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The House of Lords or, to give it it's proper title,
The Right Honourable, The Lords Spiritual and Temporal of the United Kingdom of Great...
(♫ ♫ ♫)
...Britain and Northern Ireland in Parliament Assembled dot gov dot uk
is a big room in that building there. And it's full of Lords.
Lords, also known as peers, have a really important job.
They look at the ideas that MPs come up with for new laws
and check the fine details to make sure they're just right.
If they're not happy, they send them back and say
"Do it again!"
Being a peer is brilliant!
You get to wear fancy red robes, people have to call you Lord something,
you get £300 expenses per day, you can fly,
you're allowed to sleep during debates, and you get to keep the job for life.
So, how do you get to be one?
1. Be born a hereditary peer.
If your dad is a hereditary peer, you get to take his place when he dies.
This used to be only for men, but was changed to include women
in 1860-- Sorry, 1963,
as long as they don't have any brothers.
2. Be an Anglican bishop.
If you're a bishop in the Church of England, you automatically get
a seat in the House of Lords, because if you know how to run a church,
you know how to run the country.
3. Be chosen by the Prime Minister.
Prime Ministers can stuff the House with as many Lords as they like during their time in office.
If you want to be picked, though not essential,
it helps if you've donated money to their party.
Now, if to you, any of this seems surprising, or archaic, or batsh*t,
then there's good news!
There have been some changes over the past few years
to drag the House of Lords kicking and screaming into the 19th century.
1. The number of hereditary peers is now limited to 92.
By the way, that doesn't mean there are 92 remaining that we're waiting for to die.
When one family dies out,
the other Lords have a vote to replace them from a pool of about 800 aristocrats,
so there will always be 92 of them.
2. Leaders of other religions get to be Lords.
The 26 Church of England bishops have now been joined by leaders of other faiths:
One Methodist, one Scottish Presbyterian, one Church of Ireland and two rabbis.
3. The Prime Minister has been asked nicely not to give so many peerages.
4. In 2001, they introduced a new way of getting Lords into the House...
The Appointments Commission.
The Appointments Commission's job is to pick people from the real world
outside the usual batch of ex cabinet ministers
These "Peoples Peers" are chosen for their skills and experience
such as if they're experts in law, or science,
or the arts, or beer,
thus ensuring that the House of Lords is truly representative of the British people it serves,
with the exception of the 92 hereditary peers, 26 god-botherers, and 620 life peers chosen by the
Prime Minister, who ultimately have the final say on the laws that govern our country despite not being elected
which arguably is a positive thing because it means they're less caught up in party politics and can
concentrate on getting the job done but it also makes them completely unaccountable and the paltry reforms
in 1999 served only to legitimise how inherently undemocratic the entire institution is
and delay any meaningful reform for the foreseeable future whilst we continue to labour
under the assumption that we live in a democracy and still have a monarch...
*spluttering*
You know what? I can't be bothered to talk about this anymore. The end.
Son, I'm dying.
Yes father. You are.
*Cough*
I'm going to die, son.
I know father. It's a thundering nuisance.
Come closer...
Closer...
*Cough*
Closer....
*Cough*
There's something really important I want to say to you...
What is it, father?
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*Blergh*
Wow...
I think it's only right that you honour my dead father
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