To delete your ex, or not to delete your ex, that is the question…
In this video, I’m going to talk about a dilemma that many people are faced with after
a break up, and that’s whether or not to delete or “unfriend” your ex from your
Facebook, Twitter, and other social media accounts.
My name is Brad Browning, by the way, and I’m a relationship coach and breakup expert
from Vancouver, Canada.
You may have heard about my best selling “Ex Factor” program, which is specifically designed
to help folks like you deal with a breakup and get their exes back.
So, now that you know who I am, let’s get into it.
Should you delete your ex from your social media?
The short answer is no, and that’s because if there is even the slightest possibility
that you want your ex to be apart of your life again someday, you should not delete
or unfollow them.
Maybe you’ve heard about the ‘no contact’ strategy that I advocate in my Ex Factor Guide
program.
For those of you who haven’t, the no contact phase is a period of time after a breakup
where you have no communication with your ex whatsoever.
This means no calls, texts, late night visits, liking their Facebook posts or showing up
at their door.
The general idea behind it is to give your ex a taste of life without you.
If he or she is like most people, then they’ll quickly start to miss you and the negative
memories that caused your ex to break up with you in the first place will fade away and
be replaced by nostalgia and the more positive aspects of the relationship.
Once these feelings have peaked, your ex will be much more likely to respond to your attempts
to rebuild a new relationship together.
So how are you supposed to comply to the no contact rule and still have your ex on your
Facebook or Twitter accounts?
Well, it’s not easy, but it is possible.
You need to understand that if you are actively practicing the no contact period as a way
to get your ex back, then facebook stalking them is not acceptable.
This may sound harsh, but it’s really for your own good.
Do you really want to be checking in on who they are hanging out with, or trying to read
between the lines of their status updates?
For example, let’s say that they post about how happy they are feeling today, it’s likely
that you’re going to question why they are happy and create scenarios in for yourself.
Maybe they met someone new, or could they be thinking about me?
It’s not healthy to do this type of overanalyzing.
Let’s say that you want to keep an eye on what they’re doing and who they’re talking
to.
This may seem reasonable, but the truth is that in the long run this will only hurt you
and your progress with resetting yourself, and it could also easily become obsessive
and draining.
Forget what your ex is doing and focus on your own actions, because that’s what’s
actually going to help you win them back.
Instead of deleting your ex altogether, simply go to your account settings and choose to
not include your ex in your newsfeeds.
Out of sight, out of mind.
If you don’t trust yourself to stay away from their profiles and decide that deleting
them would be easier than avoiding them, then you need to consider how awkward it will be
when you’re working towards getting back together and need to send them a new friend
request.
Do you want to put yourself through that... especially if your ex has been avoiding your
profile and didn’t even realize that you deleted them in the first place.
There’s another reason not to “unfriend” or delete your ex from social media, and that’s
because it can actually be a very effective tool to win them back… by using a sneaky
tactic that I call “Covert Jealousy,” you leverage social media to help change the
way your ex feels about you and the possibility of getting back together.
I can’t explain this tactic in depth here in this video, but you can learn more about
using social media and “Covert Jealousy” in the free full-length video on my website,
BreakupBrad.com.
On the flip side of things, if your ex unfriends you don’t panic; it’s more than likely
because they don’t want to be continually reminded of you every time they log in to
Facebook or Twitter.
So don’t sweat it; it’s inconvenient but it’s not a big deal and it certainly doesn't
mean they hate you or that all hope is lost.
Keep your head up and remember that every day you push through the no contact phase
gets you closer to recovery, and possibly rekindling your relationship with your now
ex.
Well, I hope this video helps you figure out whether or not you should delete or unfriend
your ex on your social media accounts… but, if you do have any questions still buzzing
around in your head, about this please feel free to share them in the comments section
below and I’ll do my best to answer them.
Well that’s all for now… thanks for watching, see you soon!