Doctor B it is always so good to see you
here we are about to start yet another
school year with a ton of uncertainty.
It is so stressful on so many families.
Tell me what you're seeing in your practice.
Yeah, completely agree Christine.
I mean, I think all of us would agree.
It's been kind of a a quick short summer,
but it has been a long long year, hasn't it?
So back to school transitions are
tough for a lot of families in the
best of circumstances every year.
But this year in particular with
the pandemic, we are seeing really
high levels of stress right now.
OK, let's talk about some of the triggers
for kids when it comes to anxiety,
I thought it was so interesting.
You know, my youngest Kate
is kind of an old soul.
I told her I was talking to you today
and I said, do you have any questions
for Doctor B about anxiety and she goes?
Oh, I feel anxious all the time
and I'm like OK wait, what stop,
stop right there and but and so
I was like let's talk about it.
So I'm honestly you know,
diving into some of the
triggers is so important.
I imagine it is
and you know there there's two main triggers.
For anxiety, Christine that the first
one has to do with safety or separation
and after so many months of togetherness.
Yeah, there's a lot of kids right
now who are worried about leaving
the comfort zones of their homes.
You know they're worried if it's safe to do
this if it's safe to be around other people,
so that's one trigger the other trigger for
anxiety has to be the performance issues.
So after this many months of
not having a consistent routine,
I think it's natural to assume that
we're going to have some kids who
may have a harder time adapting back.
But I have some kids who worry
if they'll be able to do it.
Even if they did really well
before this pandemic hit us,
so those are the two main triggers,
but just like your daughter said,
let's face it right now.
There is just tension across the board,
so anxieties in the ear and kids
are picking up on that.
Doctor B that is just heartbreaking.
You know there's some kids who maybe are
more particularly vulnerable to anxiety.
What are you seeing and who are who
is this group I should say? Well,
I think we should start off and say
we've all gone through a year and a
half of really unusual challenges.
So the truth is, any child right now could
be feeling more worried or more tense.
But there are some kids are kids,
for example, who always had kind of an
anxious temperament or anxious tendency.
They may be more prone to worrying,
and then, you know, Christine,
there's some kids who,
during the pandemic and bring their
quarantine and virtual schooling
in some ways like a little bit
of that kids who are bullied in
school kids have social anxiety.
Kids are learning differences.
Uh, they may have preferred being
at home because there was a way
to work at their own pace and
within their own comfort zone.
So those are some kids that may be really
worried right now by pointing back.
OK,
so we need to keep an eye on those kids
as well as all of us. I mean, my gosh,
it's just so much to think about
and you got great tips for parents.
I mean how we can help our kids right now.
Yes, yes, and I think the first
thing to start with is go ahead
and validate their feelings.
We want to listen to our children,
want them to know that there's a safe space
for them to talk about their emotions,
and I think it's really important to
let them know that it is OK to not
be completely OK right now, right?
But that we are going to get through this
together, so that's the first thing to do.
I'd say the next thing to do
is is to really set the tone.
You know there's a lot of parents right now
who themselves are very anxious exactly,
and if you lead by anxiety,
you're going to fuel anxiety.
So check in with your own feelings before
you talk to your child and then stay calm.
Even keep an even tone and answer
their questions in a concise,
reassuring sort of way.
So that's really important to do as well.
And then I would say it helped
them to think positive.
You know, anxiety will make us.
What if the worst case scenarios so we got
a balance that out with low positive ITI.
So ask them what they're looking forward to.
Write school year starting as
completely wanna see it again.
Those sort of things so helping the child
thing positive is really important.
And then for those kids who
are worried about safety,
emphasized the safety measures.
Yeah,
let them know that schools have
been planning for months on
how to minimize their risk,
and that's why there are
certain rules now in place.
You know,
anxious kids like rules,
and they like plants that helps them
to feel more secure for the kids who
are worried about being away from home
practice separating take small steps
that help them to see that they can.
Sure enough, do this and it can be
more and more and more independent.
And then these last two points almost
sound like they're contradictory.
This train, but actually go together.
You want to have a predictable routine,
but you do want to encourage flexibility,
right?
So routine routine is like a safety net,
right?
It kind of minimizes the doubt
that goes through our minds,
but let's face it, there are no guarantees,
so we may have to suddenly switch gears.
Yeah,
but you want to say to your child
is there are adults that are
monitoring that at all times.
So if there is a change in circumstance,
we're going to switch gears
together as a family and as a
community. Absolutely, you know.
Now my my youngest.
Excuse my oldest who goes to private school.
She wasn't going to be wearing a mask,
but now it's changing by
the moment and I told her.
I said you have got to be flexible.
It's going to be OK.
You did it last year.
We can do it again.
And lastly,
how do we know if really we
should seek professional help?
Yeah,
it's a really important question.
If you have a child who's having
severe meltdowns or you have a child
who's excessively clingy or you have a
child who's having a really hard time
recovering from moments where where he
or she is feeling anxious or a child
that's hard to be beginning to school,
that's the time to seek the help
of a mental health professional.
Find a good therapist who works
with children with anxiety and
I'll tell you that therapist will
not only help their child,
but he or she will help the parent to
express their feelings and come up with
some really good coping strategies.
But I think the message you just gave
her daughter is really important.
We we've all gone through
a really difficult time,
but we are already survivors.
Yeah, we're gonna do this and we're gonna
do it together. Absolutely doctor B.
Thank you so much for your words
of wisdom. We so appreciate you.
Thank you so much for having
me on. I really enjoyed
being here. Thanks so much Doctor.
Bhargavi, some real calls to action there
for my family meeting tonight, alright?