I wish for Film Theory to cross 20 million subscribers.
Sorry Matt, can’t do it. What? Why?
Listen, the wand did a little farty noise thing so it’s against Da Rules.
Ahh, Fine. I wish for a good Morbius movie. Nope. Against Rule #101.
I wish for another season of Gravity Falls? Nope. Rule #3-15-4-5.
Fine. You left me no choice. I'm just going to have to prove that there are no rules,
that they're all an elaborate conspiracy to keep stock image fairies like you in check.
Say psych right now. I will not say psych
right now, sir. Da Rules are a lie! and I'm about to prove it.
Hello Internet! Welcome to Film Theory, EddCrouseFairy can't grant my wish for 20
million subscribers, but you can. Cast your magic on that subscribe button. You know,
one of the classic nicktoons that I always thought flew under the radar was the Fairly Oddparents.
This show was unhinged in all the best ways.
And why not? It's a show about a little boy named Timmy Turner
with two fairy godparents that can grant his every wish. Sounds awesome.
Or I suppose not every wish. You see, the fairy godparents do have some limitations
on what wishes they can and can't grant. All of which are outlined in
a magical legal document known simply as Da Rules. In fact, the show goes to great lengths to explain
the rigorous training that fairy godparents have to endure so that Da Rules never get broken. And
that makes sense, right? Every magic system has to have rules. Three wishes for a genie,
no wishing for more wishes, no making people fall in love. All the classic stuff. So the
world of the Fairly Oddparents shouldn't be that different, right? Right? Well, you know,
when I start asking rhetorical questions like that, it's because the answer probably isn't as
obvious as it seems. Nope, loyal theorist. After watching the show, maybe a little bit too intently
for a children's cartoon. It's become clear to me that Da Rules are actually more like Da Big
Fat Lies. Lies perpetuated by a muscle bound guardian, preparing the fairy world for war.
Don't believe me? Grab your wands, your wings and floaty crown things. It's time to wish for
some answers. So first, let's set some context. What's exactly in Da Rules?
As I just talked about, Da Rules are a collection of guidelines that
determine what wishes a fairy godparent can and can't grant their godkids. On the
surface. A lot of the rules make perfect sense. Fairies can't grant a wish that intentionally
kills or hurt someone. No wishes for money, no wishes that interfere with love, no wishes
that help cheat in competitions, no wishes for anyone except the godchild. And above all else,
a godchild must never, ever reveal the existence of their fairies to anyone else. Otherwise they're
going to lose their fairies, their memories, and reverse every wish they've ever had.
It’s a pretty harsh system. But then again, it seems sensible for upholding the structure
of this magical world. We're told in the show that a fairy’s primary purpose is to bring joy,
and Da Rules help prevent any wishes that might result in a net negative of joy. Plus, to help
make sure that the godkid doesn't unintentionally break a rule, there are safeguards in place.
The wish won't get granted and instead the fairy’s wand dims, wilts and then makes a fart sound.
In general, it seems safe to say that Da Rules are fundamental to fairy society,
with Da first rules having been drafted long ago by the Council, four ancient and powerful
fairies that rule over the fairy world. But Da Rules also seem to be a living document,
with new rules getting added all the time. For instance, you cannot wish for every day to be
Christmas, which got added after Timmy wished for exactly that and things got messy in a hurry.
But the more you watch the show, the more something feels… off about Da Rules. Some of them
are just nonsensical, like magic can't be used on invisible teachers, sleeping clowns, French
New-Wave filmmakers, and anyone who wears clear glasses as a fashion statement. It's certainly
weird for sure, but it's not bad. Others are just simply inconvenient, like the fact that breakfast
related wishes are denied after 10:30 a.m. But then there are the rules that are just flat
out dangerous. For example, fairies must always attempt to grant the wishes of their godchildren,
even if they just offhandedly say “I wish”. Doesn't even matter if they're conscious or not.
On top of that, there are these massive loopholes in Da Rules
that Timmy often demonstrates throughout the show.
This then becomes a huge problem in one episode with Timmy making all sorts of
rule breaking wishes for money to win multiple reality show competitions and for his crush to
fall in love with him. He later writes that no fairy godkids have to follow Da
Rules either, thereby causing Da Rules to almost self-destruct and destroy the entire universe.
It's pretty horrifying right? So Da Rules then are clearly responsible
for holding together the fabric of reality. And yet that just flat out isn't true. See,
magic and wish granting aren’t powers that are exclusive to fairies in this
world and throughout the series, we see other magical creatures completely ignore basic,
fundamental principles. Take, for instance, the anti-fairies who are all about causing bad luck
and pain in ways that break Da Rules. There are also genies who basically
don't follow any rules. Even their limit on three wishes isn't real.
Some humans have also gained the ability to wield magic like the Wizard, Merlin,
and all he uses his powers for is to help his nephew Arthur win competitions and become royalty,
a direct violation of Da Rule against cheating.
Then there are the Pixies who are just as magical as the fairies, but treat magic
as a business. All of their wish granting is seen as transactional with bureaucratic
rules and red tape that controls everything. And yet, just like any good corrupt businessman,
the powerful ones aren't above bending and breaking their own rules to get ahead. During
a minigolf competition that's subject to important contractual obligations,
several Pixies break Da Rules and cheat to help the head pixie win.
And yet, despite all of this rule breaking the universe stays intact. But okay, maybe that's
just other creatures breaking Da Rules. Maybe fairies operate by a different
form of logic, or a different code of magic. Maybe their magic is different and disconnected from the
rest. Well, that's not true either. First of all, Timmy and his fairies break Da Rules all the time
to the point where we could literally be here all day if I just wanted to list out examples,
just for the sake of showing some work, here are a few. In Ruled Out, Timmy wishes his parents
couldn't care less about him. Violating Da Rule against interfering with love. In I Dream of
Cosmo, Cosmo hits his head and briefly believes that he's become a weenie. That's part witch,
part genie. He proceeds then to grant several rule breaking wishes to Timmy's dad,
including wishing for money, thereby breaking the rule and counterfeiting. Da Rule against cheating
in competitions? Yeah. That one’s basically broken every other episode, like in Foul Balled,
Super Bike, Movie Magic, just to name a few. That last one actually is my favorite example of rule
breaking because Cosmo literally rips a page out of his copy of Da Rules that forbids him
from helping Timmy, thereby implying that fairies can basically ignore any rule if they so choose.
But perhaps the most egregious example of breaking Da Rules is mentioned in Hassle
in the Castle. When it's revealed to Cosmo and Wanda's most infamous former godkid…
Yeah. Even without wishing directly for the death of the Archduke, World War 1 caused 20
million deaths and 21 million injuries. I would say that that one caused a net
negative of joy. So, something suspicious is going on with these rules. These things
are supposedly super important, unbreakable, potentially world ending, and yet, they’re
broken all the time. Therefore they're a lie. I've proven my thesis. Film Theory becomes Film
Fact. Thanks, everyone. Let's wrap it early. Slap a dark truth in big ol’ red text on a thumbnail
and ship it. Well, Not quite. Sure, at this point we've proven that Da Rules are full of lies and
you can break them pretty much whenever you want. But we're still left with one major question: why?
If these things aren't real and they're not being enforced consistently, then why
are they here at all? It can't possibly be because it's a cartoon for children,
and breaking Da Rules would make for easily manufactured drama. No, no, that's not it. See,
the more I kept watching and digging into the lore of the series, everything started
to point back to one person, the one magical creature in control of both Da Rules and the
Fairy World writ large: Jorgen von Strangle. Self-proclaimed toughest fairy in the universe.
Jorgen is a major supporting character in the series, the guardian of Da Rules
who knows them by heart so he can properly enforce them. He's also in charge of training
fairies at his fairy academy boot camp, as well as assigning godparents to new godkids
who need joy in their life. Basically, he's the fairy general of the fairy army.
But if he's such a pro of the fairy world, why is he propping up this book of lies? Well,
everything starts to click into place thanks to two episodes. First, there’s School’s Out
The Musical, where the Pixies attempt to take over the fairy world. Remember these guys?
They’re the magical creatures that are obsessed with destroying joy and whimsy and replacing it
with contracts, boredom and rules. Yeah, it's a bit suspicious, isn't it? In this episode,
the Pixies find a sad infant clown named Flappy Bob, and they enact a 37 year anti
fun plan acting as Flappy Bob's own godparents for decades. But instead of granting him every wish
for clownish fun, they mold him into a boring Harvard Law educated businessman. Meanwhile,
the Pixies trick Timmy into wishing that kids were in charge of the Earth in
retaliation against all their rules and laws. But here's the problem, with the kids now in
charge every fairy godparent is pulled back into Fairy World because the kids no longer need them.
And Da Rules also state that if Pixies are the last magical creatures on Earth,
they're granted control over the planet. Which is exactly what happens. Has to be
one of the worst case scenarios for the fairies, who basically only exist to bring joy to others.
This sequence of events raises a ton of questions. If fairies are kicked off the earth if kids are
suddenly in charge, why isn't wishing for that something that's explicitly listed
in Da Rules? Meanwhile, all of this happened only because Flappy Bob was never granted a fairy
godparent. Clearly, he was miserable during his childhood, and yet he got a Pixie for some reason.
Why? Timmy was assigned Cosmo and Wanda because he didn't want to
do chores. I think an orphaned clown having the circus pummeled out of him,
might be just a little bit higher on the priority list. Most importantly of all, though,
how did Jorgen not see any of this coming? Remember, Jorgen is the custodian of Da Rules,
he knows them inside and out, and yet he does basically nothing the hundreds of times that we
see them getting broken throughout the show. And as the trainer and assigner of new godparents,
he should have known how miserable Flappy Bob was during his childhood and done something about it.
Jorgen also isn't surprised when the Pixies reference that obscure loophole that gives
them control of earth in Da Rules. So he clearly knows that it exists.
And as the guardian of the master copy of Da Rules, he's one of the only people
who can change them as he pleases. So this should have been something that he rectified
well before it became a problem. So why didn't he? Why is Jorgen lying about Da Rules? Well,
Jorgen didn't stop this precisely because he did see it coming. He wanted this to happen. He wanted
the fairies pulled back into the fairy world. It's all part of a larger plan. At first I thought that
maybe Jorgen wasn't actually a fairy, but instead some sort of undercover pixie on the inside.
I mean, he loves rules and enforcing them, just like the Pixies.
But we learned definitively in the season seven episode Cosmo Rules
that he's actually Cosmo's cousin, thereby proving that he's a fairy.
So what then is his deal? Well, it all comes down to that second episode I mentioned earlier
and then left unexplained until now for dramatic effect. You see, the last piece
of the puzzle that brings everything together is the Season six finale Wishology. Here we
learn that fairies weren't always the sweet, cute, cuddly creatures that we know of today.
Basically, fairies were once a race of super soldiers at war with a force known as the
Darkness, which was only defeated when thousands of fairy warriors combined their powers to create
a neutralizing light. And even then, the fairy council prophesied that the Darkness
would one day return. They sent millions of the strongest fairy warriors out into the void of
space to create an early warning system for Fairy World should the darkness ever return.
According to the lore of the series, that's exactly why there are stars in the sky. All
those stars, they're fairies on the lookout. Now, that's a cool story and all, but just think
about its implications. Fairy World must have been devastated by this war with the Darkness,
if millions of them were sent into space at the end of the fighting just to be a warning
system. And that's not even thinking about how many died during combat, their population has
clearly dwindled to a point where the entirety of Fairy World can fit inside of a gumball machine.
And it's not like fairies reproduce quickly either. In FairlyOdd Baby Cosmo and Wanda's
child Poof is born. And we learn that the last fairy child born before Poof was Cosmo himself.
And yet in the Past and the Furious we meet Cosmo and Wanda's very first godchild,
the caveman credited with inventing the wheel. That means that, at minimum, another new fairy
hasn't been born since at least the Paleolithic era. 40,000 years ago. Even the fairy economy
seems to be suffering, unable to fill positions in vital public services like law enforcement. T
And so Jorgen did what he thought he needed to do. He created a sham
system that would eventually result in kids losing their fairies and those fairies then
having to return to the fairy world. For centuries, he's been tweaking Da Rules,
trying to create a situation where the godkids of earth mess up so badly that the godparents have no
choice but to abandon them. That's why he allowed the Pixies to exploit the loophole. After kids
become the dominant species on earth, he's happy to pull all those fairies back to Fairy World.
In the episode, we see them being put to work in real jobs that can help rebuild
their infrastructure. He wants the fairies back to rebuild their population. Remember, before Poof
Cosmo was the last fairy child born and he's older than the entirety of human civilization. In short,
when humans came into being, production of new fairies stopped. And without the need to train
godparents, there's a perfect excuse to turn the fairy academy into an actual fairy army
boot camp. Jorgen knows that the Darkness is going to return. And he's been spending his entire life
preparing for it. That's why his physique is so much more like the fairy warriors of
old and why he immediately takes charge of the entire Fairy World when the darkness returns,
sending all the other fairies to be protected in a gumball machine as he tries his best to fight
back. He begrudgingly teams up with Timmy, someone he loathes, even sacrifices himself to make sure
that Timmy can save the fairy world. That is his primary goal, no matter the cost. And here's the
thing: his plan seems to work. Timmy is able to dispel the Darkness by showing it love, thereby
turning it towards kindness. And towards the end of the series, we learn that there's a shortage
of fairy godparents, partially because fairies have begun pursuing careers within Fairy World.
That said, Jorgen's plan didn't work well enough.
We still had to suffer through all those episodes with the Dog Fairy.
But hey, if you want something that breaks Da Rules of our world, you should check out our
sponsor for today's episode, Air Up. the bottle that will completely change the way you drink
water by hacking your brain. If you've been watching any of the Theorists channels lately,
you already know how this works because I talk about these awesome bottles every chance I get.
But if not, Air Up uses scent to trick your brain into thinking that the regular old water you're
drinking is packed with flavor. And it's not using fairy godparent magic for it. It's using
real science. So how does it work? Well, you may not realize this, but our sense of smell
and taste are connected. And what you smell ultimately influences what you taste. Air Up
uses these little flavor pods that hook up onto the straw. When you activate the pod and sip,
air bubbles carry the scent flavor through the straw and into your mouth, thereby tricking your
brain. It's not like juice or a flavored powder mixed in or anything like that. It is just water
with added smell. Basically, imagine that you wished for everything that you drank to taste
more delicious, all without adding any calories or chemicals or whatever. And that right there
is Air Up. When I first found air up and told the team about it, they were understandably skeptical.
But then one of our theorists, Mr. Creative Director for Film Theory here, Lee, bought one
and also started raving about it too. And just like that, the dominos fell. And now basically
everyone on the team has themselves one. And we've been getting them for our IRL friends and family
too. My personal favorite is Wild Berry, but Lee has been vouching for the orange vanilla. If you
want to change the way you drink water forever, click the link down in our description below to
get 10% off your entire Air Up order using the code FT10. Super simple. No complex codes this
time. Again, that is the letters F, T and the number 10 for a 10% discount on your order.