- Now, I truly think that there is nothing more frustrating
to you sexy single ladies,
than when you're dating a guy for a few months,
that you're really (bleep) into
and you finally let your guard down
and maybe you even started telling your friends
or your parents about this person
and then out of nowhere, they disappear.
(fingers snap)
This video is for all you sexy single ladies,
that have had to deal with men ghosting
on you out of nowhere,
and here are three core strategies,
to keeping a man in your life.
Keep watching.
(dramatic electronic music)
- Hey there, Adam Lodolce here from SexyConfidence.com,
where I help you create your love story.
And this is all about how to keep a man
really interested engaged in a relationship.
Now, I should say before get into all this,
it goes really without saying but,
if a guy is totally uninterested in being
in a relationship with you then don't keep trying
to keep him interested, okay.
This video is instead, really just a reminder,
when you first start dating a guy,
some key behaviors you want to have
to really keep him engaged in what's going on,
and keep him interested
and wanting to continue pursuing you.
So here are the three ways to keep him pursuing you
and only you.
Number one, remember that you are worth keeping.
Now research shows that self-esteem can influence
your relationship satisfaction just as much
as it affects your partner's.
When you feel bad about yourself,
your insecurities can really start to creep in
to the way that you act with your significant other
and that can have a very negative impact on both of you.
Plus low self-esteem can distort your perception
of your partner.
According to research in
The Journal of Personality and Social Psychology,
in this study where they basically asked 500 men
and women to complete questionnaires about their self esteem
and then asked them how threatened they felt
by their partner's flaws,
they found that those with very low self esteem
were not only more threatened
by their partner's imperfection
but they were also more likely to view the relationship,
in very black or white terms.
Basically being like, it's either very good or very bad.
So in short, when you start to recognize your self worth
and realize that you bring so much to the relationship,
suddenly it can really keep a man much more engaged
and much more interested in the relationship.
When you realize that you have high value,
he's gonna realize that as well.
Number two.
Show him that he's also worth keeping.
This is all about just appreciating the little things
that he does for you.
Now this is incredibly condescending to men,
but I'm gonna say it anyway
because men are really just like puppies.
When we do something very good,
reward us with a treat and what do you know?
We're gonna continue with that behavior.
Now let's say you've just finished dinner
and you're walking back to the car
and he walks you to your car door
and opens the car door for you.
Now, a great way to appreciate him and his chivalry,
because we all know chivalry is almost dead nowadays.
Great way to do that is just give him a kiss
on the cheek and say,
wow, that's so sweet, guys never do that anymore.
From that point forward, he will never not open that door.
Give him that treat, if he does something well, reward him.
Or let's say he plans a really nice Friday night dinner out
with just the two of you.
Awesome, the next time you're together surprise him
with a really nice dinner back.
I've found that the best type of relationship
is really when both people are constantly investing more
and more in the relationship,
trying to make the other person more and more happy.
And according to research, giving in a relationship,
actually has an extra effect on the giver.
Those who care and give or help in an unsolicited manner,
feel actually more positive, more alive
and have actually higher self-esteem,
than those who are always taking.
And the more he gives to you,
the more committed he will be in the relationship
because we as people value something more
when we've invested or worked a lot to obtain it.
Finally, tip number three is please, don't stop flirting.
Now look, once you get past that kind of like,
three month to six month stage in the relationship,
you're probably going to lose that really intense,
butterflies in your stomach sensation
that you get every single time you see that person.
And in fact, research has shown
that there actually very different love chemicals
that are going on through the body
when you're in kind of like those early stages
of romance and excitement versus later on
when you're just deeply in love with someone.
But I wanna say this,
even though the love chemicals are very different,
you don't have necessarily,
that really intense nervous butterfly sensation
every time you see that person,
you want to still have that flirtatious banter
when you're going out.
And really set time to go out on dates,
and really try to step back into that time
when you were just starting to get to know each other again.
In fact, after one study we found,
they studies 164 married people
at the University of Kentucky,
the researcher basically noted
that most of the happy couples
that are doing really well in life
and were still together, continued to flirt.
They would either be playing footsies
or whispering in their partner's ears.
And this is really a way of maintaining
and emphasizing intimacy in a relationship.
And the researcher noted in her paper that married couples
that are really successful,
ultimately flirt to create this kind of private world
between the two of them.
So, I'd love to hear from you in the comments below.
Have you ever tried any of these techniques
to really keep someone interested
and engaged in the relationship?
Give me a yes or a no in the comments below,
I'd love to hear from you.
And also if you're finding yourself stuck
in casual relationships and you can't seem to find the guy
who is really interested in something more,
then I recommend a free training I have,
in the description of this video
or in the cards on this video,
go ahead and click that link, register for the training
and be able to learn how to make a man really miss you
and want to commit to you and only you.
And finally, don't forget to head on over
to SexyConfidence.com where I have a ton
of amazing resources that'll help you
through every single stage
of dating, love and relationships.
Finally, give this video a like, give it a subscribe
and I will speak to you, you sexy single lady next week.
Bye Bye.