- We're back and this hour we're unlocking our
vault to share never before seen stories from
some of our favorite guests.
We always love having Melissa McCarthy here
mostly because also I see her at home.
She's my neighbor, but she's cool here too.
Um, on a recent visit, she shared a letter
she had written to herself years ago,
basically words of wisdom she wanted to embrace.
So it included things like in 10 years,
you won't remember his name and
just eat the damn cookie.
So here's some more of what Melissa had to say.
And then there is
"A walk of shame can be character building".
(applause and cheer)
- Right!
- So, we've all had them
- We've all had them guys, if you haven't, I suggest it.
- Most of them may have been in Vegas.
(laughter)
So which walk was most character building for you?
- I will say. Sorry, mom and dad.
That was in college. I was walking home.
I was very Gothic in college,
so it's like huge blue black hair, full length cape
stacked crazy like,
combat boots or like seventies go-go boots.
No one was dressing like this at the time.
And it was the next morning.
And I was walking along on campus,
like kind of on a highway.
And I thought, this is not my best moment
because there was no way I was like,
I'm up and getting coffee.
I had like glitter,
and it was very much an evening look.
And an evening look for someone who is very
like punk rock.
So at like eight in the morning, I was like, ah, right.
But then I thought, you know, I look back on that now,
And I'm like, eh, who cares?
- But I like the character building though.
- It is because I'm like that,
whatever that experience was, I was like, it's,
again it's all the, it's laying the foundation.
And I'm like, oh, well.
- I love that. I love.
Okay. So you also wrote go all in.
You'll never get today back. I love this.
So before your career started,
you were almost going to quit, right?
I did not know this.
- Yeah
I think. It was like, I-
- I almost quit at the beginning of mine.
- Did you really? God that would have been terrible.
- Like right after idol.
- After idol you almost did? Are you kidding?
- No, I literally called my mom and I was like,
on the way to, I was like, this is not my people,
these aren't my people.
I was like, yeah.
- You know you get something you still have to
navigate are these the right crowd
- Yeah and like, who's around you,
You have no control when you're 19 or 20. And I was like,
this is not like, look here,
I was a good waitress,
- I liked waiting tables.
- I liked waiting tables. I love people
- I can hem pants, I can sew.
- Yeah I'm like, I can quilt.
See we have so much in common?
No, I'm just saying I've been at that point too though.
When it's like, it's like, oh, I'm just, uh
it's not, what's worth it.
- What's worth it. And to,
and the thing of trying not to live with regrets,
you know, or being like, oh, I should have,
it's like the car ride home.
Like I wish I would have said, you know,
without going crazy. But like,
I don't like how you talk to me or I don't like,
how this is happening or can we do it differently?
Blah, blah, blah. I did so many on the way home
It is always like, God, am I good in the car.
Cause on the way home, it is like
I would always like figure it out.
- Like download everything that, yeah.
- But the bells, the red flag was going off in the moment.
I just didn't listen to it.
And I think we have this incredibly loud bell, big red flag.
And we haven't because when
something's not right, we know it.
And then we're kind of taught to, I think,
especially as women, but I think everybody
we tend to, we're kind of taught and trained
to be like don't make fast.
- Don't ruffle feathers.
- Don't be crazy.
Like just let it go, blah, blah, blah.
And it's like, we don't have to like, you know,
I'm not pulling out switchblades,
but I try to like complete each day. And in the
moment, be like, wait a minute.
Let's, this is going, this is going in a
direction that's maybe not great for anybody.
And it's always better to talk about
it in the moment than regret it the next day,
cause you can't go back.
You can't go back to that moment
and take care of it and take care of yourself
in the moment. So I try to be,
I guess it's part of being present.
- Yeah, no one hurt, and that's hard to do.
- It's a process.
- And it's also sticking up for yourself.
I think that was what ended up.
My mom was like the
super nurturing moment for her. But she,
she was, she said to me, she was like,
don't let, you're not you don't,
you're not liking it because of what you said originally.
Like, I don't like how people are talking to me.
I don't like how they're talking about me. Like I'm product.
Like I don't want to do this.
I don't want to be naked on the cover. I don't want to like,
it's just not me. It's like, if it was me,
I'd totally do it. But it was one of those things
where she was like, don't let somebody else like
steal your moment because they don't like how
you want to do it. Like it's you that-
So anyway, it was just kind of like good words,
like fight for yourself in those moments.
- It is, and it's like, you can fight,
you can fight for yourself, still with kindness.
You don't have to be like combative.
Sometimes maybe you have to be, but it is-
- I hated that when I was young, did you?
I hated confrontation.
- That's why I stopped.
I started in standup and it's why I stopped because there's
always, by the way, there's always a guy
in every club going "take your top off."
And you're like, when has that ever worked for you?
Like when is yelling,
and a women be like, oh my God, you're right.
You know, it's like, I just thought, and the
only way you could get them to stop,
you had to shame them until they were
so embarrassed that they stopped talking.
- Yeah.
- And I would finish up my little set and then
I would feel terrible because I was like,
I just wanted to tell some weird story
about my day, And I ended up making this guy,
that's yelling, take your top off,
which means he's probably not doing great,
and I had to make him feel really,
really bad about himself in order
to make him stop talking.
And he shouldn't have been yelling take your top off.
- Also though maybe you're the one person that
finally told him to shut up, so.
- Maybe, and I did not. Mom, I did not take my top off.
So that's, that's one for me.
- I have to show this video because
I have not seen this movie ever.
- Oh god, yes.
- So I have to show this tape.
- It was going to be a boxing movie, it wasn't.
(laughing and crying)
(melancholic piano sounds)
- It was really beautiful.
Oh my god she was, perfect.
Oh my God. It's so difficult.
(more laughter and crying)
(cheers and applause)
- Oh my god, it's so difficult.
- There's always- By the way that's
my niceness in Sammy that as I was sobbing,
she's like, let me get the camera.
But I had not. You lose some, just sometimes those movies
that you're like, there is no reason I didn't see it.
You just miss it. I don't read reviews.
I don't like to know what a movie is going to be about.
I like to be surprised. And so it was like,
oh my God, how did I not see this movie?
I do this movie club on zoom.
So I was like, this week it's million dollar baby.
I'm like, I don't know much about boxing, but I'm being,
maybe it's a fish out of water or something like friends
that, you know, unlikely friends and we're watching it.
And I'm like, oh, this is nice.
And the two people I was watching with kept going,
they kept looking at me and I was like, what are you doing?
They're like, you don't know what this is about.
I'm like, it's about boxing.
- That's what I think.
And then it hit a certain,
there's a certain moment in it.
That is so devastating. And you have no idea.
Who's seen the movie.
- I've not seen it.
It is a spectacular, it's so good.
- I don't want to cry.
- and it's something
you want to see once because Hillary Swank is,
is perfection in it.
but I was crying so hard and I could not get it together.
And I like wept for like 20 minutes.
And everybody who-
- Do you love that? I love that release
- The next day I was like, I'm good.
I'm good for like a month.