[music playing]
Tomorrow is the Little Miss Prim and Perfect Pageant,
and the winner gets the greatest prize ever:
two season passes to Dairyland A-Moo-sement Park!
That's one for Lola and one for coach.
I've been working my butt off all week to make sure she wins.
Once we get to Dairyland, it'll all be worth it.
Get back here, Hops!
Lana, watch out!
Do you know how hard it is to steam clean chiffon?
Blah blah blah blah blah.
No!
Okay, minor setback. We can still win this thing.
Wake up and smell the hairspray, Lincoln. It's over!"
You can't just quit! We worked hard on this!"
There will be other pageants, you know.
But not with Dairyland tickets.
Lincoln, I need my beauty rest.
As your pal, Gil DeLily would say,
I can't recover if you're going to hover.
I can't believe I learned to French Braid for nothing.
Hey, Lincoln. You done with this? I could use the scrap metal for welding.
[gasping]
♪ Hallelujah ♪
Uh...why are you looking at me like that?
Lana, how would you like a season pass to Dairyland?
♪ Hallelujah ♪
Don't toy with me, Lincoln!
I'm not! All you have to do is one teensy, tiny, little thing.
What is it? I'll do anything!
You just have to take Lola's place in the Little Miss Prim and Perfect Pageant
and win.
Are you kidding me?! Bleh! Do you know who you're talking to?"
Someone who's going to love Dairyland's newest ride...
The Milk Shaker. It's so fast, you can barf, fly around a loop,
and get hit in the face with said barf.
Darn you, Lincoln! I am in!
But wait. What if Lola finds out?
You know what she's capable of.
[shivering]
She won't find out. I promise.
Bleh. First off, we gotta clean you up.
What is this weird sparkly towel?
It's called a dress, Lana. Now, hold still while I work my magic.
Ugh! It smells like princess farts!
[music playing]
Whoa. Look at those girls!
They're all so clean and sparkly.
Well, so are you. You're as good as any of them!
I didn't know this was going to be on TV.
Good thing we don't get the Princess Channel.
Thanks for getting me the Princess Channel, daddy!"
No problem, sweetie. It was either that or the Sports Channel,
and who needs that, huh?
[crying]
Whoa. Hang on, everybody! Loose floorboard!
That'll hold. Carry on!
What is going on?
No matter what I do, I can't be prim and perfect like these girls.
Maybe there's something wrong with me.
Wait. There's nothing wrong with you.
I'm the one who messed up.
I got so caught up in winning those tickets, I turned into Gil DeLily,
who, when you stop to think about it, probably needs to get a life.
Yeah, but still, why can't I be like them?"
Because you're you.
You're messy and muddy and keep a lot of reptiles in your pants.
But that's what makes you awesome.
And I was crazy to try and change you.
Why don't you go do your own talent?
"Really? Okay, but we can kiss those Dairyland tickets goodbye.
I don't care about them anymore. Go be yourself.
Whoo-hoo! That's my sister!
And this is your other sister!
Wait! It's my fault, not Lana's! It was all my idea!
[cheering]
I have worked four years
to build my pageant reputation!
And you just ruined it!
Lola! Listen.
Woohoo!
Lola! I'm so sorry I pretended to be you! Please don't be mad at me!
I don't like what you did, but you did win.
And I respect a winner.
Well, I've learned two very valuable lessons.
One: You should never try to turn someone into something they're not
And two: If you ever ride the Milk Shaker,
keep your mouth closed.
- Bleh! Ew! - Awesome!
My mouth was open!