It's good to see you.
I'm sorry about everything, my beard.
I look--
I like it.
Yeah?
What are you talking about?
And I liked the mustache in the movie, too.
I think it's very dapper.
That's funny.
Aniston used to say I look better with it,
but my wife thought it was disgusting.
Really?
Yeah.
Yeah, she didn't like the kisses.
Does she like it now?
Oh, the kisses she doesn't like.
The kisses aren't as good.
It hurts her.
Yeah.
No.
Let me feel how rough that is.
It's not--
It's soft.
It is?
I mean, I would think it's harder with razor burn.
Unless you're shaving every five minutes or something,
that's got to be worse.
Yeah.
Thank you.
Dapper.
Oh, there he is.
Yeah, that's as good as I look.
That's the best.
It's so funny that whenever in a movie they write in,
"and Adam puts a tuxedo on," everyone's
like, well, wait till you get the tuxedo.
Every time I come out of the trailer with a tuxedo,
you just see wardrobe going, ooh.
I thought it would look better.
But that looks all right on me.
It looks very good.
Thank you.
You're like a Peter Sellers type looking like that.
Don't you think?
Yeah.
Jennifer looks very good.
Should I talk about the movie yet?
Not yet.
No.
OK.
We'll get to that.
Because I have other things to talk to you about.
OK.
Thank you.
But the movie is very funny, and it's beautiful.
I mean, just the locations that you pick are just crazy.
I want to be in all of your movies.
So you said you have how many-- two daughters?
Yes.
I have--
How old?
The one's 10, and one's 12.
And the bat mitzvah is coming for the older one, Sadie.
And she's getting bat mitzvahed in like a month.
Oh!
So she's been practicing.
That's exciting.
Yeah.
It's nice.
She's doing great.
What is that age of-- is that dating yet, that 12 or 13?
You know, I drive around with her friends,
and I hear them talking about boys now.
It's amazing the feelings I had about the same boys.
Five years ago, when they would mention the kid's name,
I'd be like, I love that kid.
Now, I get very jumpy.
They got little tiny mustaches, and they're all a little tall,
and their bodies aren't making much sense.
And I see them.
I see them make eye contact with my kid.
It's very weird to see your kid lock eyes with a boy
while they're talking.
Just like, whoa, you lock with daddy's eyes, man.
Yeah.
That's kind of creepy, too.
That's a good one, Ellen.
You're right.
That is gross.
Easy there.
Not locked.
I just say, you know--
Yeah.
I understand.
I'm not saying gaze in daddy's eyes.
I understand.
Yeah.
Funny.
So you went to the Kids' Choice Awards.
You got slimed.
I did get slimed.
But you were warned, right?
They warn you that you're going to get slimed.
They asked me if I wanted to get slimed.
I said no because I've done it before.
And it really takes over your whole weekend.
Once you get slimed, you gotta clean it off.
It just doesn't come out easy.
It's all over, inside parts of your body,
and you got to do crazy stuff.
So I told my 10-year-old, Sunny, yeah,
they asked if I want to get slimed.
I said no.
And then she goes, you said no?
And I said, no, no, no, no.
I'll say yes.
And so I changed my mind real quick just to make her happy.
And those two were in the crowd, and then I got slimed.
Oh yeah, there.
I got hit hard in the face.
And I got to tell you, man, I didn't
know it was coming from--
Wow!
I didn't know it was--
Wow!
Yeah.
Right.
So then I put--
That's terrible.
--my hood on too late.
I thought it was going to drop from the sky.
That's how they usually got me in the past.
So I was expecting to get hit in the head.
And then they shot--
out of nowhere, they hit me hard in the face.
And I swear to God, I was blind.
I was blind up there for, like, 10 minutes, you know?
And I was like going--
and I'm having to say the rest of my award.
And I'm holding the award up and the speech.
And I can't see, and it's making no sense.
And then they pull me out.
I hear, this way, Adam.
There are commercials.
This way, this way.
I'm like that.
And they bring me to take a shower.
I take a shower.
I try to get all the stuff.
And I'm in the middle of the shower going,
am I still supposed to be blind right now?
I can't believe it, because they hit me deep in the eyeballs.
Wow.
Well, that makes nobody want to ever get
slimed listening to that story.
Yes.
No, it's fun.
It's fun except--
You were blind.
--the blindness.
For how long?
How long did that last?
I'd say halfway through driving home, I started seeing again.
That seems safe.
Yeah.
It was fine.
That's great.
The kids will be fine.
Hope you're happy, kids.
So you're hosting Saturday Night Live next week.
Yes.
And that's the first time since you were on.
Yes.
That's so exciting.
Did you ever do it?
I've hosted once a long time ago.
You know, I'm working all the time now, so I never can.
But that's the first time since you were on the show.
Yeah.
Are you nervous or just excited?
Very excited, you know?
I just spoke to Lorne Michaels, who runs the show.
And he gave me my gig when I was a young boy.
And I just felt so relaxed talking to him.
And instead of being a nervous wreck,
I figured I'd go and have a good time.
And I love the cast and the writing.
And I'm going to let them just run the show.
And I'll jump on there and just have a good time.
I can't wait.
Look at that.
Oh my gosh.
Yeah.
You were a young boy.
I was.
That doesn't even look like you.
That's like a--
I know.
There he is.
We'll see.
I have no idea what I'm doing on the show,
but I do remember being young and happy.
Yeah.
Well, and now you'll be older and happy.
Yeah.
All right.
More with Adam after this.