THE WORLD IS STILL REELING FROM THE BREXIT.
NO ONE KNOWS HOW IT WILL WORK.
DOES ENGLAND NEED ALL NEW TRADE DEALS?
WILL IT BAN FOREIGN WORKERS?
WILL WE HAVE TO PAY IMPORT TARIFFS ON COLDPLAY?
( LAUGHTER ) THERE'S JUST NO WAY OF KNOWING.
AND THERE'S HUGE NEWS ON BREXIT.
THIS GUY RIGHT HERE, THIS IS BORIS JOHNSON, THE
FORMER MAYOR OF LONDON, AND A MAN MANY ARE CALLING ENGLAND'S
DONALD TRUMP BECAUSE HE'S AN ANTI-IMMIGRANT CONSERVATIVE
ACCUSED OF FEARMONGERING FOR POLITICAL GAIN, AND LIKE TRUMP,
HE HAS A HAIR GRAFT FROM A VIKING CORPSE.
( LAUGHTER ) I THINK.
I'M NOT SURE.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) WHAT THAT IS.
YES.
HE LOOKS LIKE-- HE LOOKS LIKE ONLY A SEMISUCCESSFUL CLONE OF
DONALD TRUMP, LIKE THEY USED A TOENAIL OR SOMETHING LIKE THAT.
SO AFTER SUCCESSFULLY LEADING THE BREXIT VOTE, BORIS JOHNSON
WAS THE FAVORITE TO BECOME BRITAIN'S NEXT PRIME MINISTER.
EXCEPT HE DID THIS.
>> IT IS VITAL NOW IN THE CONSERVATIVE PARTY THAT WE BRING
TOGETHER EVERYBODY WHO CAMPAIGNED SO HARD BOTH FOR THE
REMAIN AND THE LEAVE SIDES.
THAT IS THE AGENDA FOR THE NEXT PRIME MINISTER OF THIS COUNTRY.
I HAVE CONCLUDED THAT THAT PERSON CANNOT BE ME.
( LAUGHTER ) >> Stephen: THAT'S LEADERSHIP.
( LAUGHTER ) ( APPLAUSE )
EXCUSE ME.
I HAVE AN ANNOUNCEMENT TO MAKE.
I HAVE BLOWN UP THE THE BRIDGE.
NOW, EVERYBODY, ACROSS THE RIVER SOMEHOW!
I'LL STAY HERE.
( LAUGHTER ) ALSO, I JUST HEARD THAT ON THE
DAY OF THE BREXIT VOTE-- THIS IS TRUE-, BREXIT BEAT PORN AS
GOOGLE'S MOST POPULAR SEARCH TERM.
THAT IS UNBELIEVABLE.
THAT THERE ARE PEOPLE WHO JUST SEARCH FOR THE WORD "PORN."
YOU GUYS KNOW PORN IS AVAILABLE THAT'S LIKE GOING TO THE GROCERY
STORE AND ASKING, "EXCUSE ME, WHICH AISLE HAS THE FOOD?"
IN FACT, THERE'S SO MUCH PORN ON THE WEB, I BET THAT IF YOU
GOOGLE "BREXIT," YOU'LL GET PORN ANYWAY.
MAYBE A VIDEO OF A GUY GOING-- ( BRITISH ACCENTS )
DING-DONG!
I SAY, DID SOMEBODY ORDER SOME BANGERS AND MASH!
( AS BRITISH WOMAN ) YES, I DID!
BUT HOWEVER SHALL I PAY FOR IT NOW THAT THEY'VE DEVALUED THE
POUND?
( AS BRITISH MAN ) WELL, MY LADY, I COULD GIVE YOU
A VERY VALUABLE POUND.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) THEY DON'T CALL ME "BIG BEN" FOR
NOTHING.
( LAUGHTER ) THEN THEY BOTH CLOSE THEIR EYES
AND THINK OF ENGLAND.
AND YOU KNOW WHAT, GUYS.
CLOSE YOUR EYES RIGHT NOW AND THINK OF JON BATISTE AND STAY