Yo what it do?
This week we gettin EVEN with The Count of Monte Cristo by Alexandre Dumas.
Edmond Dantes got it made.
1.
Soon he gonna start runnin his own ship like a
boss, and 2. he bout to tie the knot with his bangin hunny Mercedes.
But whenever a playa ballin relentless, you can bet they gonna be a pack of haters tryna
trip up his game.
Danglars be jealous of his career blowin up, Fernand eye-fu**in Mercedes’ sweet ass on
the reg, and Caderousse just hatin cuz haters gonna hate.
So these three lil bitches write a letter claimin Edmond a traitor, even though
our true blue sailor as straight as they come.
Even the law man Villefort takes a big ol’ dump on Edmond.
Since Villefort’s daddy an anti-royalists snitch, he gotta make sure errybody think
he on the up and up.
So Edmund gets thrown in prison with no trial.
While he doin dat hard time, Edmond meets a prisoner named Faria.
He learns Edmond real good and tells him that there be a swoel fortune stashed away on the
island of Monte Cristo.
And when they scott free, dem playas gonna be sittin FAT.
Thing is, old man Faria snuffs it before errythings all kristal and benzes; so Edmond hides in
his body- bad, escapes dat trap, and flows over to Monte Criso Island.
Time to make it rain, son!
Later, Edmond finds out that girl Mercedes married Fernand after his disappearance.
SKANK!
With all dat fast money in tow, Edmond buys himself a new name,
does a few good deeds on the DL, and vows to use the rest of dat paper to fu** some
haters UP.
STREET JUSTICE!
First up in Caderrouse whose dumbass tries to rob Monte Cristo.
sh** goes south when his greedy ass gets shanked.
One down.
Hater numba 2 is Fernand.
By slangin dat cash, Da Count digs up enough
dirt to WRECK Fernand and his family.
Seems ol Ferny got hood rich by betraying royalty and sellin two peeps in to slavery.
Along with all of high society, Mercedes and his boy Albert chunk deuce to Daddy F and
and dat chump ices himself.
Another down..
Next on the sh**list is Villefort.
Word is that Villefort’s biddy got beef with some of her family, so da Count MC teaches
her how to slay homies by slippin some poision in they joose.
As she droppin em one by one, MC not only gets this sucka called our in front of errybody,
but also gets him to convince his wife to KILL HERSELF.
COLD BLOODED.
When Villefort drops from top dawg to bottom bitch, fool loses his mind.
One to go.
They ain’t nothin Danglars love more than his paper.
So that’s exactly what the Count fu**s with.
After jackin up his cashflow, the Count sicks the mob on Danglars’s
ass and robs him of every single dime he got.
But it ain’t all dat ruthless, couz.
Our boy helps out Maximillian, the son of an old homie.
He be hollerin at Villefort’s daughter and the count steps in to hook a brotha up.
After dat, the Count rides off in to the sunset with a hunny named Haydee all up on his nuts.
What a motherfu**in pimp.
Peep this motif, blood.
This book off da heezy with the number of storm and
dark cloud images bein slung up in hurr.
Like when Edmond finds out he bout to get fu**ed by Villefort, before he meets Faria
up in the clink, right after Fernand gets put in his place, I could go on playa!
After gettin wrecked by them three haters, a storm be brewin in our boy’s soul.
And who can blame him?
Like a bolt of lightning, Edmond’s righteous livin’
falls to sh** in a muthafu**in FLASH.
And Edmond ain’t the only one.
Check what Villefort say about his daddy.
Bad sh** can come at any time.
And when it do, it don’t give no warning, it
just happens from one second to da next.
Matter of fact, my day one brutha Herodotus layin dat same game in his Histories:
But happiness is too good for deez haterz.
A split-second of pain when dat hot lead goes through their dome ain’t enough.
Edmond don’t wanna just ghost them fools- he gotta make feel the pain he been feelin.
But you gotz to be careful when you comin out dat hard.
After Edmond peeps Villefort’s wife and son layin stiff, he start tweakin and realize
he mighta taken this whole revenge game a little too far.
Cuz like Franz say;
Make sure yo drafts go down smooth by hittin subscribe and checkin out my store.
Peace yall!