"At the age of five, I was molested at the church
my family has been members of for over 50 years.
He told me to never tell anyone and I'd be sinning if I did."
What is your biggest secret?
"During my teenage years of depression,
I got involved with the psychotic and obsessive guy that abused, threatened, and blackmailed me.
I swore if I had the money,
I would have hired someone to kill him
to relieve me of the nightmare I lived in."
"My father died 14 years ago,
but I still add his number to my contacts list every time I get a new phone"
"I'm addicted to porn."
"I am Christian.
But sometimes I get terrified that this is all that there is."
I'm
not
religious or affiliated with any religion.
But we all have that similar feeling and I have that same feeling that you, your eyes open all of a sudden;
'This is where you are and this is all that you have.'
And that's scary.
"I don't think much about leaving,
but I do fantasize about what my life would be like.
If I didn't get married at 21.
Have two children before 25.
Or quit teaching because more money needed to come in."
"When mom told me you had killed yourself.
I was so relieved I would never have to tell you I'm gay."
umm..
First of all as a person who is gay,
when I was in high school, I worked on a suicide hotline for three years.
I don't want anybody to ever feel relieved that I mean what I gathered from this is that a parent took their own life..
like to be relieved.
That's a lot of...
turmoil.
I feel for them.
"I love my dad,
but wish he would get a DUI (Driving Under The Influence) just once."
Yeah, I think that's always really hard when you have a parent and you feel like that parent..
isn't as responsible you might like them to be.
I think you can still love someone, but wish them to step up.
I think that's like a perfectly plausible...
thing to ask.
"My best friend died
because of me.
I'm 19
and..
I met her in a children's depression hospital after an attempted suicide.
A day after she contacted me and for some reason; I- I didn't reply.
I was scrolling through my instagram feed.
I clicked their icon and read the comments,
'RIP'
'miss you so much'
It was.., then I knew I had killed someone I love."
This situation hits me.
It hits-it hits me so deeply and -and almost instantly.
It's a subtle reminder that the influence that you leave on somebody could be eternal.
There's power and...
your presence is power in your influence power, there's power in who you are.