It is . . . very hot outside
All my lights are on in this house
and I am wearing a sweater
so if I faint
Don't call the cops. Just let me die, actually. [Honestly Same]
MAC
Hellooooo
Welcome to me
to my life
to my sanctuary
sanctuaryy
[voice cracking] sactuaryyy
[weird noises]
sanctuarrryy
I haven't eaten anything all day yet so I'm kind of loopy...
So as you guys might have seen in my last video,
if you have watched my last video
If you haven't watched my last video, go watch my last video
But it's ok I'll just ruin it anyways right here
I'm going on TOUR!
[high weird voice] sanctuaryy
No, I'm done.
I am going on tour
I did it
I scammed them
I just wanted to travel *laughs* No.
But officially going on tour means that I have crossed a level of fame
that I never thought I would ever cross in my entire life
that I think nobody ever wanted me to cross in my entire life
Honestly
I'm gonna change like a bitch
-*creepy laughter*
And as I've noticed,
One thing that a lot of YouTubers
that think the world owes them shit does
When they reach a level of fame
is google themselves
on video.
I've never googled myself before
I don't think I have.
Have I?
I probably have, honestly.
I'm narcissistic as fuck
Now that I believe I'm at the same level as those people,
(which I'm horribly wrong)
Today I decided it's going to be the first day I'm going to that.
And probably be horribly disappointed
cause who da hell's gonna be talking about me?
Just give me one porn website.
Just one porn.
All I need is one porn and I'm good.
Maybe a foot website
foot fetish, I don't know.
Maybe there's an entire thread of people who wanna kill me.
That would be great, actually.
I'll be down with that.
Maybe it's gonna be a bunch of articles of homophobes talking shit about me
Oh, look! There goes all the f**ks I don't give.
Let's go!
It's also Black History Month.
Let's see if YouTube remembers I'm black this year...
[typing] Mac Does It.
Google! Do your thing!
K.
Here we are.
*laughs* wow
Such content for this video.
As you can see, first things first
my YouTube channel
Duh!
Second thing: my Twitter.
Follow me.
Please follow me on Twitter.
Follow me on Twitter.
I'm really - I've been...Fol-
Just...
K.
"Famous Birthdays."
Wow!
Even Google knows I'm famous!
I have a famous birthdays, y'all!
Wow, that picture.
*laughs*
"Comedy Vlogger on YouTube with the channel title
MacDoesIt.
He's best known for his parody and 'how-to guru' videos"
no I'm not
"which have gained him 800,000 subscribers."
Yeah, right.
"Before Fame."
*laughs*
Before fame, bitch.
"Family Life.
He has admitted to being gay in his videos
His sister gave him a shirt that says 'World's Okayest Brother.'"
What kind of boring-ass family life section?
"Machiazelli Kahey fans also view Jake Paul,
RiceGum, Logan Paul,
and Lele Pons."
Am I in the same realm as them?
Am I - are we -
is this-
did I-
Who did I piss off?
I just wanna know..
I mean...
I'm just thinking, like people
looking at my 'Famous Birthdays'
and the first thing that pops into their mind is
"hmmm, Jake Paul.
Oh yes, MacDoesIt.
But you know who I'm thinking of now?
The Paul brothers.
Oh, MacDoesIt's cool
But you know who else is cool?
RiceGum.
I feel like there's no correlation.
I'm also a member of '21-year olds'
That is a terrifying picture
of Liza Koshy
Girl, who you finna kill?
"November 25, 1996."
Correct.
I was born in Los Angeles, California.
Correct.
I'm twenty-one years old.
Correct.
I am also...number...
six thousand, seven hundred and sixty-two
[lol bish wot?]
That's not even famous anymore
That's like - that's not even -
Why am I on this website?
Six thousand, seven hundred and sixty-two??
Wow.
At least I should be number six thousand, seven hundred and sixty-one, bitch.
Let's not get it twisted, ok?
I'm going on tour.
Oooo, who else was born on November 25th?
Number one of people born on November 25th
is a YouTuber that goes by
PopularMMMos
doesn't even have a picture
Am I just supposed to accept this?
Who are you?
Why are you stealing my grind?
Minecraft gamer number two-hundred
in most popular.
Who are you?
I've never heard of you in my entire life?
Why are you so famous?
Get that hustle,
get that life, get that promo, but like
"-whaaaaaaa?? -no!"
Can I have, like four?
It's just a lot of YouTubers
and a Musical.ly-er! Ooohhh nooooo
What's 'boost'?
What does that do?
What'd I do? What'd I do?
I didn't do anything
I just pressed a button and it
turned pink
Wow, what a great mechanic? *laughs*
Oh, does it boost me on the popular page??
Bitch!
You can make me more famous
off of a press of a goddamn button!
Girl. Girl.
Girl.
If y'all don't
If we don't coordinate this, bitch.
Girl, link in the description.
We finna...
Ooo, they even have a video, bitch!
These are some old-ass videos
Oh my god
"was spotted at Disneyland in early 2017"??
Who reported that?
*laughs*
What does that mean??
Oh, he's a human
who was at Disneyland once so he's real.
He ain't fake
He's a real person
"spotted at Disneyland"
That's the only time I've ever been outside, bitch.
That's kinda creepy...
but I'm into it
Paparazzi, what
"claims to look like Disney's Cory Baxter"
I didn't claim that shit
Let's rewind this
Let's remember who the people that first
started calling me Cory Baxter
a.k.a. you guys
a.k.a. on Twitter
a.k.a. two years ago
*clapping* I didn't claim anything.
I just accepted it
I accepted the bullying.
Now I've just made it my own.
Excuse me?
Is that it? Wow, my life is boring...
When I die, and they decide to search me up
and find my Famous Birthdays page
is that I've been to Disneyland once
and I think I look like Cory Baxter.
How depressing *laughing* is this?
What else we got, Google?
There's my merch page
buy my merch
ooohhh. Oh, wow.
There's a lot!
"Is Mac ok?"
Honestly, I'm still trying to figure that out... [same]
"Underrated YouTubers"
All they listed was me and Garrett Watts.
Honest, true, TBH.
But let's be honest
I am not in the same realm as Garrett Watts.
OK, that man can edit around me anytime
of the day.
That man is an editing legend.
Have you seen his videos?
I'm gonna shout him out now.
"I don't eat. I just meme."
When did I tweet that?
Why am I a terrible person?
AAww, someone made a doodle of me
oooooooo
Does six thousand, seven hundred and sixty-one have doodles of them?
I don't think so.
Does six thousand, seven hundred and sixty-one have
a picture on Tumblr where someone covered his face with laser eyes?
I think not, bitch.
Fix the system.
*weird distorted electric guitar music* [Da faq]
And on that note,
we are moving on.
Ok, but like where's the porn?
"A MacDoesIt and Chris Oflyng Lemon".
What's a lemon?
"Mac had wanted to meet Chris for a long time."
Oooo
"His gay ass just wanted to take Chris's
big cock and suck it till his
warm semen came spewing out"
WOAHH
We went straight into it!
Is this what 'lemon' means?
"Mac was getting so turned on
and got a huge erection
and was starting to get a bit of precum
beating out of it"
whhahah
huuuuuuuuuhhhislaljkf
"He grabbed the cherry-flavored lube that he had
in the drawer right next to him
and pulled Chris's pants down
and started to-" maaaaaahhh
hhhuuuhuuuuhuh
"Mac then whipped out his
chocolate brown cock
and started stroking-" Noooooohh
*screams*
At the bottom it says
"to be continued"
Kay. Let's move on.
Oh, wow
What a coincidence!
There's a link to buy tickets to my tour
right underneath the Wattpad?
Oh, might as well
buy a ticket
since you're here
watching me
Link in the description!
"Twenty-five plus best memes about MacDoesIt"
There are twenty-five plus memes about me?
There's literally only one meme.
Where are the other twenty-four, bitch?
You had me believin' I was relevant.
And now we're just on a bunch of questions about Mac computers.
"Burgers and Mac, does it get better?"
I hate it!!
I hate my name!!
Six thousand, seven hundred and sixty-two
Also, if you see the word 'lemon'
next to a book, don't read it!
Comment down below:
Are you coming to my tour?
Please come to my tour.
I want you to come to my tour.
Come to my tour.
Go buy a ticket.
Come to my tour?
But if not, what's your favorite color?
Is it purple, like the color of my tour poster?
Come to my tour.
Please come to my tour.
My name's Mac and don't forget to
like, comment, share, and subscrib-ay.
Waahhh!
*outro music*