- Okay.
How do you describe me to others?
- I usually say, you're like my sister,
my best friend.
- Aw. - Yeah.
Other than that...
I feel like they just have to meet you.
And then, usually as they meet you
then they always say,
"Tell your mum 'hey!'"
When I see them again?
So... - Okay.
- Okay.
When you think of the
first time we met,
what do you most remember feeling?
- Oh, okay, the first time we met
was when you were born.
- Yeah.
- And I just felt so proud and so happy,
- Aw. - You know?
I saw a bouncing baby girl.
Beautiful. Healthy.
I remember counting
your fingers and toes.
I had heard that you do that,
but it really is true.
It's like you want to just make sure
everything's okay.
And I just remember
it's an immediate bond.
Yeah, it was precious. - Okay.
- Okay, my turn.
Okay... oh my-
Okay, Carla, do your best
impression of me.
- Okay...
Well, I was going to the store and then...
but before that I was going....
I called your brother.
And yes! And fantastic.
- Yeah.
- That's definitely my word. Okay...
It says here 'both'.
So I guess
am to do my best impression of you.
Mm hmm.
I just see you walking.
You know.
I see your little-
Yeah, I do see you. Right?
Getting there.
Okay. - Okay.
What something you don't
fully understand about me and why?
- Don't fully understand?
It is kind of a weird question,
because I do think
I understand
it's just different from me.
You know, I think
I've come to understand,
but it's different,
you know, like you are,
you feel a whole lot more
about your surroundings.
It's stuff like that
I'm liable to miss, you know,
your moments are longer than mine,
you know what I mean?
It seems like...
So I can't say I don't understand it,
because a lot of that
you're like your dad
in that regard,
so honestly, having you
has helped me understand him better
because y'all are so similar
in certain aspects, just like me
and your brother are so similar.
You know, it really does
soften you up because it
when you're younger,
you think he just be.
And then you realize
when you have a child like that,
you know, that's
an inherited trait, and that's
that's who that person is.
So it makes you
more responsive to it.
- Okay, what's your biggest
struggle right now
as mother and daughter?
And what can we do better
overcome it?
- Biggest struggle as
mother and daughter,
just the way we process emotions,
so sometimes like
like, you'll say you,
you don't realize
you're feeling something
and you might do something
or be a little more anxious
and then I'll be affected by it.
And then it'll
cause some type of rub
and then we have to address it.
- Right. Yeah.
- Like going through the grief
last year, I felt kind of
like out of...
It was hard to kind of find
footing and feel stable.
And so, you know,
it's always hard
for me to like, ask for help.
But also, I kind of like to
I need to process it myself
before I talk to you about it.
Sometimes I just can't.
I just can't, you know?
- Yeah.
And that's one thing
I'd like to really get better at,
because when I'm thinking it's just,
you just need some quiet time.
I can tell in your voice,
you know, if something's wrong or not.
And even if it's something wrong,
sometimes I'll just kind of
I don't want you thinking,
I'm just trying to pry
whatever, right ?
But like I said, I just try to
allow you to let me know
you want me to-
You want to talk about it
because I don't like pushing myself,
you know,
because, you know,
even when you were little,
it was- you would let me know
when you're ready to talk,
you know, so that's still the case.
I still see you. You know, I see that.
- What was the end of that question?
- It was... - Said something like...
- Okay, what can we do to better
overcome it? - Oh, okay.
I think by listening
like when we have those moments
listening to what we're asking for,
and then remembering
that when the moment comes up again.
- Right. - Yeah.
- That's hard.
- Yeah, and I think, you know,
I have asked like...
That I want you to ask, it's
okay to ask, don't feel like you pry
and I feel like you do...
I see that you do that
more and more, so... - Yeah.
And the first time
I started, I'm like,
It's going to seem...
- Like fake. - Fake
Yeah, not genuine
because that's just
not the way I speak.
You know what I mean? So what?
Then I'm like, OK, well,
you're asking- You're saying this is
what you need from me
and I want to be,
you know, I want to do
whatever I can do, right?
By the same token,
whatever you can do.
You know you're a big comfort to me. So...
But that means a lot
because I know it's
uncomfortable for you.
So when you do it, I'm like,
I know that's not natural for you.
So just the act of you doing
it makes me feel loved
because it's like
you don't care that
it's uncomfortable so...
That makes me feel like loved and heard
because I know you heard me
and you're doing it because I asked.
And just that is why
even if you don't say
the perfect thing.
That action does like,
it does what it needs to do. - Okay.
- Okay.
How do you love me?
- How? With every fiber in my body.
- Aw.
- I feel like I love you by
want to be around you
and showing you that I support
what you do.
- I think, well,
the way that I love
you, is by listening to you
because I always want you
to feel heard, you know,
because that matters to me.
- I appreciate that, yeah.
Yeah.
And I need that from time to time,
you know, like I know...
I don't want to ever feel like it's
a burden.
You know, sometimes I have to talk
my feelings out, you know,
and you hear me and you kind of
give me alternatives or, you know,
even just a release,
you know, just to deal
with something, you know,
and sometimes I just need.
I value your opinion.
So sometimes that you say: Well, ma,
you know, so and so and I'm like, okay,
I might not be ready
to receive it right now,
but I'm like: okay, okay.
So if Carla sees it that way,
then maybe I should,
you know,
maybe I can back out of it
a little bit.
It's not so big a deal, right?
- Okay.
- Okay, the last question,
if this were to be
our last conversation... - Oh Lord!
- What's something you'd never
want me to forget?
- Aw.
That I love you.
- That's easy.
I feel the same way.
- Yes.
And you really are like
my best friend.
I know I have years
where I'm like, trying
not to act like you're my best friend.
- The years, Carla.
- Or just like where I'm
trying to set boundaries.
So I'm sure that I'm grown, you know,
because we're so close.
But
yeah, but I do want you to know like.
Even when I'm feeling like dead
or I'm being a little distant,
or I'm having my quiet
time to myself like
I still see you- is like you,
the person I can
always depend on. Always and
I always love being around you.
So that's why I want you to know.
- Yeah, I definitely
I couldn't be prouder of you.
You know, I just love-
To me,
you're the perfect daughter for me.
You know, I mean, I couldn't ask
for anything more any...
You get me because I am kind of
quirky,
but you do get that.
And it might be.
Corny or whatever,
but we really are
a good mother daughter, team
and anything you ever need.
You know,
if there's breath in my body, you know?
Please ask and I'll
do everything I can, okay?
- Hi, guys!
If you were watching that video
and thinking I'd really
like to ask some of those questions
to my family members.
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