Hello, it's Mark here from Make Him Yours. And in a previous video, we talked about why
men cheat. So today I want to tell you how you can control the most important factor
from that video, unmet needs and how as a result you can stop or drastically reduce
the chance of cheating occurring in your relationship. Stay tuned.
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Welcome to the video. Now, there's never an excuse for cheating. I want to make that clear.
But there's always a reason and parts of these factors, we can control. So in the last video,
we talked about the five factors that contribute to a guy cheating and why men cheat - unmet
needs, fear of loss, genetic and upbringing, his values, and the impulsivity of his character.
Now some of these you don't have control over, and there are some relationships where you
just can't prevent cheating, but there's others where you can. And the fact is men cheat because
they want to fill some sort of need. Same reason women cheat. Some of these needs, you
have control over. So what I want to talk about today is the needs that you can meet.
And just in the way that you would want a man to meet your needs in a relationship,
you can meet his and as a result, completely prevent or drastically reduce the chances
of cheating occurring in your relationship.
The first need is to make him feel masculine. Feeling masculine isn't just important in
your relationship. It's essential to men's mental health. The fact is male suicide rate
is a lot higher than female suicide rate and a lot of scientists and psychologists put
this down to the fact that modern society isn't as congruent to men feeling like men
as old tribal societies used to be. A man needs to feel like a man for you. He needs
to feel like a protector and a provider and like he can just just do it for you. So maybe
it is letting him take the lead. Maybe it is showing him you have faith in him, trusting
him, letting him handle shit. A man wants to feel like he can be your man. It's not
just important to the health of your relationship. It's important to his own mental health.
The more you can facilitate that, the better things are going to be in your relationship
and this applies in the bedroom as well. This applies in the bedroom. When a man feels like
he can please you, when he feels like he can be your man, he can do it for you. He is going
to feel very validated by that. When you are in a relationship with him, you are the only
person who can validate him. You are his only source of good feelings as it relates to women.
See men, we're taught from evolution, from their minds that if they can't please a woman
if they can't attract a woman, then they aren't much of a man. So you want to always make
sure that you show him what he does to you, what he does for you, and that even when you're
not in the mood, even when you reject him, you find him attractive because he has no
one else to tell him that if enough times you sexually devalidate a man, you communicate
to him that you don't think he's much of a man inside or outside of the bedroom.
It's not to say he'll cheat straight away, but slowly but surely, chipping away at the
foundation of that relationship. Again, it's not an excuse for cheating, but it is a reason
it happens and it's a reason that is preventable. Number two, make him feel loved and appreciated.
The more loved and appreciated he feels, the better the relationship's going to feel for
him and the less likely he is to stray. In the same way that you want to feel loved and
appreciated and that if you don't, over enough time you're going to start to become resentful,
the same applies to him. You know, check out the book by Gary Chapman. Love languages.
Look at different ways you can make him feel loved and appreciated right throughout your
relationship. Number three, the need to feel worthy. Now this is an example of a need that
you don't have as much control over.
If you've ever heard the story of the slum boy and the princess, you'll know what I'm
talking about. The princess comes down from her castle on a parade and she meets a slum
boy and long story short, they fall in love. Eventually they have a, they have a relationship
in secret for a while, but eventually the slum boy ends up cheating on the princess
with another slum girl. Why would he do that? That's crazy, right? Deep down he didn't feel
worthy and in real life, men will cheat for this reason as well. Now, you can be the source
of a man's self-esteem. He has to source that for himself, but it does is something that
you can help him with and support him with. So you know you can show that you trust him.
You can rather than doing things for him, you can let him do them rather than pandering
to his insecurities.
You can let him face them and deal with them and all these things are going to grow his
self esteem and help him on the part of making sure that if you're a high value woman, he
still feels worthy of you. Again, not an excuse for cheating, but it is a reason and it's
a reason that you can have some control over. Number four, make him feel secure. Now as
a high value woman, you're going to be doing your own things some of the time. You're going
to be going out to events, you're going to be meeting people, you're going to be doing
all different things with your life and as a side effect of this, sometimes a man is
going to feel a little bit of space and he's going to feel a little bit insecure and that's
what's going to pull him into you and make him wanna keep chasing and keep respecting
you, keep being attracted to you.
But if you cross the line from sometimes he feels a bit insecure just because you're a
high value woman to I'm going to make him feel insecure. That's when you increase the
risk of cheating. If you are threatening to leave, if you're giving him reasons why the
two of you aren't compatible, if you are showing why you don't think the relationship will
work, essentially if you're being the more avoidant of the two, you're chipping away
at the foundation of security that guy has in the relationship. And the more insecure
he gets, the more likely he is to have a human factor play a part and go out and do something
stupid. So you never want to make a man intentionally feel insecure in the relationship or in the
connection with you. Yes, men will feel a little bit insecure as a side effect of you
just being awesome, but it should never cross the line where you're threatening to leave
or threatening the relationship because that will make a man very insecure and increases
the risk of some sort of cheating, bad thing happening.
The final need you can help a man meet that can lead to infidelity is variety or excitement.
And the fact is a lot of people do cheat and leave their relationship to fill this need.
And particularly, if your man is especially excitement driven, if he's very variety driven,
then you can know that and you can work together as a couple. You can vary up your sex, you
can do exciting adventures. There's all sorts of different things you can do together to
create that excitement and increase it in your relationship. And look, the fact is there
will be some men who are so variety driven that sadly, they simply can't get their needs
met by one woman. And if that's the case, you know, you can sit down and talk to him.
You guys can talk about bringing other people in or potentially ending things if that's
not something that you want to do, but at least it's a conversation about variety that
you have and it does prevent cheating occurring in your relationship.
Well that's it. Thanks for watching. You know, it'd be nice if we were all perfect and we
didn't have to have this conversation, but the fact is we are human and there are human
factors that play a part. And in the same way you would want a man to meet your needs
in the relationship, it's only fair that you also put effort into meeting his. These human
factors do play a part and the more effort we all put in you and your man put in to meeting
each other's needs, the less chance infidelity is going to occur. Thank you again for watching.
Make sure you subscribe. Hit the little bell so you get notifications when new videos are
up, and make sure you leave a comment as well. What did you think of today's content? I'd
love to hear your thoughts. What did you think of the needs? Have you experienced cheating
because of one of these needs? If so, why? I'd love to hear your thoughts, comments below.
Let me know what you think and don't forget to give the video a thumbs up as well. I'll
see you in the next video really soon.
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