In the background, many of us are terrified of so much – disgrace, illness, sacking,
our mortality, the suffering and death of loved ones… When these fears come up, we
are often encouraged, out of kindness, to think of the best-case scenarios. It’s a
well-meaning move, but it also – unintentionally – leaves our fears to fester; they fill
us with unnamed dread and sometimes loom far larger than they should. So an opposite move
– displayed here – involves looking our anxieties directly in the eye, refusing to
be cowed by them and examining them in exhaustive detail so as to drain them of their debilitating
power. Doing so is liable to bring us to an important realisation: we could cope – even
if the worst came to the worst… What follows are some invitations to meditate on scary
things, not in order to depress us, but to lend us a buoyant, optimistic sense of our
resilience and adaptability. If the worst came to the worst…
…I would learn I had far fewer friends – but the ones that remained would be the true ones;
the ones who could see past my (ruined) social status to the genuine me beneath. If the worst
came to the worst… it would no longer be an option to follow
the safe, respectable, prestigious path. With far less left to lose, I would at last be
granted the opportunity to explore the riskier, yet more fulfilling occupations I had always
somewhere hankered for but been too socially-anxious to try. If the worst came to the worst…
…I would learn to measure my self-worth
by my own standards rather than the whims and applause of the crowd. I would grow a
sense of self independent of the verdicts of others. If the worst came to the worst…
…I would look with new admiration and humility
at the unhurried calm, natural stoicism and resilience of animals. If the worst came to
the worst…I would learn to contemplate my sorrows
from the vantage point of a distant nebula and would recognise my life as the petty and
insignificant thing it truly is and always was. If the worst came to the worst…
…I would develop appropriate gratitude for every apparently minor thing – and every
day that unfolded without further catastrophe would be recognised as the blessing it truly
is. If the worst came to the worst …I would understand that life was
not something that could ever be moulded into a wholly flawless and error-free entity – but
is an always imperfect, necessarily wonky cobbled-together construction, full of marks
and blemishes – which nevertheless possess their own beauty and dignity. If the worst
came to the worst …I would learn to distinguish between what
is really serious and worth lamenting and what is only ever a passing nuisance. I would,
in so many situations, be infinitely calmer. If the worst came to the worst
…my failure would embolden others to share stories of their own sadness, confusion and
humilliation and we would, together, face up to the suffering we so often, currently, unfairly, endure alone.
If the worst came to the worst… I would see that the struggle for fame,
money and success was only ever a doomed attempt to compensate for an unconditional love that
was longed for but denied in childhood. Worldly craving would give way to melancholy and mourning.
to the worst … I’d cease to be so scared of looking within – and
might, perhaps, one day give psychotherapy a go.
If the worst came to the worst …I would play the saddest songs that have
been waiting, in the wings, for me all this time.
If the worst came to the worst
…truly the worst, then all the rage, grief, anxiety and fear would be at an end – and
we would, at last, as the prayers so beautifully put it, be at peace. Our cheerful despair
badge serves as an elegant reminder of the art of cheerful despair during hard times.
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