We are now more than halfway through the football season,
and things are really heating up,
which means it's time for another edition
of I Apologize for Talking While You Were Talking.
-♪ ♪ -(cheering and applause)
-Whoa! -(grunting)
What's up, football junkies?
-I'm Michael Kosta. That's Roy Wood Jr. -Yeah.
And as they say, we're ready to jam
that sweet sports up your veins.
-Oh. -That's not a thing you should say on TV.
-But, yes, we do have a lot to talk about, Kosta. -Yeah.
When you hear the word "football," what comes to mind?
Oh, man. I think about Friday nights in high school.
-You know? The crowd cheering my name, -Mm-hmm.
me dropping passes,
the crowd booing my name,
my dad yelling at me,
me having to run home next to the car.
"Please, Dad, don't take the highway."
Okay. That is also a thing you shouldn't say on TV.
When I hear "football," I think about gladiators
-attacking each other with brute force. -Yep.
And in one of last week's games, the Cleveland Browns
-took brute force to a whole new level. -Yep.
Now that disturbing and dangerous fight
at the end of the Browns-Steelers game last night.
A hit with a helmet
getting a football superstar a big penalty.
WOMAN: It started with a late sack
on Mason Rudolph turning into a brawl.
Garrett ripped off Rudolph's helmet,
and then violently swung it.
-MAN 1: Oh, gosh! -MAN 2: Man.
I mean, this is multiple game suspension right here.
WOMAN: And tonight, there are.
Garrett is out at least through the end of the season,
possibly longer.
-Whoa. -Whoa, whoa, whoa.
This is the worst thing a football player has ever done.
Roy, didn't...?
Didn't O.J. play football?
This is the second worst thing a football player has ever done!
-(applause) -Second worst. -Look, look, I...
I get that that was bad, but come on.
He got hit with a helmet.
You know, in football, you're always getting hit
with helmets-- in-in practice, during games,
at the dinner table when your dad doesn't think
you passed the salt fast enough.
You need to see a therapist, man.
But, look, I do think
-if you get hit in the head with your helmet... -Mm-hmm.
then you should get suspended for being a bitch-ass loser.
-(laughter) -Yeah.
It's like a mall cop getting run over by his own Segway.
Yeah, and isn't it sad
how the biggest athletes in the world are swinging it out,
and the only thing the refs can do
is just throw a little yellow flag? (whimpers)
You know, look, I've said it before,
-and it's an unpopular opinion, but ... -Yeah?
this is why the refs need guns.
(laughter)
That...
That is a terrible idea!
So, the Cleveland Browns player
-has been suspended by the NFL indefinitely. -Yup.
But meanwhile, an old NFL player
-might be coming back in. -Okay.
Comeback Kap, the quarterback's, been out of the NFL since 2016,
after he set off a firestorm,
kneeling during the "National Anthem,"
protesting police brutality and racial injustice.
But this weekend, Colin Kaepernick held a workout
with scouts to show teams he's still in game shape
and ready to make his return.
I've been ready for three years.
I've been denied for three years.
We all know why I came out here
and showed you today in front of everybody.
Wow. This is amazing.
Colin Kaepernick held a training session
to show the NFL he's still got it.
Don't forget, Roy. He's been gone for three years.
I know. In that time, he could have graduated law school
and been kneeling in courtrooms by now.
-True. -(laughter)
And here's the thing. Here's the thing
-that I really find most impressive... -Yeah, yeah.
is that Kaepernick only had four days to get ready.
-Four days. -Yeah.
If the league calls me to try out, I'd need about four months.
Uh, Roy, uh...
they're not gonna call, okay?
Let's move on to our final story.
While Colin is trying to get some love,
players at University of Florida
are getting a little too much love.
Most teams have traditions before a game.
Say a chant, touch a lucky statue,
or in the case of the University of Florida football team,
kiss the coach's wife.
And not everyone's comfortable with that.
MAN: This video is lighting up social media.
It shows the head coach's wife kissing players
on the University of Florida football team.
It's a game day tradition.
Megan Mullen looks the young men square in the eyes,
offers a few words of encouragement
and then kisses them on the cheek.
Some are calling it gross and disrespectful.
If this was a man doing it,
this... this would be on CNN, this would be on MSNBC.
This is just embarrassing, Roy.
The coach's wife getting handsy
with all the players on the team.
This is so inappropriate.
I mean, look at the way she's examining
and poking and prodding them. It's...
It's like a deleted scene from Get Out.
Yeah, but Kosta...
Kosta, you're overreacting.
All that happened here is just
some good, old-fashioned, Southern hospitality.
I'm from the South. It's what we do, baby!
Look, just because you're from the South doesn't make it right.
I mean, you guys also did slavery.
-(audience groaning) -I'm sorry. What? Excuse me!
We did slavery? We did slave...
-Are you sure about that? -I don't know. I wasn't there.
But you're the one from the South,
so maybe you should apologize.
-Look, all-all I was trying to say... -(laughter, groaning)
All I was saying is,
I don't think it's appropriate
for her to be feeling up the players like that.
You know, you're telling me you wouldn't get mad
-if I kissed your wife? I mean... -Why?
Why would I get mad? I kissed yours last week.
-Whoa! Whoa! -(audience gasping, groaning)
That was a joke, right? That was a joke?
Well, that's all the time we have.
He's Michael Kosta. I'm Roy Wood, Jr.
-It's all right. Just answer me. -Back to you, Trevor.
-No, no. No, no, no. -It was a joke. That's all right.
-That's all. No, you can be... -No, no.
Michael Kosta and Roy Wood, Jr., everybody.