With the innate ability to sniff out moods and motives from a mile away, INFJs tend to be
quite picky with who they surround themselves with. While they may feel obligated to give
certain people the benefit of the doubt, they remain cautious to the energies they let in,
whether they’re intentional or not..especially when it comes to these 8 types of people.
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Alright let’s jump right into it, starting with red-flag number 1:
People who only pay attention to people that will benefit them
If someone is being fake or just has a fake personality in general,
you can bet that the INFJ will notice before anyone else. This is especially true when
someone is trying to use fakery to wiggle their way to the top of a specific hierarchy.
The best example would be in an office or work setting,
aka the brown-nosers or but-kissers for lack of a better word. These are the people that only
seem to look like they’re doing something when the boss comes around. It’s as if they
have trained themselves to use fake conversations and relationships to get what they want in life.
They don’t spend any more time than they need to conversing with people on a lower or equal rank
to them, because they don’t see any benefits in such a connection. In fact, most of these types of
people are so used to using their time and energy to please the people that would in turn benefit
themselves in the long run that they don’t even realize they do it. Once an INFJ notices someone
like this type of person they can’t unsee it, leaving them no choice but to stay far, far away.
Number 2: Extreme people pleasers
Now, we all know that INFJs have certain people-pleasing qualities that come up,
especially on an emotional level. They want to ensure everyone is satisfied and on the same
page before making any decisions that involve others, however, extreme people pleasers tend to
have a totally different motive. Similar to people who only pay attention to those of higher power,
these people-pleasers don’t only try to impress the big guys, they try to impress everyone they
cross paths with because it’s in their nature to seem more put together than the average person.
They will tell anyone what they want to hear to their face,
despite thinking the complete opposite - which makes getting to know the real them so difficult.
When conversing with this type of extreme people-pleaser, it’s as if they’re
auto-pilot replies are just repeats from previous conversations, lacking authenticity and genuinity.
Number 3: People who pretend to not be bothered by things
You know the people that just seem overly happy, witty, and satisfied with life?
Ya.. it’s usually not the case, and INFJs can usually recognize that underlying dissatisfaction
they refuse to bring to the surface. This type of person has tendencies of pretending
not to be bothered by things that actually bother them a lot. These are the people that claim they
hardly ever get mad or frustrated at things, or that they and their spouse never fight.
Things that you wish were true, but are just a little hard to believe. Sure..some people
have an uncanny sense of composure in life, but everyone gets a little ticked off once
in a while. It’s difficult to get these people to relate to any of the so-called down sides in life,
because their overly passive manner makes it seem like they’re living a fairytale.
Most of the time INFJs can sense that these people usually have a hard time processing emotions in
front of other people because their persona comes first above all else. Yet, when they are alone,
their thoughts can become overwhelmed with emotions that they are hesitant to process.
Number 4: People who are only around when it’s convenient for them
Friendships aren’t easy, and it’s not fair to judge someone based on the amount of free
time they’re able to give.. Luckily, INFJs know that first hand. However
INFJs also notice when a particular person tends to show up only when they’re in need of something.
Maybe it’s just an open ear, a shoulder to cry on, or a serious favor. It’s as if the
connection goes dormant for long periods of time, and then randomly sparks back up when
it’s most convenient for the other person. It’s like they’ll ask how you’ve been,
only to follow up with asking if you’re available to help them with something. Unfortunately, INFJs
can specifically become targets of this type of connection because they’re always willing to help,
and won’t force a connection once it’s gone inactive. Yet, on the bright side of things,
it doesn't take an INFJ long to connect the dots, and once the dots are connected.. See ya!
Number 5: People who overstep boundaries
So.. there’s the people that only call when they need a hand, and then there's the people that just
can’t get enough of the INFJ and what they have to offer. While it may be absolutely harmless,
people who show up uninvited, follow them around at work, invite themselves to plans, or
expect more than the INFJ is willing to give are all considered red-flags to the INFJ.
If someone can’t recognize the importance of personal space and time, you can bet
this introverted type will attempt to distance themselves more and more, in hopes that they’ll
get the social cue. And if it gets bad enough, the INFJ will be brought to a place of needing to use
stern communication for the sake of their mental sanity, which can be seriously uncomfortable.
Number 6: People who gossip and look down upon others
We’re all guilty of it on some level. In fact, talking about other people is a natural human
tendency that allows us to learn through other people’s positive and negative experiences.
However, gossiping about and belittling people almost always comes with ill-intent.
This type of person usually uses this method to subconsciously divert attention off of
themselves and their insecurities and onto other people. They may try to showcase their
morals and opinions within the gossip, in hope to get a rise out of the opposing audience.
For example, if a mother was crying in a grocery store because her child was having a tantrum,
this type of person could say something along the lines of
‘I hate when parents cry in front of their kids, that mom needs to keep it together’.
By saying this, they are expecting you to not only agree, but to also praise them for their so-called
empathy towards the child. When in reality, they have no idea what it’s like to be a mother,
or to deal with a tantrum! Plus, this type of person won’t stop when it comes to people closest
to them, so INFJs know that they’re probably being talked about to other people as well!
Number 7: People who are hot and cold
Smiley and giggly one minute, and then dead-faced the next. It’s difficult to constantly keep
up with this persona, and if an INFJ is around this type of person for long enough,
they will easily be able to notice their small breaks in character.
Since INFJs long for harmonious relationships, and try to avoid people’s unpredictable emotions,
emotional maturity is a must-have when making new connections. Especially considering their
energy-absorbing tendencies, INFJs can actually feel these mood swings within themselves
if they stick around for long enough. And although this type of behavior usually stems
from extreme insecurity of themselves and their lives, being polite one minute and rude the next
doesn’t help anyone. In fact, once an INFJ begins to notice when these people finally
do crack their characters, even if it’s for a brief moment, they’ll get a glance of the beast
being tamed behind the fake smiles and ingenuine compliments. INFJs can deal
with all sorts of emotions from others, but unpredictability will affect them everytime.
And lastly,
Number 8: People who lie and cheat
Lying and cheating aren’t exactly considered favorable attributes in most people’s eyes, but
for the INFJ who can sense these shortcomings from a mile away, they tend to be even more
annoying. Whether it’s a grandiose claim that seems a little too far fetched, or minor fibs,
INFJs just can’t wrap their heads around trying to portray yourself as someone you’re not.
Habitual liars may even feel slightly threatened by the INFJ’s blunt honesty and ability to pick
up on subtle details. However, when INFJs are caught in a conversation where they or
someone else are being lied to or manipulated, this personality type can even start to panic
because although they despise deceit, they also try to avoid conflict at all costs,
leaving them in a limbo of knowing what action is the appropriate one in the moment.
This empathetic personality type prides themselves on being as honest as possible,
with a great set of morals to become a positive force in the world, so lying and cheating are
especially irritating for an INFJ because they can’t relate to the motive behind it.
Well, that’s it for today, PSYCH-Os. Before you go, let us know in the comments below of a time
that you came across one of these 8 people, and how you cut-ties. Also, make sure to leave us a
like, share with your friends and also subscribe to our channel so that you never miss a video!