here's what i got i'm going to complete a triathlon in concrete shoes so i put my
favorite pair of shoes into a shoe box full of concrete after letting them dry for 24 hours i
was ready to put my mind soul and feet to the test so not only is this a test of my physical ability
but it's also a test to see if these concrete shoes could withstand a one and a half mile run
a 6.2 mile bike ride and a quarter mile swim otherwise known as a super sprint triathlon so
we determined that i have to walk this loop seven times in order to get my one and a half mile mark
all right i'm about a quarter way through my first lap this ain't good i'm supposed to swim in these
so these shoes were almost 30 pounds a piece and had my feet in absolute agony i could smell the
blisters already i had no idea how i was going to walk one and a half miles let alone biking
and swimming not even halfway through my first lap with every step i took i could feel my muscle
fibers tearing the sounds of my knees cracking were screams of terror hang in there buddy but
i was in too far there was no turning back now probably should have used shoes that had some
arch support don't try this at home or anywhere don't try it oh god my back is gonna puke what
felt like an eternity later i finally finished my first lap i kept moving forward through the
treacherous terrain there's dogs everywhere running on nothing but sheer stubbornness god
laugh after laugh i was losing my sanity this is painful i had to remind myself to remember
my training i did zero training for this because i thought it'd be funny it's not funny with fatigue
and dehydration setting in i thought surely my fate was sealed i'm really nervous about the
swimming part i was doomed to die in these shoes hey oh god hey is there a doctor here right here
yeah we're gonna have to amputate it no out of fear of losing my calves i got an adrenaline
rush that was powerful enough to release me from the fetal position and give me the
strength to go the distance i had just one more lap between me and a grueling 6.2 mile bike ride
i was finally nearing the end the bike was just within reach i mounted the bike thinking
that the worst was behind me but i couldn't have been more wrong in fact this race only
got more painful and challenging with every passing minute and this time i was taking 9
longer laps i thought that riding the bike would go smoothly and that i could coast most of the way
but this track was full of flat ground and inclines i looked like a total joke out there
my feet kept slipping off the pedals jerking my knee around causing them further suffering god
damn so i duct taped the bottoms of them to give me more grip on
the pedals but it wasn't long before i was struggling again
i began to question everything why did i do this why did i think this was a good idea this wasn't
a good idea but despite every instinct telling me to stop i kept going i'm never gonna be able
to swim in these i fell down but i wasn't stopping all right almost there hold on last lap last lap
let's go let's go i had no idea how i was gonna survive the water but i didn't care my body was
on fire from the final lap and it was time for the last leg of the triathlon the quarter-mile swim
i threw my body into the frigid waters of lake ontario without hesitation the water felt
like knives as i carried 60 pounds of concrete through the lake i could feel my body giving in
my strength was running low my stamina was long gone
but if i stop now i would be pulled to the bottom to sleep with the fishes
i got a burst of animal-like energy and i started cutting through the water like butter
at this point i was entirely numb for the waist down my mind was completely blank i was in pure
survival mode and then finally all right jake that's it you're done bring it in bring it out
i was finished i couldn't believe it was over almost seven hours of suffering were behind me
i did a triathlon in concrete shoes that's all i got