Hey babe.
White woman
Yeah? OMG check this out.
What is this? So, I don't understand why people think this is so hilarious but it has gone like
totally viral. Viral? Hmph, I will determine that it's viral or not. Let's take a look at this.
How do you hit the play button. It's this one. Hello my name is Uncle Roger. Today I will
react to a video sent to me by a fan. It's the BBC good food how to make egg fried rice video. What is
BBC? Let me see. Is it like something dirty like big black. Oh it's the British broadcasting corporation.
Okay, okay that BBC is okay. Uncle Roger not into the other BBC. Let's play the video.
What is this? Why are you making me watch this? Uncle Kumaar already knows how to make fried rice.
In Malaysia I tell you we have shrimp fried rice, egg fried rice, beef fried rice,
chicken fried rice, nasi goreng, all the same. why do I need to learn this kind of thing? Just watch it.
Egg fried rice don't be afraid this is really simple. It's cheap, it's delicious, really satisfying.
Don't be afraid. Don't be afraid. Who afraid of egg fried rice? Is the most common dish.
Everybody eats egg fried rice. Who afraid? Why are you afraid of egg fried rice? Where are your courage.
Uncle Roger scared ghost. But you scared egg fried rice. Failure. I agree with Mr Roger here.
Why does she need to be afraid of egg fried rice? If you are afraid of ghosts, or you're
afraid of some robber, or if you're afraid of your mother-in-law, I understand. Egg fried rice. Why
do you need to be afraid of that? This is really simple it's cheap it's delicious really satisfying.
And it's like a takeaway but you haven't paid eight quid for it. Who paid eight pound for take
away egg fried rice? My god. They think money grow on tree paying eight pound for egg fried rice. Hiyah.
Eight pounds that actually sounds really cheap I mean my pumpkin spice latte and scone
cost less than that. Cheap you're telling me this is cheap? In Malaysia
maximum I pay for fried rice is 6 ringgit. Nothing more than that. In America that is only 1.50 USD.
For eight pounds I can feed my entire family for three days. Eight pounds cheap it seems.
So a lot of people get afraid of cooking with rice. But you can follow a really simple rule which is
for every one part rice you have you need two parts water. It's as simple as that.
Why you measure water with cup? Just use finger. Finger. You put rice put water until finger first
joint. First joint the finger. That's how you measure the water. Not with British tea cup. Hiyah. First step
all wrong. Already I am not confident this video is gonna be good. Enough rice for around two people.
So now the rice is on. Wait, so you don't wash the rice? How you don't wash the rice just cook the
rice? Now the rice stinky like you. Where you learn how to make rice? Some white people cooking school
or something? Wait, why would she need to wash the rice? Would they sell you dirty rice? Ewww.
I'm just impressed she's cooking the rice on the stove. If it was me I would just get the microwave
rice, pop the bag of microwave, bam after a minute you have hot rice. Aiyo yo you are very lucky
Uncle Kumaar knows how to cook. If not, finish. Now the rice is on it's time to crack on with the eggs.
Oh haha crack on. I see what you're doing. So funny. So humorous. I dying laughing. I dead now.
I've got a frying pan here. Get that onto a medium heat, and then just add a little bit
of oil. So let that heat up. One. Okay egg in egg fried rice. I'm gonna try and do this one-handed.
Oh okay, that's pretty impressive. Pretty impressive I give you that. Cook it halfway. Once it's on a simmer
you want to cook it for around 10 minutes. You know what I don't like? Uncle Roger don't like
induction stove. You know those stove with no fire. Uncle Roger need the fire. Who use induction stove.
It's so lame. So not satisfying. You go camping you set up campfire. You don't set up camp induction
stove. Oh come everybody come come sit around this camp induction stove. Let's tell story. Let's make
marshmallow. This is true this lady have so much time. When you use an induction stove,
it will take forever for your food to cook. Why use an induction stove? Use a gas stove.
Your house might burn down, but at least you will have good food. That is all that matters.
Wang your eggs in. Wang what? What she say? What did she say? Wang your eggs in.
Wang your eggs in? Don't put wang anywhere near your egg fried rice. Don't wang anything
in the kitchen, okay? That's how I got fired from chinese restaurant. On to a plate leave it to one side.
Aye yo yo, why is this woman using yet another plate? Before this, she cracked egg in a bowl. Now
she fried eggs, she's putting it on the plate. Why are you making another, yet another plate
dirty. Is that necessary. To make egg fried rice you just put all the ingredients in one pan you cook.
One pan only you need to clean. Why are you using all these plates. It is not necessary at all. What
does that matter how many dishes she uses? You can just throw them all in the dishwasher after.
Okay. Okay rice, we are looking good. The rice not looking good. You lying to people. So wet. Drain
it straight. What's she doing? What you doing? Drain the... oh my god you're killing me woman. Hiyah. Drain
the... she's draining rice with colander. How can you drain rice with colander? This
is not pasta. I've never seen anyone drain rice. If your rice too wet, you *beep* don't bring colander
into your rice cooking. Hiyah. Get a nice rice cooker. Don't mess with sauce pan like this lady
here. Don't mess with colander. If your rice too wet you re-cook the rice. No way to save wet rice.
Mr. Roger I feel your pain la brother. What is this nonsense. Colander it seems. But one thing you got
wrong. This rice can still be saved i'm telling you. All you need to do is you need to steam the rice,
and it'll be okay. But why is this woman creating so much problem for herself?
There's quite a lot of starch in it which will make... What the what the hell?
What the hell. Uncle Roger so upset I put my leg down from chest. Why are you running water through?
You're ruining the rice. First you use colander to dry the rice, and then you put water. Then
why bother drying the rice. Who cook rice like this? How did this woman get on BBC food?
They never asked Uncle Roger. Uncle Roger teach master class on making rice. But this woman.
Colander on the rice. Then water through the rice. This is ohh...ohh.
Uncle Roger sad now.
Wait I don't understand. What is wrong here? I mean she said she's just removing the starch
from the rice. Who wants starchy food? And she's cooling it down. What is wrong with that?This
woman is destroying the rice. Why do you need to run it down with water? For fried rice you need
dry rice. Dry rice will absorb the flavor. Why do you need wet rice? Are you trying to make porridge?
Okay now. And then just add your garlic and ginger. Garlic, ginger okay classic. Classic asian
seasoning, okay. This one okay. And then you want to put all the other ingredients in.
Rice. Oh the sad gloopy rice that ran through colander. The egg. The spring onions.
and... Okay... Peas.
And then you just want to stir it all together and cook it through.
About three to five minutes. This look okay, but look too healthy. Where your msg? You don't use
MSG how to make good egg fried rice? It's just white people egg fire rice. MSG is the king of
flavor. If you said in life use MSG. If you happy in life use MSG. Put MSG in everything. It'll turn it
better. You just get a baby, put MSG on baby. You'll get better baby, smarter. How is that too
healthy? It needs way more vegetables in it. You need to put some kale in there.
And oh my gosh, you should also eat it and drink a glass of kombucha.
MSG is good, Uncle Kumaar endorses. But I tell you MSG is only for when you are lazy.
If you are hard working like Uncle Kumaar you don't need MSG.
What you need is flavor. All you need to do is you add sambal. You add the chili sauce,
you add the chili powder. You add the curry powder. You add soy sauce. And you add black pepper.
You will have the best fried rice in the world, I guarantee you that.
It already has so much garlic in it, it's gonna be way too spicy. Whoo can't even handle that.
It's done. Time to plate up. The colors are still vibrant. Oh my god no no no.
You're using metal to scrape your sauce pan. Hiyah. This is nonstick saucepan. Cannot use metal. Aye yo.
Your parents never teach you? If I use metal on saucepan at home growing up I would be disowned.
No more parents. Why are you orphan? I use metal on saucepan, Mom don't want me anymore. Very few things
break asian people heart. One is when your rice run out. Number two is when you scrape pan with
metal spoon. First my wife leave me, now you scraped pan with metal. Hiyah.
Uncle Roger wanna suicide. That is why I say use a wok. Put the wok on the fire.
With the wok you can use a spoon, you can use a knife, even if you want you can use a shovel
to scoop the fried rice, not a problem. The wok I tell you it is indestructible.
I mean I would have actually used a fork. A fork is the best way to eat rice.
I'm very proud of myself. Why are you proud of yourself?
You.. You messed up everything. You scraped saucepan with metal, dry the rice and wet
the rice and dry the rice in colander. You don't use MSG. Why this woman proud of herself?
Egg fried rice, uncle roger know how to make egg fried rice and Uncle Roger three years old
And this lady, I don't know 34, making egg fried rice on induction hob. I'm so proud of myself
Mr Roger, you are a good man. Thank you for sharing your thoughts on this video. Now many
many many people will know truth about fried rice. Thanks i guess. I have decided this video
viral