Hello, hi, I am sex and relationship coach Caitlin V
and today I'm coming at you with a short video
to ask a big question which is
do you really have erectile dysfunction?
A lot of men come to me who think that they have ED.
They think so, they're convinced that they have it.
They've even gotten prescriptions for Viagra and Cialis
like their doctor agrees that they have it,
but I am not so sure.
The reason for this is,
the many of these men are having erectile problems,
but they don't actually have
physical system erectile dysfunction.
There's a really important difference.
First, a disclaimer,
I hope it's obvious that I am not a doctor.
Well, I hope it's not obvious that I am not a doctor,
because trust me, there're doctors that look like me,
but I'm not one, okay.
I'm not a medical doctor,
I'm not a health care professional,
I'm not your healthcare professional.
So, you do need to get checked out
and obviously you should regardless get checked out.
If you think, there is something going on with your body,
go to the experts on bodies,
but consider this as well.
One of the major causes
of erectile dysfunction
in men across the world today is psychological
and if it's caused by something going on in here,
it's not something going wrong down here.
So, taking your pill, or portion,
or running electrical waves,
or getting an implantable device,
that all solves a physical problem,
but if it is not a physical problem.
Those are not the solutions.
I've seen men who literally
take Viagra and it has no effect on them,
because the mind is that strong.
Who am I not talking about.
I'm not talking about men
who have lifelong chronic diseases like diabetes.
I'm not talking about men
who have had a real physical injury
on their genitals,
in or around, or even to different parts of their body.
I'm not talking about men
who recently started a new prescription drug
to treat any sort of condition or cure a chronic.
I'm talking strictly about men
who stopped being able to get erections,
usually while they're having partnered sex.
I'm talking about men
who can still get an erection when they masturbate.
Who can still get an erection when they look at porn,
or can still get an erection
with their mistress or their side piece,
but with their wife, their primary, their main squeeze,
their dick is not answering the call, it's AWOL.
Their erection is MIA.
I am talking about men who are young,
who have healthy immune systems,
who never smoke, never drink,
who work out regularly,
who have excellent cardio vascular health,
and then suddenly something happens
where you can't get an erection
and you think that maybe that's
because your penis is broken.
I mean come on, it's your mind.
Your mind is the most powerful organ
when it comes to having sex
and comes to being aroused.
If you go through a horrible break up,
if someone says that you are an awful lover,
if you lose your job,
this is scientifically evidenced now.
That men that suddenly lose their job
or suffer a massive decrease in pay
are more likely to experience
premature ejaculation and erectile dysfunction.
If you have something that hurts your ego,
hurts your confidence,
hurts your stamina,
hurts your ability to perform,
hurts your ability to provide.
You are more likely to see that impacted
in your ability to get and maintain an erection.
Is this good new?
I think so.
Why am I sharing this with you?
Because listen, these medications,
they have side effects.
They're not cheap, number one.
They can be up to like $15 a pill with insurance, okay,
and I really truly believe that
you should save the ED meds
for when you are older, when you have a higher
rate of actual physical ED
in way way way older men.
So, if you're gonna have to take this
for...you know, once you start taking them,
if you're gonna have to take them for the rest of your life.
I think you might as well wait.
In my mind,
why start something that you have to do
every single time before you have sex,
when you are young and by young I mean like
under the age of 60,
under the age of 70.
I see men all the time getting prescribed
Viagra, Cialis,
those classes, those categories of drugs.
I see men taking all kinds of supplements
and like mysterious chemicals
that they order off the internet because they think
that there's something up with their body.
The truth is that
if you can get an erection in the morning when you wake up,
if you can get an erection when you masturbate to porn,
if you can get an erection on your own
when your partner is not around.
You don't have erectile dysfunction.
What you have is a challenge
or a problem in your relationship
and that my friends,
you are more likely to solve
by going to a therapist, a counselor,
a sex coach like myself
than any amount of medication
is actually gonna ever do anything for you.
Why did I make this video?
Because there's a lot of suffering out there.
Seriously, there are so many men who are panicked,
who spend so much of their day worrying
about their sexual performance.
That it's amazing that they are able to get anything done
like have jobs where they make money,
drive safely in traffic,
raise their families,
be great sons to their parents as they age.
I want you to have a really fulfilling life.
Sex is a huge part of that.
Especially when it's not going right.
When sex isn’t going right,
it's a huge energy drain.
It's like a black hole.
It takes all of your joy,
takes down all of your happiness.
When sex is going great,
for the most part,
you can handle the other stuff
that's happening in your life,
and you deserve a great sex life,
and you deserve to know that your body is capable
of giving you that great sex life.
But if you are not listening to your mind.
If you're not treating
whatever is going on in the relationship seriously
and taking care of that.
You know, dealing with the confidence, dealing with the esteem,
dealing with your worthiness, dealing with your job.
dealing with your boss, dealing with your body,
taking care of yourself.
I want that for you.
I don't just want it for you,
I know that you deserve it for yourself.
So, please if you think you have erectile dysfunction,
go to the doctor,
but be aware that
they are prescription happy sometimes.
They're really excited to just write something down on paper
and get you out the door
like it's gonna solve your problems forever.
If you want to be able to get and maintain
an erection during sex with your partner,
and there's no other reasonable cause of your ED,
no lifelong chronic disease,
no family history of chronic disease,
no cardio vascular problems,
no other injury to your body.
If you don't have a good reason for what's going on,
I'm begging you, apply to work with me
or go find someone in your area who's qualified
to help you do the work on your mind and on your psychology,
to figure out what's going on.
This message has been brought to you by
sex and relationship coach Caitlin V.
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