LET'S GET RIGHT INTO THE NEWS.
OF COURSE THERE WAS ANOTHER BIG PRESIDENTIAL DEBATE LAST NIGHT.
I'M NOT SURE HOW MANY OF YOU WATCHED IT BUT I KNOW ONE PERSON
WHO DEFINITELY DID.
BECAUSE THIS MORNING PRESIDENT TRUMP TWEETED THIS REVIEW.
CRAZY, CHAOTIC DEMOCRAT DEBATE LAST NIGHT.
MINI MIKE WAS WEAK AND UNSTEADY, POCAHONTAS WAS MEAN MOSTLY AT
CRAZY BERNIE AND MINI MIKE, STEYER WAS A DISASTER.
POOR TOM STEYER, HE PUT MILLIONS OF DOLLARS OF HIS OWN MONEY INTO
HIS CAMPAIGN AND HE STILL CAN'T GET TRUMP TO GIVE HIM A
NICKNAME.
(LAUGHTER) I DON'T KNOW IF YOU NOTICED BUT
IN THAT TWEET TRUMP ALSO TRIED TO INSULT ELIZABETH WARREN BY
CALLING HER A CHOKER BUT HE WROTE THEY DON'T KNOW HOW TO
HANDLE HER BUT I KNOW SHE IS A CHOCKER.
HE ALMOST GOT TA THROUGH A WHOLE TWEET WITHOUT A SPELLING ERROR.
BUT AT THE LAST MINUTE HE CHOCKED.
(LAUGHTER) HE DOES HAVE A POINT.
THIS IS ACTUALLY WHAT A LOT VOTERS ARE SAYING ABOUT
ELIZABETH WARREN.
SHE TALKS THE TALK, CAN SHE CHOCK THE CHOCK.
IN OTHER PRIMARY NEWS ACCORDING TO REPORTS BILLIONAIRE MICHAEL
BLOOMBERG HIRED A BUNCH OF FORMER TELEVISION EXECUTIVES AS
ADVISORS IN PART TO GET LATE NIGHT HOSTS TO TALK FAVORABLY
ABOUT HIS CAMPAIGN IN THEIR MONOLOGUES.
(LAUGHTER) HAS MICHAEL BLOOMBERG SEEN THE
TYPE OF STORIES WE COVER ON THIS SHOW?
IF HE WANTS TO GET ON THE "LATE, LATE SHOW" THE BEST BET HE HAS
GOT IS TO GET HIS PENIS STUCK IN SOME SORT OF HOUSEHOLD OBJECT,
THEN WE MIGHT COVER IT.
I WOULD NEVER, EVER, UNDERMINE THE INTEGRITY OF THIS SHOW LIKE
THAT.
PLUS YOU DON'T NEED ME TO TELL THAT YOU MICHAEL BLOOMBERG IS
BRILLIANT, INCREDIBLY HANDSOME AND ACCORDING TO ALL ACCOUNTS, A
VERY GENEROUS LOVER.
(LAUGHTER) MOVING ON, IN OTHER NEWS, A
LOCAL WEATHER REPORTER FOR A NORTH CAROLINA TELEVISION
STATION DID A FACE BOORK LIVE REPORT-- FACEBOOK LIVE REPORT
FROM THE FIELD RECENTLY AND DIDN'T KNOW IT BUT HIS SELFIE
FILTERS WERE ACCIDENTALLY TURNED ON, RESULTING IN H DOING A
VERY SERIOUS NEWS REPORT LOOKING LIKE THIS, AND THIS.
AND THIS.
(LAUGHTER) THIS IS HOY ALL LOCAL NEWS
SHOULD BE REPORTED.
I THINK THESE FILTERS ARE A GOOD THING.
IT WOULD HAVE BEEN A LOT EASIER TO SIT THROUGH THE DE BAILT LAST
NIGHT IF IT LOOKED LIKE THIS.
(LAUGHTER)