERE WHICH YOU WROTE WITH GARY.
IT'S CALLED "THE PRINCESS DIARIST," AND THESE ARE YOUR
DIARIES FROM WHEN YOU WERE SHOOTING "STAR WARS" BACK IN THE
DAY.
>> THAT'S RIGHT.
>> Stephen: WOW, THANK YOU FOR SHARING THIS WITH US.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) IN THE BOOK, YOU REVEAL THAT,
WHEN YOU WERE SHOOTING "STAR WARS," YOU AND HARRISON FORD HAD
AN AFFAIR.
>> THAT'S -- NO!
>> Stephen: I'M JUST AS SHOCKED AS YOU ARE.
( LAUGHTER ) WHY NOW?
WHY TELL US NOW?
>> WELL, I WOULD PROBABLY GET EARLY ONSET ALZHEIMER'S AND
FORGET AND THEN YOU WOULD NEVER KNOW.
>> Stephen: OKAY.
NO, I FOUND THE DIARIES AND DECIDED TO PUBLISH THEM AND IT
WAS A MISTAKE.
>> Stephen: IT WAS A MISTAKE, REALLY?
>> NO, BUT IT IS TOO BIG OF A STORY THAT I CAN'T HANDLE.
>> Stephen: EVEN THOUGH IT'S YOUR STORY.
>> IT'S MY STORY.
>> Stephen: CAN YOU NOT HANDLE IT OR CAN HARRISON FORD NOT
HANDLE IT?
>> I'M SURE HE CAN'T HANDLE IT AT ALL.
( LAUGHTER ) >> Stephen: I YOU WERE YOUNG.
IT WAS YOUR LIFE, TOO.
>> IT WAS 40 YEARS AGO.
IF I WOULD HAVE WAITED 50, I WOULD HAVE LOOKED WORSE.
>> Stephen: YOU LOOKED FANTASTIC.
>> SO IT WAS THE RIGHT TIME.
>> Stephen: SERIOUS STUFF?
THE AFFAIR?
>> THERE'S A LOT OF SEXUAL DETAILS.
>> Stephen: IS ANY OF THIS ACTION LIKE THAT, LIKE THE
SERIOUS STUFF LIKE THAT?
IS IT ANY OF THIS ACTION?
>> YEAH.
( LAUGHTER ) >> Stephen: IT IS?
THE EYE ON CANNON WILL FIRE SEVERAL BLASTS.
>> Stephen: IT RINGS A BELL.
OKAY.
WERE YOU ASKED -- WERE YOU ASKED TO PHYSICALLY TRANSFORM AT ALL
AS PRINCESS LEIA?
I HEARD THEY ASKED YOU TO LOSE WEIGHT.
>> THEY DID.
THEY ALWAYS DO.
THEY WANT TO HIRE PART OF ME, NOT ALL OF ME.
SO THEY WANT TO HIRE ABOUT THREE-FOURTHS.
>> Stephen: UH-HUH.
O I HAVE TO GET RID OF THE FOURTH SOMEHOW.
>> Stephen: FOR THE FIRST MOVIE OR THE BLONDE --
>> I MADE A JOKE, THE FOURTH CAN'T BE WITH ME.
I MADE IT JUST FOR YOU.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) >> Stephen: SO IS THIS BEFORE
THE FIRST MOVIE OR IS THIS BEFORE THE BRONZE BIKINI SECOND
MOVIE.
>> NO, BRONZE BIKINI, I WAS SOLID.
>> Stephen: I NOTICED.
A LOT OF PEOPLE NOTICED.
>> Stephen: WHERE DID YOU GO?
HOW DID YOU -- >> NO, THE FIRST MOVIE, I HAD --
WELL I GUESS YOU WOULD STILL CALL IT BABY FAT.
I WOULD LIKE THE CALL IT THAT BUT IT WAS PROBABLY JUST FAT.
( LAUGHTER ) SO I WENT TO A FAT FARM WHERE
THEY HARVEST FAT, AND I WAS THERE WITH LADY BIRD JOHNSON AND
ANN LANDERS, WHO WERE MY PEERS AT THE TIME.
>> Stephen: WHAT?!
YES, THEY WERE THERE, ALSO.
>> Stephen: WERE THEY NICE TO YOU?
>> WELL, LADY BIRD COULDN'T FIGURE OUT O THE NAME OF THE MOV
I WAS IN AND WAS THINKING IT WAS "CAR WASH" AND WAS LOOKING
FORWARD TO IT.
>> Stephen: I JUST CAN'T WAIT TO SEEING THAT CAR R "CAR WASH"
MOVIE!
>> YES.
AND ANN LANDERS HAD A LOT OF ADVICE WHICH I OBVIOUSLY DIDN'T
TAKE.
>> Stephen: LET ME SAY ABOUT THE CHARACTER OF PRINCESS LEIA.
SHE HAS THE FORCE, WHY DOESN'T SHE GET A LIGHT CABER?
>> YOU KNOW, IT'S THE WHOLE WOMEN -- IT'S A BAD THING FOR
WOMEN.
EVEN IN SPACE, WOMEN ARE -- YOU KNOW, THERE IS A DOUBLE STANDARD
WITH THE FORCE, EVEN WITH THE FORCE.
>> Stephen: THE ONLY FORCE SHE EVER USES IS THIS -- SOMETHING'S
WRONG.
SHE DOES THAT.
( LAUGHTER ) YOU CAN DO IT BETTER THAN I CAN.
>> I SENSE MY TWIN IS SOMEWHERE AND I BETTER HIDE THE COOKIES
( LAUGHTER ) >> Stephen: WHY DO YOU HAVE TO
COMFORT LUKE WHEN ONE GUY DIES, BEN KENOBI, BUT YOUR WHOLE
PLANET HAS EXPLODED AND NO ONE'S COMFORTING YOU.
>> THAT'S RIGHT!
I'M STILL UPSET ABOUT THAT!
>> Stephen: HAVE YOU ADDRESSED THIS BEFORE?
>> NOT JUST MY PLANET.
MY MOTHER, MY STEPFATHER, AS I FOUND OUT LATER, MY RECORD
COLLECTION, ALL MY CLOTHES, SO I HAVE TO WEAR THAT WHITE DRESS
ALL THE TIME -- >> Stephen: GARY?
EXACTLY.
WELL, I HAD -- YEAH.
SO IT WAS VERY SAD FOR ME.
>> Stephen: WELL, WE'RE GOING TO TAKE A LITTLE COMMERCIAL
BREAK HERE.
WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH MORE CARRIE FISHER.