[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
>>> SO THIS MORNING WE'RE
TALKING TO COUPLES WHO HAVE MADE
A COMMITMENT TO BUILDING A LIFE
TOGETHER BUT MONOGAMY IS NOT
PART OF THE PICTURE.
JOE AND HIS WIFE STARTED DATING
WHEN THEY WERE 21.
NOW THEY'RE HUSBAND AND WIFE AND
THEY HAVE A DAUGHTER TOGETHER.
THEY EACH ALSO HAVE LONG-TERM
PARTNERS OUTSIDE OF THEIR
MARRIAGE.
THE FOUR OF THEM WILL JOIN US IN
A MOMENT, BUT FIRST A LOOK AT
THEIR UNCONVENTIONAL APPROACH TO
LOVE.
>> I WASN'T REALLY INSPIRED BY
MONOGAMY.
I WAS MORE INSPIRED BY THIS
OTHER WAY OF THINKING ABOUT LOVE
AND PARTNERSHIP.
SO WE STARTED IN AN OPEN
RELATIONSHIP AND WERE THAT WAY
FOR TWO YEARS.
DID TWO YEARS MONOGAMY, TWO
YEARS BROKEN UP, AND THEN WE GOT
BACK TOGETHER AND GOT ENGAGED
RIGHT AWAY KNOWING THAT WE
WANTED TO HAVE AN OPEN MARRIAGE.
>> THERE WASN'T A MENTOR OR
OBVIOUS EXAMPLES SO THERE WAS A
LOT OF FIGURING OUT OURSELVES.
I THINK WE DID A PRETTY GOOD JOB
CONSIDERING, FOR SURE.
>> AFTER THREE YEARS OF AN OPEN
MARRIAGE, ZALIE MET BLAKE AND
JOE LATER MET ITZY.
>> I FOUND OUT SHE WAS MARRIED
PROBABLY THE SECOND OR THIRD
TIME THAT WE'D MET AND I'D
ALREADY BEEN INTERESTED IN HER.
AND THEN SHE WENT UP AND TALKED
ABOUT HER MARRIAGE AND HER OPEN
MARRIAGE, SO IT WAS INTERESTING
TO NOTICE MY REACTION IN BEING
LIKE, WOW, THIS WOMAN IS MARRIED
BUT SHE MIGHT STILL BE AVAILABLE
IN SOME WAY.
>> I KNEW HE WAS IMMEDIATELY
MARRIED BECAUSE I SAW THIS LIKE
BIG WEDDING RING ON HIS HAND.
SO I REMEMBER THINKING, OKAY,
HE'S REALLY MARRIED.
THE NEXT DAY OUR MUTUAL FRIEND
SAYS YOU SHOULD GO ON A DATE
WITH JOE.
I SAID WHAT?
HE SAID, WELL, HE'S IN AN OPEN
MARRIAGE.
I SAID OH, OKAY, GOT IT.
EVEN THOUGH I ACTUALLY HAD NOT
BEEN DATING MONOGAMOUSLY MYSELF
FOR A COUPLE YEARS, I WAS A
LITTLE BIT INTIMIDATED BY THE
THOUGHT OF DATING A MARRIED MAN
WITH A CHILD.
SO ONCE I WAS REALLY READY, THEN
WE GOT TOGETHER.
>> PEOPLE THINK THAT THIS IS AN
ESCAPE FROM COMMITMENT, BUT I
THINK IT'S REALLY THE OPPOSITE.
WE HAVE TO AGREE TO BE BRAVE FOR
EACH OTHER.
>> WE ALL SHINE OUR LIGHT ON
DIFFERENT PEOPLE FROM OUR ANGLE,
AND, YOU KNOW, BLAKE HAS HIS
ANGLE.
AND THAT SHINES LIGHT ON
DIFFERENT PARTS OF ZALIE AND
THAT'S WONDERFUL.
I WANT, YOU KNOW, HER TO BE
FULLY ILLUMINATED.
>> I THINK IT ALSO REQUIRES THAT
YOU ARE HAPPY THAT SOMEONE YOU
LOVE IS HAPPY.
EVEN IF IT'S NOT COMING FROM
YOU.
>> IF YOU JUST IMAGINE AN
EVERYDAY PERSON IN A
RELATIONSHIP AND YOU'RE LETTING
THIS MAN BARGE INTO YOUR
RELATIONSHIP THAT LIKE
CHALLENGES YOUR MANHOOD, I'M NO
LESS OF A MAN AND IN FACT MORE
OF A MAN FOR HAVING THE
CONFIDENCE IN MY RELATIONSHIP
THAT IT'S NOT A THREAT, THIS IS
ALL GOOD.
IT'S MADE EVERYTHING BETTER.
>> WE ALL TRUST THAT WE'RE GOOD
PEOPLE.
WE DON'T WANT TO HURT EACH
OTHER.
AND WE JUST CHOOSE NOT TO SPEND
OUR ENERGY WORRYING ABOUT THESE,
LIKE, FAKE PROBLEMS THAT MIGHT
HAPPEN OR MIGHT NOT.
AND IF THEY DO, TRUST THAT WE
WILL TAKE THEM ON AS A TEAM.
>> AFTER THE BREAK, I SIT DOWN
WITH THE FOUR OF THEM TO HEAR
MORE ABOUT THEIR APPROACH TO
LOVE.
DON'T GO AWAY.