Let's not kid ourselves here. You're all familiar with this one
It's a comedy of errors a charming tale of young love transcending social barriers and a sweet memorable ending that spells hope for the future
if
You've already guessed that I'm talking about Romeo and Juliet then congratulations
You know me better than I know myself and also you have a very pessimistic mind
so yeah one of Shakespeare's most
Famous plays Romeo and Juliet is the story of two teenagers who fall in love immediately have sex and then die through stupidity
It's a more effective proponent of abstinence than Stephenie Meyer
It's inspired countless stupid teenagers to ignore their parents and do stupid rebellious things
And I'm of the personal opinion that is one of Shakespeare's finest comedies, so without further ado
Here's my apt little summary of Romeo and Juliet okay, so here's the cast headcount. There's two main groups of characters here
There's the Capulets and the Montagues
They're both aristocratic families in Verona
Which is somewhere in Italy and they have this ridiculous grudge against each other for reasons that are never adequately explained each
Family has a lord and a lady and on the Montague side we have Romeo whose pacifist Cousin Benvolio and their friend Mercutio
Well the capulet site has Juliet and her sword swinging ass-but of a cousin named Tybalt in the middle of this whole mess is
The Prince of Verona himself who's essentially been a grudging referee for this whole stupid feud our story begins in the streets of Verona where
The servants of the two houses are having a little spat with swords
Benvolio shows up to try and break up the fight and Tybalt decides to join in the fun by attacking
Benvolio great start so far right so then the rest of the city decides to join in the brawl - and then the heads of
Both houses show up, and it's just a real mess until the prince shows up, so the prince is like really guys again
And they're like we're sorry and he's like one more brawl like this
And I'll have you executed. So the mob breaks up and everyone except the Montagues goes home, so lady Montague was like
"Oh, where's my son" and Benvolio is like "yeah? He's in love again"
He's off pining somewhere, teenagers right, so Romeo flounces on screen and has a talk with Benvolio about how much love sucks and WAAaa
Romeo's pining away for some girl named Rosaline who has no interest in him because she's sworn a vow of chastity and besides
He's kind of a creep
What a tragic young lad jump cut - Lord capulet talking this dude named Paris who's some Rich count or something Paris wants to
Marry Juliet and Capulets all dude
She's [like] 13 in Paris is like I know plenty of happily married women way younger than her yeah, so yeah
Paris is kind of a creep - turns out over to Casa capulet - where we finally meet juliet
She's talking to her mom who seems to share Paris's opinion that 13 is practically over the hill for a lady of class and order
To be married to Paris at once or at least soon
She tells juliet that Paris will be at their masked ball that night
And she'd better fall in love with him or there will be some serious trouble
I gotta love this family Dynamic here cut back to the montague stooges accompanied by fan-favorite character Mercutio now Mercutio is a really fun character
90% of his lines are innuendos he snarks at [anyone] at everyone in his immediate vicinity
And a significant number of scholars think that his bromance with Romeo might not have as much of a be in it as one might
Think yeah slash pick shipping is 500 years old deal with it anyway
So Mercutio is trying to convince Romeo to get his party on but Romeo is insisting on being a big old killjoy and moping about
Love all the time so they crashed the capulet party there's dancing and junk and Romeo immediately falls in love with the next girl
He sees unsurprisingly this stunningly underage juliet thibault unfortunately recognizes Romeo's voice and since he's a montague
Resolves to murder him then in there
But lord capulet orders him to leave the kid alone since Romeo is not hurting anyone [and] is terribly considered to be a fine upstanding
young man
Who only makes a hobby out of creeping on underage girls?
Romeo goes to talk to juliet and they flirt for several creepy minutes then Juliet's nurse tells her that she has to go talk to
Her mom and Romeo realizes that ah he's fallen in love with his family's hated enemy
And then juliet realizes that ah she's fallen in love with her family's hated enemy. Oh, no
So Romeo was hanging around the capulet garden since he's fallen in tragic Stalker. Love with Juliet he hides from
Benvolio and Mercutio who are busily trying to summon him by shouting out attractive female features balcony scene
Romeo sees juliet on her balcony gazing tragically out of the night so Romeo waxes poetic about how pretty she is and she waxes poetic
About how tragic their love is off only Romeo were someone else in blah blah blah and eventually Romeo lets her know that he's there
[and] then they flirt for a while and juliet's like
And Romeo's like how's nine o'clock sound and Juliet's like it's a day romeo goes to friar laurence this monkeys friends with and he's like
To do it
I just had the best night the friars like what without girl
Rosalind and Romeo's like who is rosalyn so the friar borates him for forgetting his true?
Love so quickly and by the way in case you were wondering we never ever
See rosalyn she's so relevant guys [Romeo] tells the nurse to tell Juliet to meet him at Friar Lawrence's place to get married [that] afternoon
Well that was kind of Sudden
So the nurse goes and tells juliet and Romeo and juliet made up at Friar [laurence] to sell that afternoon and are married
Over to Mercutio and Benvolio again. They're just kind of hanging out, but then tibalt shows up
This time though he's not looking for a fight. [he's] just looking for Romeo however as soon as Romeo shows up
It turns out tibble totally was looking for a fight after all
He's like come at me Romeo and Romeo's like dude. I don't even care right now
Everything is sunshine and rainbows and [tibbles] like draw your sword and fight me Mercutio is like well if Romeo is not Gonna
Then I'll be happy too
so then they have this slapstick sword fight and
Occasionally pitchfork for a little while and Romeo decides to ruin everything by jumping in the middle of the fight [and] then thibault stabs Mercutio
In the chest under Romeo's arm nice going hero, so Romeo's like Mercutio, bro
are you all right Mercutio is like well the stab wound doesn't seem to be as deep as well and
Preliminary scans indicate that it's definitely less than 10 feet wide but somehow
I think it'll do the trick
Screw you guys and then he dies
Romeo gets enraged and immediately kills tybalt in a duel then flees the crime scene then the prince shows up
And he's like where these dead guys come from and Benvolio is like [tabled] killed you bro, Mercutio
so Romeo stabbed him in the chest and lady capulet is like have him executed at once and the prince is like [I] think I'll
just exile him
So then juliet learns that Romeo is gonna be banished because he killed her cousin and she's like I'm so conflicted
No, not never mind [Romeo's] at Friar Lawrence's place again
Having a Meltdown when Juliet's nurse drops by and delivers a ring from Juliet. So he immediately tears up he and Juliet Shares some
liaison yeah
and then he vanishes off to Mantua for a while with the
Understanding that the friar will send him updates about his status back in Verona also his mom dies from grief off screen
But no one really cares
Juliet's parents decide to cheer her up by marrying her off to Paris at once
Juliet is understandably upset and her father threatens to throw her out onto the street
If she refuses, [I] just love this family dynamic so juliet decides to do [something] desperate with the aid of the friar
She's gonna fake her own death with a potion that'll put her into a coma for about two days the friar will send a message
To Romeo he'll return in secret
And be there when she wakes up then they'll be free to run away together a plan this well-thought-out couldn't possibly fail. Oh
Right so juliet drinks the potion and goes into a coma and her family immediately panics and holds her funeral
But it turns out that poor Romeo never got the message the friar laurence sent since the messenger got delayed by a plague yet another
Advantage that email has over the postal service
So when he receives news that juliet is quote-unquote dead he flips out and resolves to commit suicide
Romeo buys a poison then returns to Verona in order to Die beside
Juliet however when he gets to her to him he runs into Paris who immediately attacks him because reasons they fight in Paris dies Romeo
Sees Juliet's Corpse drinks his poison and dies the friar shows
Just too late with his [juliet's] totes not dead dude message and right on cue
Juliet wakes up sees Romeo's corpse a real one this time tells the friar
Yeah
I'll be right behind you and then stabs herself in the chest with Romeo's dagger and dies for real this time
Then the entire rest of the cast assembles around the star-crossed lovers and ponder's the benefits of familial counselling the end. What is a
youth
Impetuous fun
What is a made?
Ice end is a
the world Wags on
Roars we'll do
It then we'll fade
so
Darcy Use
so does
the fairest maid