The best way to start writing is to stop watching videos.
The second one is maybe to stop being in videos.
Yep, but I also – but that’s a joke but as Freud said there are no jokes.
There is no substitute for uninterrupted time for the, you know, not the killing your darlings
thing of killing your favorite lines but killing your distractions first.
And then hearing yourself talk honestly and hearing the way in which – or for me at
least hearing the way that ideas are framed in speech give me a sense of how they might
be framed on the page.
Even if people feel like they’re not fluent on the page or on the screen or on the screen
that we still call a page.
They probably speak with less um’s and ah’s and oh’s than I do sometimes.
And but primarily I think that the real question is what are you writing for.
And I don’t mean knowing your audience because you can never know your audience.
And if you actually want to write well your goal should be that your audience is inconceivable
to you.
So what I mean is know what you’re trying to find of yourself from what you’re writing.
I think most people are stuck because they are either trying to find another person in
what they’re writing or they’re not even sure what they are – they’re not even
sure why they are hurting themselves so badly.
You know writing is a very strange thing because it is – it’s not the messy thing that
you give to children in kindergarten like paints where you can smear it everywhere.
Or like when they give a bunch of kindergarteners xylophones and they drive everyone crazy,
right.
Because it requires a little bit more education, right, to make the same amount of noise let’s
say.
But writing then becomes the most basic way besides speech of communication.
And people do it very easily, right.
But then it also becomes the hardest thing to do.
And I actually tend to think about it like when I go to the zoo which honestly has probably
been twice in the last ten years.
But when you go to the zoo and you watch animals fuck.
Can you say that on this?
You can watch them have sex and you’re like oh, that’s easy.
Now there are obviously different rules in the animal kingdom, or none.
But it’s thinking like oh, if only it were so simple, right.
And I think that getting in touch with some of those honestly instincts that are animal
inside of us like rage, resentment, the strength that comes from fear will always again make
good writing and life bad.
If I knew who or what my audience is, was, will be then I’m not writing, I’m calculating
which is a, which I mean in the way we kind of use the word calculating.
But also meaning that kind of good old American confidence man huckster sense, you know.
I’m reckoning up intended effects, interpretations.
I’m weighing what people are going to read in certain ways as irony, as offensive, as
anodyne, as prurient, as “honest” right.
And first of all there’s the, there’s just the fact that all of these ideals are
normative within generations, you know, and change, right.
So we already know that all of these things that I’m sort of calculating to are going
to be utterly upended by a younger generation that’s going to consider me old and passé
and worthless.
There is though the hope that if you write with a certain openness to moods and states
of mind that make you feel uncomfortable those might be portents of future inconceivable
moods which then would really be understood by future inconceivable audiences.
I mean that’s the gamble you take or that’s the gamble I would like to take which is to
say to put myself in a position where I am unsure as to how something will be received
and maybe unsure as to what something is.
But there’s something in the – there’s some integrity in the language or there’s
some integrity in the playing out of the thought however disconcerting it might be sometimes
to me or bewildering.
There is something in those states of discomfort and of discomfort presented with linguistic
integrity that sort of makes be believe that someone will read me and know how to explain
that mood to me, right.
Someone will read me and know how to explain that impulse to me.
I think so much of my life which is inseparable from my writing is about trying to find explanations
for certain impulses.
And that’s what I think what a future audience might give.
But of course, you know, there’s hope just not for us, right.
You’re never going to be around to have it all, smooth it out for you.