Hey guys! Welcome to another episode of Ask TSL, and today...
We are dressed in really festive colours!
I am feeling the Chinese New Year (CNY) spirit already!
So we asked you guys to leave us some situations
that you'll face during the CNY period
or questions that you do not know how to answer.
And we will give you our not-so-professional, professional advice. You understand?
That's right. In one word, not professional.
Yeh. So are we ready to start?
Let's go!
Whooo! Wah! Eh! Wah Ang Pow!
Eh wah! Very thick you know! Money! Money!
(Ang Pow) thick is not good news.
Because thick means inside only have $2 notes. All $2!
This one, I put aside. I put here lah. Ah! It's not even $2.
There's no money at all!
Okay! First question.
This is a very common question.
I think even in Secondary school right,
people have already been asking me this.
My parents do not want me to be in a relationship yet,
yet all the Aunties and Uncles are already asking me.
Just be truthful. Let's say if you need time, you just say you need time.
Tell them...
I need time.
If you want to focus on your career,
Just tell your grandma that.
Or right, just twist the question back to them.
You ask like
Then after that, their old grandmother story will come out.
Then you just "Orh. Orh. Orh."
Then it's time to go to another house. "Bye!"
So yes. Either be truthful or siam (avoid).
You take the question, you...
Shoot it back! Understand or not. That's right!
Yeah man. Next question!
It's been a long time since I threw it. Wah.
Yeah, I was gonna say that.
Wah! I feel like when you throw, I need to HUAT ah!
HUAT AH!!!
Okay!
Wah!
This relative of yours is very competitive.
For me, I tell you. I am a very calm person.
When I say calm, I mean with every situation that happens in my life,
I will try to not make it (become of) bad blood.
I will try to not make it so awkward.
In chinese, there is an idiom that goes...
I cannot tell you! The gods will strike the earth with lightning if I do.
This is a secret. Then they will be like...
Then you just walk away.
Oh yes! Smart! Right!
You see, try not to make things awkward. Correct?
But of course, you can also be like me when I rage.
Come!
When I read it, I thought it was directed at me.
But it's not.
It was just one of the... It's fated!
No what!
Yah Bolin. What if they ask you this?
No, no, no, no. I know you're losing weight.
And I know you have lost weight already, but what if they ask?
I think our relatives, or our grandma, grandpa will be more concerned
if you are skinny than if you are fat.
They are like...
They will say this kind of stuff.
But if they say "Why are you getting fatter?"
Then you simply tell them...
Because in Chinese terms...
Means there's a lot of good fortune.
So just use that as an excuse.
There was a year where some of my relatives said I grew fatter.
They didn't use the word fat.
They just say...
You have more meat already!
Then I was like "HUH! Really ah!"
Then they will say,
"Oh no, no, no, no. Good... You need to put on more weight. You're too skinny already."
Then I was like "Orh... Okay loh" Smart! Smart!
"Thank you. Thank you."
If you react very aggressively, like "HUH!"
They will tell you "No! But it's nice!"
Then you say "Okay, thank you." and walk away. Wah! You damn smart.
You don't even need to say anything, you just "HUH!"
They will be like "Oh no, no, no. You're not fat, you're not fat. Okay, you're not fat."
It's good, it's good! Nicer! Wah! Very smart, very smart!
Come! This one is truly professional advice already.
We just keep on throwing out idioms until one person cannot.
I'll just give you a handful of idioms which older people love to hear.
Because they want money.
Because they want to stay young and pretty or handsome.
Because they want a career.
We're done! We have covered all aspects.
Don't exaggerate these idioms.
Such as,
You know try to bullshit their way through.
Or if let's say your relative is a bit fat or skinny, please don't say...
Don't say this ah! Never!
Okay, next!
In the first place, will you open the ang pow in front of them?
You should NOT!
But okay, I am telling you ah.
If your family have a lot of grandchildren, a lot of cousins here and there...
Walao, $2 per person!
Still have to give to your parents, cousins. Cousin's cousin.
You need to give everyone!
So if you got $2 ah, I tell you. You must be grateful. Yah.
At least it's not a freaking coin. Understand? Correct.
You all don't understand how the married people feel. Yeah.
We have to give out a lot of money.
Sigh. Why we know? Because we are at the marriageable age.
Later my grandmother ask me,
why I haven't get married?
Okay, there, there. Okay, okay. You got $2. It's okay.
See, see, see? It's okay! You got money.
This is the tip! Understand?
Yeah! Got money!
Alright man. Next question!
This is as if you take the ball, but you don't throw it back.
You throw it to the side.
So it's like, "How much did you score?"
Err not bad lah. Which tuition does your son goes to?
I would like to go too.
Oh smart!
At the same time, they feel good because they'll feel like
"Wah! You asking me for advice now."
If let's say, you cannot think of anymore questions,
find another target.
Eh! Jennifer!
How's your score! Yah! What did you get ah!
Then auntie will go "Oh yah! What you get ah?"
Then you faster sneak away. Yah. Done.
Yeh man... Beautiful!
Okay, this is a very awkward situation.
Let's say they really ask this question.
You just feel embarrassed once and make the rest of CNY good.
How? Let's say you are the...
Don't know what.
Oh my God, can!
Or even better right... you just admit that you don't remember.
"Oh ya. Who are you ah? What's your name?"
Then you go "Oh ya!"
"No lah, because you became prettier!" or "You became more handsome!"
"You look different. That's why I don't recognize you."
You must really pull this off really well.
Because I might just be testing people when they use that tactic.
Let's say if I ask you. Mmm. Because I might just be testing people when they use that antic.
Let's say if I ask you.
Hey! Do you remember my name?
Err... No leh...
Oh... I'm Bolin, remember?
Oh yah! Bolin! Yah.
Aiya, no you grew even taller, that's why I don't recognize you.
Oh my God.
Actually we have never met before.
Alright! Next!
I feel it really depends on how open-minded your relatives or family is.
Let's say if your family members are more narrow-minded...
You just say "Oh no lah. I haven't meet the right one yet."
Yah. That's the best lah.
But if they are quite open-minded, then you can slowly say...
Then slowly let them know, if they are open-minded.
If they are not, I think it is best to just take a step back
and just say that you are finding. Yah. Just say you are finding the one.
Yeah man. Cause the one can be anyone.
Anyway, you do not have to worry so much.
You only see them one a year mah. Correct? Oh that's true.
But for closer relatives, the ones which you see every weekend,
then CNY is the big weekend.
You will have to strategize and slowly let them know.
But if you only see them once a year, just say "Oh finding loh."
Eh! How's the bee hoon ah?
That's it! That's it!
It's always about the bee hoon!
Okay, next question and it's also the last one! Last one!
How ah? Really eh.
During the CNY period is when everybody is very interested in your love life and your life.
I would suggest ah... The standard stuff.
So if you are like very, very young, then use that as your excuse.
Yah, no lah. We still young. We still got a lot of time.
So we want to honeymoon first.
Or you can use finances as your excuse.
Oh I want my kids to have the best life.
So I don't want to rush things out you know.
Eat the bee hoon.
Wah damn kaypo eh. All these people.
Yah! So anyway ah, for those people who don't have these issues
but you know that you are the one who always asks these kind of questions,
you better wake up your idea. Understand or not?
PLEASE STOP! YES!
Just enjoy the snacks, enjoy the bee hoon.
You want to ask ah, you ask something else lah.
For example?
All right! So that is the end!
Hopefully, this CNY,
you will face zero issues.
Yes, smooth your way through. And you can grab the ball,
and then pass it away like you are doing taichi.
Hopefully, the ball won't even go to you,
but instead, more ang pows will go to you. Correct.
Thank you guys for watching this episode of Ask TSL.
If you have any more questions you want ask us to answer,
you can comment down below and we will try our best
to answer everything for you. That's right.
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