- Beyonce has died.
(upbeat music)
- I don't really exactly remember like what,
how the game went.
- I don't think there was any, like, action
that it shows you.
As I recall, it's just kind of, like, a picture
and then text.
- The only thing I remember from this game
is something about dysentery.
- That's like the only thing I remember.
Just like constantly dying of diseases.
- But it was still really fun, so I don't know.
So, is there a mouse that I use?
How do you play it without a mouse?
- I do not remember having to decide these things.
Okay, I wanna be a farmer from Illinois.
That seems like very all-American.
- I'll be a banker from Boston.
- Jesus was a carpenter. I will do that.
What is the first name of the wagon leader?
- You gotta throw a friend in there.
I'll throw Keith in the wagon.
- Beyonce.
- Yolanda.
Was that a name back then?
I'm gonna make this all women.
A wagon full of women.
- Before leaving Independence, you should buy
equipment and supplies.
- I'm not gonna ask for advice because I don't need it.
- There's a lot of reading in this game.
- Gotta do a little math. We're learning.
- I feel like I might die.
Like right off the bat.
- All right. Let's do it.
- Independence is 102 miles to the Kansas River crossing.
- Weather is cool, health is good, pace is steady,
rations are filling, I'm going to continue on the trail.
- One of the oxen is injured. Already?
- Beyonce has a snake bite.
- Keith broke his arm.
Keith!
- Worst check, Beyonce. That's not an option.
- The funny thing about these old DOS games
is that you just, like, type in commands.
- There really is no situation.
It's just kind of like sending--
It's like here's a new screen.
- Let's hunt for food.
- Oh, no. How do I shoot?
Oh, my God.
- I'm literally trying to fire.
- What? How do you move?
- Oh, I just shot a bull.
Oh, I just shot another deer.
Why am I good at hunting?
I don't wanna be good at hunting.
- From the animals shot, you shot,
you got one pound of meat.
- Oh, my health is poor. Why?
- Randolph has measles!
- Taylor has died!
- One of my oxen has died.
- You guys. Quinta has died.
- All of the people in your party have died.
Okay.
- It's kind of a heavy game.
- It was harder than I expected and also I had less control
than I remember having.
- You don't get to control them really.
You just say, "Hey, go do this, go do that."
- It's just kind of, like, all right, keep pressing enter,
keep pressing space bar. (laughs)
There's no actual action on my part.
- Kids these days would hate this kind of game.
- I don't think they probably have the patience for it.
- I think little kids might like it, but the thing
is it's so, the graphics
are so bad.
- Playing this as an adult now is pretty cool.
- I would definitely play it again.
- I might play it tonight.
I might go home and play Oregon Trail
because that sounds really fun.
- I mean, I guess that if they're in a wagon,
they're showing from Missouri...
to Los Angeles?
I don't know where.
(laughs)