Hi, proteanview. I saw your video, and I thought it might be helpful to offer another perspective
on this. Essentially, trans people are treated as part of the LGBT group because there's
more of a reason to include them than there is to leave them out. Yes, their lives and
their experiences are somewhat different, but not so different as to set them completely
apart from us. If we're going to start excluding people because of their differences, we might
as well ask why bisexual people belong with the LGBT group. After all, they're fully capable
of having genuinely satisfying heterosexual relationships, which means they can completely
pass for being straight. So, should they really be included among gays and lesbians, who don't
have that option? Really, should gays and lesbians even be grouped together? The male
and female experience of homosexuality can be very different, including how it relates
to their upbringing, their process of realizing their orientation, what it means to them,
their specific concerns in life, the cultures they've developed for themselves, how they're
regarded in larger society, and so on. So, why are they all still grouped together? Because
in spite of their differences, they nevertheless have a great deal in common. And for the same
reason, trans people are included among gays, lesbians, and bisexuals. They're more alike
than different, and here's why. Gender identity and sexual orientation may be separate aspects
of a person's identity, but issues of gender are fundamental to sexual orientation. Gender
is the very thing that sets us apart from heterosexuals, and being gay means challenging
and transgressing traditionally accepted gender roles. It calls into question the narrow heteronormative
understanding of what it means to be a man, and what it means to be a woman. Loving women
is supposed to be part of being a man, and loving men is supposed to be part of being
a woman. So, it's okay to love men if you're a woman, but not if you're a man. The difference
is one of gender, and this is what defines us as gay rather than straight. The attachment
to these traditional concepts of gender is what leads to various misconceptions about
gay people and their relationships, like the idea that gay men are somehow feminine and
lesbians are masculine. It's why people ask gay couples nonsensical questions like which
one of them is the "woman", when clearly neither of them are women. The implication is that
because they're gay and in a relationship with another man, they must be taking on a
female role. Questions of gender aren't so rigidly separated from sexual orientation
- indeed, they're quite integral to it. And while this can be differentiated into, as
you put it, "who you are" versus "who you prefer to be with", who one wants to be with
is actually a significant component of who one is. Sexual orientation comes with issues
of identity as well. Gays, lesbians, bisexuals and trans people do each undergo a process
of self-discovery in their lives. At some point, they come to realize there's something
different about them, and they have to try and figure out why they feel that way, what
this means for them, and how to come to terms with it. While there are undoubtedly differences
here, achieving an understanding of your sexual orientation also means becoming aware of part
of who you are, and hopefully being able to successfully incorporate this into your concept
of yourself and living a satisfying life that's consistent with your own identity. It's not
the same thing, but there are parallels, in the departure from traditional standards of
sex and gender, in favor of accepting a different identity for oneself. And for this reason,
both gay people and trans people are subject to similar prejudices. They face opposition
from the same people who hold biased beliefs about all of us. The bigots out there don't
usually care to distinguish between sexual orientation and gender identity, assuming
they even recognize the concept of gender identity or understand what it means to be
transgender. They already group us all together and consider us the same, condemning us equally
for failing to conform to their rigid expectations of gender. We face persecution from the same
people and for the same reasons, so why shouldn't we band together in the face of a common enemy?
You might say that merely enduring discrimination isn't a good enough reason to group us together.
But if someone is attacked for being Arab, it doesn't matter if they're actually Mexican.
The problem is still one of racism. And if someone is attacked for being Muslim, when
in fact they're actually Hindu, the problem is still religious prejudice. Gays, lesbians,
bisexuals and trans people do face the same opposition here, from people who expect us
to stay inside the traditional boundaries of what men and women are "supposed" to be.
And it's important to understand that trans people can be gay, lesbian, or bisexual too.
Of course, the same could be said of almost any other group, but the nature of being transgender
makes it inevitable that at some point in their lives, they will be considered to be
gay. For example, if someone is assigned as male at birth and they're attracted to women,
they would be seen as heterosexual. But if they transition, then they would be lesbian.
Or, if someone is gay and then transitions, they would now be straight. But there will
always be a time in their lives when they're gay, lesbian or bisexual, or at least perceived
as such. In fact, any trans person in a relationship with anyone could conceivably be seen as gay,
regardless of their actual orientation. Suppose a woman is assigned male at birth, and then
transitions. If she has a relationship with a man, people might still consider her to
be gay because they would incorrectly view her as "really a man". And if she has a relationship
with a woman, then she would be a lesbian, since she is, of course, a woman. For this
reason, trans people can also be affected by laws that are meant to discriminate against
gays and lesbians. Depending on whether a state will officially recognize a change of
sex, as well as whether they allow same-sex marriage, a trans woman may not actually be
allowed to marry a man if the state doesn't legally consider her to be a woman. And because
all of these laws can vary between states, a trans person's marriage could be considered
valid in one state and invalid in another. It's a complete mess for them. Allowing same-sex
marriage would solve this problem entirely, but in the meantime, trans people are impacted
by the same prejudice that's directed at gay people. They have a stake in this, too - whether
they're gay or straight. So, is the inclusion of trans people really something that, as
you said, "waters down the gay cause"? It seems like anything but. We share a common
interest here. What affects one of us can affect the other. We can use their help, and
they can use ours. We're natural allies. You might call it watered down, but I call it
strength in numbers.