As Girl Scouts start peddling those famous cookies again, you might pick up a few boxes
to support the cause — or completely re-stock your office snack supply for the desolate,
cookie-less months to come.
But these delicious treats pack more punch than you might expect!
From their not-so-secret ingredients, to their association with a certain recreational drug,
here's what to know before you throw down for those Thin Mints.
"Let's eat these damn cookies"
Same name, different cookie
Depending on where you live, you might be eating a different S'more than your neighbor
down the street.
That's because the Girl Scouts contracts two different bakeries to craft their cookies:
ABC Bakers and Little Brownie Bakers.
But it turns out that a side-by-side comparison reveals some pretty shocking differences in
cookies with the same name.
"This box looks identical to this one, but this is not the Do-si-do!
This is the Do-si-do"
The Girl Scouts explained to Business Insider why the cookies are different, saying,
"Having more than one baker allows us to have greater production capacity.
. . . During our busiest point in the season, our bakers make about 9 million Thin Mints
daily."
Let's be honest.
That non-answer won't stop us from eating whatever version is our local Samoa.
"Two caramel clumpies, and fifteen boxes of coconutties."
"Exactly, I'd like to see somebody else order that many cookies."
The big three
The Girl Scouts originally kicked things off with a simpler sugar cookie.
And ever since, they've added in variations that affect the changing lineup every year.
But if you're looking for cookies to count on, you've got 'em: Thin Mints, Peanut Butter
Patties (or, Do-si-dos), and Shortbread (or, Trefoil) cookies will always be there for
you.
"The thunder cookie"
Reigning mint-chocolate queen, Thin Mints, account for somewhere around a third of all
cookie sales.
And they're not going anywhere.
"You could always cram more cookies into your Blizzard."
"Get the Thin Mints!!!
Done."
Down to cookie business
Even though they're more expensive than grocery store brands, Girl Scout cookies raise cash
for a good cause.
But if you've ever wondered just where all that money goes, here's how the cookie crumbles.
According to the Girl Scouts' official website, 100 percent of the profits stay with the local
Girl Scout authority and the troops themselves.
"I'm a Girl Scout.
I have skills.
We're like adorable little Navy Seals"
But in 2014, CBS Minnesota broke down the price of a box of cookies, which was then
$4.
They found that $1.08 went to cookie production, 76 cents went to the Girl Scouts' volunteer
program, 61 cents went to scout camps, 49 cents went to leadership programs, and 22
cents went to the local administration.
That left about 84 cents going directly to the troop.
Rainforest Do-si-do
"I'll buy a cup, if you buy some of my delicious Girl Scout cookies.
Do we have a deal?"
"Are they made from real Girl Scouts?"
While Girl Scout cookies are far from being the only treat that uses palm oil, they have
been targeted for their continued use of it.
The reason?
Palm oil production companies in Southeast Asia have destroyed acres of precious rainforest
in order to plant palm oil plantations.
In 2015, Little Brownie Bakers claimed,
"We will continue to work with our suppliers . . . with a goal to get 100 percent segregated
sustainable palm oil when it becomes logistically and financially feasible."
Concerned scouts went right to the head of the Girl Scouts and got no response.
"What's happening?"
"They're not gonna help us Marsha, and you're not going to get Shakira either."
"Is that true?
No Shakira?"
As of 2017, the official Girl Scouts site acknowledges their continued use of palm oil.
While they say that they're moving toward sustainability, they say the oil maintains
the quality of their cookies.
"Mmm you don't know what you're missin"
The other "Girl Scout Cookies"
If you've ever wondered just what kind of cross-section of the population loves their
cookies, it might interest you to know that there's actually a strain of marijuana named
after them.
"That's Girl Scout Cookies."
"Excellent!"
Not only is the strain called Girl Scout Cookies, but varieties like "Thin Mints" are also on
theme.
Gizmodo found that if Girl Scout cookies have a reputation for being crazy addictive, Girl
Scout Cookies marijuana is the pot equivalent.
According to the site, some dispensaries stopped carrying it because it was too strong to have
any real therapeutic value.
But enough people were requesting it that they needed to stock the strain again, which
might sound familiar to the world's Thin Mint cookie fans.
D.I.Y. that cookie
No matter how many boxes you order, there are just never enough.
"Me so hungry for cookie."
But don't worry — you can make your favorite Girl Scout cookies at home, thanks to the
internet's obsession with hacking these treats.
And of course, you sure don't need an achievement badge to get a Girl Scout cookie oven of your
own.
"Here."
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