[music]
This week's Music Monday is the rewind edition with F.T. Island's Severely
[clip from F.T. Island's "Severely"]
Now, there's no dance or English to talk about in this song,
so we just get to talk about the music video
EXCELLENT!
First off, it was a great song
As we already know, Hongki, or as I like to call him, the hunky one, is a totally awesome singer.
When we listened to it live it's like there is NO difference between recorded and live.
Fantastic! However,
I will NEVER GO TO NORAEBANG WITH YOU HUNKY!!!! NEVVVVVAAAARRRRRR!!!!!!!
You're just going to embarrass me with your amazing singing voice
And even though the song's quite sad, it's still quite nice.
We're really happy that F.T. Island is doing so well.
F.T. Island, though, are playing their own music, and singing their guts out
in a really under-represented genre in Korea.
F.T. Island's videos, though, are kind of a mixed bag,
sometimes they do kind of artsy videos like Sarangsarang,
and sometimes they have plot oriented videos.
It's not about showing off their faces or bodies or dancing on bizarre sets.
We're very happy that they put in a lot of effort into making their videos.
This video, just like Hello Hello, gives the viewers a story to watch
Unfortunately, though, I would say whoever wrote the story for this video
kind of dropped the ball.
This video was impossibly annoying for us
since you already know we're very perceptive to details.
DAMN YOU DEGREE FROM PRESTIGIOUS UNIVERSITY!
YOU HAVE CURSED ME WITH MY GIANT BRAIN!
Hey! Hey! Spudgy just farted.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Moving on
As usually, it wasn't about the acting,
The Hunky One had some really good moments,
especially at the beginning when he's sobbing his eyes out at the funeral
but that doesn't save the story from being utterly mind bending.
BLEW MY MIND BWEEP BWEEP BYOO BYOO
Ok, so the video starts with Hunky crying at his girlfriend's funeral.
PS, Love the nail polish and the new hairstyle.
He leaves the funeral, and runs into his girlfriend who is now miraculously alive.
He's in nostril flaring shock when he sees her so he hugs her,
but she doesn't seem to know him, so she pushes him away,
gives him stink face and then walks into the church confused
Soon afterwards, Hunky be creeping at her dance studio
as she practices for her upcoming DEATH ballet recital.
He looks at the newspaper and realizes that it's January 17th, rather than January 24,
which was when his girlfriend died.
And so, it turns out, he's got one week to save the girl before she dies again.
Now, there's something that's a bit off with the numbers for me:
She dies on the 24th, right?
But he's transported back to the 17th.
And when he sees her on the 17th, she doesn't know who he is, right?
So, here's my question: That would suggest that he's known her for less than a week? Seriously?
Were they dating just for one, small week?
From the way he was sobbing at the beginning,
we thought this was his lifelong partner or something.
Okay, so in order for this drama to make sense,
let's assume they've been dating for a while,
but she's lost her memories in this whole time-warp thing
Also, second thing.
Girls, I don't know about you,
but if a guy I didn't know ran up to me and started crying and hugging me,
I WOULD NOT GO OUT ON A DATE WITH HIM THE NEXT DAY
ESPECIALLY AFTER HE BE CREEPING OUTSIDE MY DANCE STUDIO.
I DON'T CARE HOW HUNKY HE IS!
He's giving off the crazy vibes and I'm pretty sure he doesn't blink.
Remember girls: it doesn't matter how hot he is: if he's crazy, it's time to move on.
As for the Hunky one, really?
You really couldn't pick a better girl than this one?
YOU'RE THE LEAD SINGER OF FT ISLAND!
You deserve a lot better than this…how do I say this lightly
…….unperceptive girl.
Okay, when she sees a newspaper clipping about her death
she tells him to leave because she thinks he's a stalker.
Really? That's the conclusion you come to?
How about trying to hear him out a bit more?
If some guy had a newspaper clipping about MY death
and told me that he was from the future and he's trying to save my life,
I'd give him a little bit more time to explain himself
But this isn't just her fault. I'm also going to fault the Hunky one for this part.
How about you work on your communication skills a bit.
You're trying to save her life.
Don't sit there and stammer like you just peed your pants in class AND THEN JUST LEAVE.
Let me show you how these scene should have gone…
What? Are you a stalker? Get out!
I don't think you understand the importance of the situation here.
I'M FROM THE FUTURE!
THAT'S WHY I HAVE THIS NEWSPAPER FROM THE FUTURE
BECAUSE I'M FROM THE FUTURE
THAT'S HOW I KNEW IT WAS GONNA RAIN
BECAUSE I'M FROM THE FUTURE
AND IN THE FUTURE, YOU'RE GONNA DIIIIIIIIEEEEE
I'M GONNA DIE
AHHHH!
Wow! Did you see how easy that was? Death avoided.
I'm looking at you Junsu and I'm looking at you Hunky.
But then nooooo, on the day of the performance,
The Hunky one decides to go out jogging all day or something
instead of staying close to the girl and protecting her.
Listen: EVEN IF SHE HATES YOU THIS IS WHEN YOU STALK HER FROM THE BUSHES!!!
Chloroform her. Shoot a poison dart in her ass. I don't care
Just don't let her get hit by this car, again.
That's your only point right now!
Where the hell were you all this time,
and why are you only trying to find her just right before her performance?
FARKAS! OH FARKAS! WHERE ARE YOU FARKAS
OH THERE YOU ARE!
Oh, wait a second.
OH NO! She's gonna die!
But that's a blue butterfly!
I'll get you butterfly. Come here!
Ok, so whatever,
Hunky finally gets to the crosswalk of doom and yes, there is a car coming,
but please note what happens next.
You can see that the girl is like five lines ahead of car,
CLEARLY ALREADY OUT OF THE PATH OF THAT CAR.
In fact, she's so far away from the car,
you could probably squeeze another car between her
Can you tell me why, then, is Hunky standing with his hands out in front of the car trying to stop it from…what?
She's already safe. She's been safe for a while now,
How about you get out of that car lane now and let the car go by?
Now, this moment has to be compared to JYJ's death car hitting scene in "In Heaven"
because the girl in that video is in the direct path of the car,
and Junsu fails to push her out of the way.
In this video, Hunky ends up just plain old kills himself
I think we have some lessons to be learned from both JYJ and FT Island about life in Korea.
1) NEVER listen to music and cross the street.
Your music might also blind you into being unable to see or sense incoming traffic.
2) Note how the "safe to walk" light just turns green and she starts crossing the street.
She gets halfway across and the light's already red.
Lesson to be learned: In Korea, you don't walk across intersections.
You run. RUUUNNN!
AHHHHHHHHHH
Lastly, we'd like to believe that everyone knows enough about first aid
to know that shaking someone after they've been hit by a car
is not the best form of help.
If you don't know first aid yourself, call someone who does,
like, 911 for instance (which is 119 in Korea, by the way).
It's like the toilets that swirl the other way on the other side of the world.
It's like the 911 is swirling.
And, lastly, perhaps the biggest cue as to how much we dislike this girl,
at the end of the video, when she's crying, you see the newspaper change
It goes from a report of her dying in an accident
to a report of her successful ballet performance… on the 24th
the same night of Hunky's death.
This means that the girl, who was walking to her ballet performance,
watches Hunky risk his life die trying to protect her,
but then she just goes to her ballet performance anyways.
Really? Are you that heartless?
This man dies for you. You witness a bleeding man die, and you're sobbing your eyes out,
and then you go tralalala off to dance?
Be honest: Is that why you were screaming at him?
Omg no!
Do you know what this means?
I'm gonna be late because of you!
I have to stick around for all the reports!
BOOHOO!
And to me, it seems like logically that article should have changed to
"GUY DIES IN CAR ACCIDENT"
but I guess ballet is more important to report on than Hunky's death.
Sorry about that, the Hunky one.
[music]
Last week we asked you who would win in an epic rap battle:
Block B or B.A.P.
And the winner was…we are calling this a draw
This was a crazy competition. We had no idea this would be so controversial.
On our main homepage, it seemed like B.A.P. won,
but on our Facebook poll, Block B won by a hundred votes or so
and on YouTube it was just crazy close
So, to answer your question, who's going to win the epic rap battle:
Case closed!
For this week's Rewind edition, we ask you which video with the nearly identical plot you preferred:
F.T. Island's "Severely", or JYJ's "In Heaven"
Leave your votes in the comments, or in our Facebook poll,
and we'll announce the winners next week.
Also, thanks to all the Primadonnas who voted for F.T. Island this week,
if there's a video you want to see us do for next Kpop Music Monday
head on over to http://www.eatyourkimchi.com/kpopcharts and get voting
Lastly, don't forget to like and favourite this video and to subscribe for more Music Mondays
Take it away, Spudgy!
[music]