Why do people cheat? Why do men cheat? Why do women cheat? Who is more likely to cheat on their
partner? How to repair things after infidelity and is it actually possible to cheat proof your
relationship? Make sure to stay till the end for all the answers! My name is Helena Nista and I
make videos that help you have the best sex of your life! And today, we're diving into the topic
of cheating in relationships: why it happens, how to prevent it and what to do about it. First of
all, we actually need to define infidelity. Is it having sex with someone else than your partner?
How about just kissing them? Or flirting with them? Or sexting? How about developing an
emotional connection with someone outside of your relationship? Or watching porn? Or masturbating?
Different people define infidelity differently which can lead to a whole range of problems.
Particularly when people ask me: "my partner did this, is it cheating?". And I have to tell them:
"I don't know! What were the agreements in your relationship?". And what I mean by that is:
did you ever have a chat about what is okay and what isn't within the boundaries of your
relationship. Unfortunately, people very rarely discuss this topic and as a result, feelings can
get seriously hurt. Some people get upset when their partner even looks at other women or men.
While their partner is surprised because he or she would have never even thought that this could
be considered a problem, etc. This is why it's so important to actually define infidelity in
your relationship: what's okay between the two of you. To me personally cheating is any situation
where either one of us forms a secretive relationship with somebody else outside of
the boundaries of what we had previously agreed upon. I have no problem with my man looking at
other women with appreciation or with him forming close friendships with them, as long as he's open
and honest about it. But I'm not okay with it if he was to pursue a desire to form a physically
intimate bond with them. Because it's one thing to feel desirous towards somebody else, that can
happen and I wouldn't blame him for it. But it's another thing altogether what he does about that
desire. And when he acts upon it when we had specifically agreed that we wouldn't do that,
then that's cheating. But that's me and my brain when I am in relationships. And you really need
to find out what's best for you. So according to research, historically men used to be more likely
to cheat but not by that much. However, in recent years it seems that this balance has started to
even out, with women straying approximately as often as men do. So nobody is actually hardwired
to cheat and it's no more fair to say that men are usually the cheaters. When it comes to the reasons
quoted by the people who committed infidelity, there are a few most common ones. Falling out of
love with your partner is among the top causes of cheating. Feeling neglected by your partner
is also very high on that list. When you feel unloved, unappreciated or even rejected at home,
it's easy to follow a desire towards someone else who seems more caring and loving towards you at
that point of time. Getting bored with your sex life and seeking variety can be also a dangerous
situation that can lead to straying. Besides getting attention from somebody else outside of
your relationship can give you a great confidence boost so people who maybe seek validation or who
desire to raise their self-esteem can become cheaters. If you're angry with your partner
about something, maybe their own infidelity, then that can lead to straying. Feeling sexual desire
towards someone else other than your partner can be a reason. And there are also these different
situations which can potentially create risky conditions for cheating, even if you're happy in
your relationship. So whenever there is drinking involved, particularly excessive drinking,
which is why office Christmas parties are notoriously known for inappropriate
behaviour. Which goes to show that people in happy relationships also cheat. Strong sexual
desire towards someone else or a situational factor like alcohol can lower our inhibitions
and impair our judgment to the point of committing infidelity. It's not only people who are unhappy
in their relationships or who are hurt by their partner that cheat. The bad news is that it's
impossible to cheat-proof your relationship. Unfortunately, there's no way to create 100%
certainty that neither one of you will ever stray. Sexual passion and desire is
a very strong and unpredictable force that can lead people to risk their reputations,
families, jobs, careers, etc. However, there are things you can do to minimize the risk
of infidelity. The truth is that relationship satisfaction is among the stronger predictors
of whether the partners will ever stray. So first of all, have that conversation with your partner
or spouse about what behaviours exactly are not okay for you. And then make sure to work on your
connection together. A relationship is a living organism that keeps always changing and evolving.
And if you don't stay on top of it, then life's challenges and temptations will get on top of your
connection. Number one reason that people quote for not cheating on their partner is feeling happy
together. Other reasons quoted are not wanting to feel guilty or fear that their partner might
retaliate and cheat on them as a revenge, so they'd rather not risk that. But I think that
the most important one is feeling happy with your partner. And I really think that we need to start
seeing our relationship as this gorgeous, delicate flower that requires daily attention and care in
order to bloom and thrive. But if the infidelity does happen, there are ways to repair it and to
stay together. Ultimately, it's always a personal choice whether a person stays in the relationship
after they cheated or were cheated on. But many couples do stay together, particularly if
they decide to work on their problems and to face their challenges without denial. There usually are
reasons why the cheating happened and addressing them is very important in this process. And so is
processing all the feelings that the infidelity brought up for both partners. Anger is fine,
grief is fine, frustration is fine. These things take time and nobody says that you need to hurry
up and get over it quickly. This can take months, years even. And it will be difficult for both:
for the person feeling the hurt and betrayal, and for their partner needing to handle the emotions
of their spouse. But what really matters at the end of the day is that the infidelity doesn't
define your relationship. It's just something that happened to your relationship. The connection with
your significant other is about many different things that are still beautiful and valuable,
like your love, the family that you're raising together, the fun times that you share
and have shared, etc. And much, much more! And if you'd like to work on your relationship together,
if you'd like some help in bringing a new spark into your emotional and sexual connection,
make sure to check out my online course Tantric Sex For Couples. It's a fantastic program that
will take you both together on a journey of exploring and practicing beautiful, intimate,
blissful techniques and rituals of tantric lovers. These techniques will help you to deepen the love,
expand the connection that you share and will teach you how to bring a lot more pleasure
into your sex life together. You'll find the link in the description below. Thank you so
much for watching till the end! Please make sure to leave me a 'Like' and a comment below.
I love chatting with you all in the comment section under my videos. And if you enjoy
my content, please consider buying me a coffee through my Patreon account. You'll
also find the link in the description bar below. And now have a wonderful day,
a sexy time (with your partner or all by yourself tonight) and I'll see you next week
on this channel and if you follow my vlogging channel then I'll see you there even sooner!