[OHHHH YEEEEEAH]
[Mmmmm...]
Wow, this is a really nice place! Thanks!
Look, Dan...
There's something I have to tell you... I...lied about my age.
Your profile said you weren't interested in girls under 21, but...
We had so much in common, and-- Woah, woah, just...
How old ARE you?!
20.
That's totally fine!!
You know, I actually lied to you a little bit too.
You did? Yeah...
My name's not actually Dan.
It's...it's Jane.
Yeah! Not many girls wanna go out with a guy called Jane!
Don't worry about it! I'm not actually a natural brunette!
I can't even speak French! I don't know why I lied about that one!
I'm not actually a woman!!
What?!
Is that bad?
I'm sorry, we were opening up... Sorry...you're not actually a woman?!
Yeah, it's just, like, a lot of makeup. I REALLY like you...
Why would you... We just had so much in common!
OH! We kissed...
(Sigh) I'm sorry.
You know what, it's fine. To be honest... I'm not even a man!
-Seriously?! -Yeah!
Wow. Okay... I guess we're back where we started from?
You know what? Let's just pick up where we left off.
Fine!
Oh, wait. Do you have a condom?
Everything alright? Uhh, condoms, condoms...
Yeah, not my dress!
Know the feeling! Not even my house! WHAT?!
What are you people doing in my house?!
We're not robbing you! Yes! I am the painter!
And I'm the VCR repair man!
I don't HAVE a VCR!
I can fix that.
You know what? Don't bother. BECAUSE I'M ACTUALLY ROBBING THIS PLACE.
Well I guess it's a good job that I'm actually an UNDERCOVER COP.
(Gasp) And THAT right there is my partner.
Uhhh...
Sorry, sweetheart, but I'm not your partner...
I'm his.
No! Wait, so you're gay?
No? Actually that does make us gay.
What?!
(Off Screen) What a twist!
Who are you?!
Oh, I'm Jack. You all thought I was a lamp...
But I'm actually... not a lamp...what?!
-I'm sorry, what is actually going on here? -I thought you said this sketch would make sense?
I lied...I lied to you all.
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What?! Sorry, that 'action' was for me, right?!