[Music]
you
Oh bully and here I thought I was gonna
be the last guest who arrived my friends
call me the colonel you're welcome to do
the same should it please you but uh
after you
ah Bonjour welcome to markiplier man
your invitation please very good very
good
right this way good luck at the table
tonight I shall fetch you a drink
forthwith oh there you are old friend
how are you settling into your new
office now I know it'll take some
getting used to but there's no one I
would rather have alongside me to
protect this great city of ours now I'll
see you at the table soon but try not to
rob me blind again we'll catch up
if you looking for udders
I'll get him when I'm good and ready but
still the kitchen now now let's not be
rude to our guests so sorry about them
here's your champagne enjoy your evening
welcome welcome one and all my name is
Mark Clark thank you for joining me on
this auspicious evening so good to be
surrounded by such a close friends now
this evening it's not all about the
poker it's not all about me to drink up
and be married life is for the living
who knows
[Laughter]
[Music]
ah good morning hope you've had a good
night's rest
I've prepared for you a Seltzer with
cocaine best thing for the morning after
if you ask me ah there's our little
monster you really knocked him dead last
night
I haven't seen you go wild like that
since our days at University good to let
the beast out every once in a while they
old friend and again I'm still not
exactly sure as to what we're supposed
to be celebrating here I mean it's good
to have the gang back together but how
did the blue like this seems anyway now
is not the time to become conspiratorial
life is asked to choose as I always say
I have some work to finish but I'll meet
you at breakfast we'll all catch up soon
[Music]
oh my god oh my god murder did you hell
happened here who's in charge around
here
trick question that guy and he's dead
now
which makes me in charge so you better
listen up good bucko case you haven't
been paying attention there's been a bit
of a killin and you're my prime suspect
so you better get to explain him right
quick as to the what where when and why
you happen to be here upon this man's
death bodies caught he's been dead a
while a likely story that I happen to
believe completely alright you're off
the hook for now but I'm a detective
oh yeah prove your real dick
here's my badge [ __ ] those are my old
partners don't ask me about them fine
I'll tell you each one of them died each
death more tragic than the last a few of
them even died in ironically hilarious
ways which made it all the more tragic
but hey you look like you're after the
task you're my new partner that's what
all my old partners used to say right
before they died alright hand me that
fingerprinting kit behind you
partner
thanks partner with your how happened
here Oh mr. mayor
I'm so sorry there's been a murder smart
I'm afraid he's telling the truth Mark's
been killed
why who would do this that's exactly
what me and my new partner here are here
to find out um excuse me I feel like we
should call the authorities for them to
handle this matter
look buddy as far as you're concerned I
am the authorities the fact of the
matter is I believe the killer is right
here amongst us in this very house with
that freaky lightning storm outside none
of us would get very far anyway so in
the meantime we're stuck here but I'm
gonna get to the bottom of this the rest
of you get back to your rooms hunker
down and pray to God you're not next to
be murdered I'll check on our other
guests I'll get back to cooking all this
death made me hungry
I I need to talk to the colonel about
this
all right burner it's time to get to
work judging by the temperature of the
body that I measured rectally which is
obviously the most accurate way to get
the inner body temperature of a corpse
that's a fact totally procedure don't
tell me when I did it I am sure mark was
killed around 1:30 a.m. last night so
what were you doing at 1:30 a.m. last
night
[Music]
I'm gonna nor the strange fact that you
sleep with your eyes open but it checks
out so we need to figure out where
everyone was and what they were doing
around that time or at the very least
who saw mark last you need to get out
there see if you can piece together the
story what happened last night I'll
stick around with the body and run more
tests oh don't give me that horseshit
I know you hated him but god damn it he
reached out to you Oh what do you want
from me well I want you to care just
because I'm not weeping like a child
doesn't mean that I don't care
come find me when you pull your head out
of your ass
Damien I don't know ah good to see you
again
you were quite the rapscallion at last
night's festivities but CR probably here
to help the detective with his
investigation of murder anyway
I'll help you I'll tell you what
happened to our dear friend mark oh look
at me my name is markiplier now forget
all my friends or the people that helped
me along the way
just look at my funny oh I need to pay
people to be my friends hahaha
you like me too bad Oh glug-glug oopsy
poopsy i can't hold my booze gotta go
off to the little boy's room who wants
to join me I'm gonna go there I've gone
my stairs my house has more than one
staircase oh look at me and how great I
am
oh no I'm falling oh I'm dead and that's
what happened
probably anyway so if you need to
corroborate this story with anybody else
just be on your way and investigate the
entire house don't know I'll be here
when you're done
come with me I need to shoot now if
you're looking for answers there's
really no mystery at all there's not a
single detail of this house that I'm not
privy to and not a single guest that I
have not personally vetted now I warn
you what you are about to see is not for
the faint of heart if you're made of
evil this is but in we must go you first
[Music]
I thought I told you to stay out of my
kitchen
oh you're helping that dick with his
little investigation huh well I might
look like a sweet and innocent man but
some people with short lifespans might
think otherwise I can't imagine why can
you last night after I got rid of all of
the evidence of that delicious meal I
prepared and wiped down all the
fingerprints from those filthy dishes
and sucked up all that blood
I retired to my room at 1:00 a.m. and
left my little buddy in charge like I
always do
he sees everything why don't you ask him
what happened last night
[Music]
I'm sorry you saw that argument with the
colonel I lost my temper and it wasn't
right he must be in shock the colonel is
an eccentric it's his best quality and
his worst he's my friend
so is Mark
I know I'm supposed to be a leader in
the scenario but I can't help him feel
lost I've known mark for years since we
were kids and he's just gone I don't
have any answers right now
I just need to be alone to process all
of this we'll talk soon but I need to
think
the partner get over here now hurry up
you're not gonna believe this I can
barely believe this the body it's gone
it's just [ __ ] disappeared look
you