When it comes to small screen couples, there are virtually no rules as to who might hook
up with whom.
Remember that time Tony Soprano slept with his Russian mistresses' one-legged cousin?
Or when the tough interrogator Sayid and the spoiled rich girl Shannon became such a surprisingly
satisfying pair on Lost?
Anything can and does happen when it comes to TV romances, but that doesn't mean it's
always okay.
In the case of these on-screen couples, the ick factor stemmed from their significant
age differences, which made them nearly unwatchable at times.
Gloria and Jay
Though Modern Family has been credited with breaking new ground on television, the romance
between Gloria and Jay has been accused of retreating behind familiar stereotypes.
Ed O'Neill's Jay was an aging businessman who had a caustic relationship with his ex;
and Sofia Vergara's Gloria was a single mother who was happy to take on the mantle of trophy
wife for the sake of financial security.
"35 years we were together and he couldn't wait 10 minutes to run off with Charo.
That's a joke, joke.
I'm kidding."
There's almost three decades of an age difference between O'Neill and Vergara, and although
they have a good time working together in real life, certain moments of romance between
the two can be a little unsettling to watch.
"And it makes me uncomfortable."
The redeeming factor of their relationship is that the rest of the family has been allowed
to mock the lopsided couple mercilessly over the years.
"I know what she thinks, a coal digger."
"You know she's saying gold digger right?"
"YES, Phil!"
Carrie and Aleksandr Petrovsky
The relationships portrayed on Sex and the City could hardly be considered traditional
— remember Samantha's naked sushi rejection?
Yeah, it was a weird show.
But in terms of uncomfortable age gaps, Carrie Bradshaw took the cake with her strange patriarchal
attraction to Aleksandr Petrovsky, the Russian artist.
Bradshaw spent an entire series falling in and out of love with men who were all wrong
for her, but Petrovsky was one of the worst.
He was emotionally needy and distant at the same time, and undermined her career achievements
for the sake of pumping his own ego.
The fact that he treated her more like a neglected daughter than a true partner made their age
gap that much more awkward to watch unfold.
"I think you're acting like a child."
"And I think you're acting like an ---hole."
Detectives Andy Sipowicz and Connie McDowell
No matter the scenario, watching NYPD Blue's Sipowicz get it on with Connie was always
going to be uncomfortable.
Beyond the relationship's physical mismatch, the psychology behind it was also questionable.
McDowell and Sipowicz bonded over her struggle to reconnect with the daughter she was forced
to give up, as McDowell's maternal yearning attracted her to Sipowicz, a grieving widower
and single dad to a young son.
Even the showrunners knew it would be hard for audiences to swallow.
Executive producer Bill Clark told the Los Angeles Times that making Sipowicz and McDowell
hook up on the show was "like walking onto a minefield."
"Think about something else.
It'll pass."
Debra and Lundy
The unusual relationship between Debra and Lundy on Dexter was actually pretty well-regarded
by fans who, at that point in the series, were just ready for Deb to have any stable
relationship.
Yes, Lundy was old enough to be her father, and yes, he was sort of a superior officer,
but at least he wasn't secretly gift-wrapping severed body parts and leaving them all over
Miami.
That we know of.
Hannah and Joshua
HBO's Girls was brimming with bad relationships, especially for Lena Dunham's leading character
Hannah.
But while most of her hook-ups were age appropriate, one episode portrayed her bizarre and unlikely
two-day romance with an older man named Dr. Joshua.
The two got together after Hannah followed him to his house, and they were in full horizontal
mambo mode within minutes -- with all the deep talk between the two coming later.
They split up almost as quickly as they got together, but the idea that a middle-aged
doctor wouldn't hesitate to bed a twenty-something with no notice was tired tripe, at best.
Blanche and Dirk
Though she was the self-professed "man crazy" one out of all of the roommates on The Golden
Girls, Blanche only had one romantic encounter with a notably younger man.
In one episode, Blanche, who has never revealed her true age, was asked to dinner by her Jazzercise
instructor Dirk, and of course the awkward conversations started flowing.
Not only did he tell her she reminded him of his mother, but Blanche's descriptions
of their torrid affair were especially unsettling.
"I have decided to overlook that minor detail and succumb to the Vesuvius of passion that
is about to erupt from me."
"Stand back, we're going to get something on us."
That is as close to hearing your grandma describe having sex as you'd ever want to get.
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