That is a lot of energy coming at a person on a daily basis.
Every day.
No wonder your eyes are so lit up all the time.
You're getting a lot of juice.
I know.
You get an amazing crowd.
These people are fabulous.
I know.
They are fabulous.
[APPLAUSE]
And it really is everyday.
I can't believe that this has been
your whole life for 15 years, and this is my first time.
Well, you were on the east coast, so I never see you.
And you're always working and traveling and stuff.
Right, right.
Or you're working on cars.
Yes.
Or getting coffee or something.
Yes, we're getting coffee.
But I shot one of your episodes.
We had so much fun.
I've been watching it this past week.
Is it good?
It's so funny.
So Ellen and I got into this conversation.
Actually, it was about horses.
Do you recall the conversation?
No.
And I, as on my show, like to tell people what to do.
You know, they tell me what's going on in their life.
And I go, well, I'll tell you what I think you should do.
And I said to you, would you like my advice
about Portia getting another horse?
Oh, yes.
You remember it now?
I remember that now.
Yeah.
And Ellen did not want my advice,
but she was trying to be nice.
So she went, yeah, OK.
The way only she can do it, I can't
do it as funny as she did it.
And then we got the giggles.
And it was a lot of fun.
It was really fun.
Yeah.
So you've seen the show, hopefully.
And if you haven't, you should.
But we're just walking and talking in Montecito,
where I live.
And we go to this restaurant that I always
go to, that you knew we were going to go to.
And literally everyone-- they moved
all of the tables out of the way,
except for the table in the center.
And everyone there is still eating.
And we're sitting in the middle of the restaurant with cameras
everywhere, like we're some kind of live dinner play.
You knew everyone was watching and listening
to our conversation.
But what happens, and this happens on the show
all the time, is at first they go, oh, my God.
This is Jerry Seinfeld and Ellen DeGeneres.
And then, they go back to eating.
They just kind of get--
I don't think they listened to us.
There was a table.
I was aware.
Because doing this show, I have to have peripheral vision.
I have to know everything that's going on.
I was watching, but listening to you intently.
But also, there was a table.
They were just having the time-- they
couldn't believe their luck.
They were obviously tourists.
And they wandered into that restaurant.
And they're like, oh, my God, and listening to us.
And we were cracking each other up and having
a great conversation.
They were listening to every word we said.
Yeah.
And then, someone had a phone recording the entire thing,
also.
Well, we were recording it, too.
Everyone's recording everything anyway.
That's true.
But anyway, now they're saying we should
show a clip of that episode.
OK.
Here's a little clip.
The shows not finished yet.
But here we are talking and laughing.
Keys are not in the car.
See, I told you, you shouldn't leave the keys in the car.
I didn't touch them.
I didn't either.
You didn't put them in your pocket?
Maybe I did.
I must have, but I don't have them.
I swear.
They're not in--
It was to teach you a lesson.
And you should always--
[LAUGHTER]
I could've let that go longer.
If you had any balls, which you don't--
I should have let it go really, really long.
I don't think it was going any place funny.
Had we gone longer--
How'd you get them out?
How'd you do it?
When you walked around the car--
That's funny.
You just said, it wasn't funny.
No, the way you did it is funny.
What you did is not funny.
[LAUGHTER]
So yeah, we get back in the car--
[APPLAUSE]
I just couldn't believe that I got in the car,
and he had just left the keys in there.
And, I mean, it's a safe town.
There's no crime there.
But still, I was--
Yes, and it's a TV show.
But not really.
People don't usually steal cars from sets of TV shows.
It was not a set.
We were in a parking lot.
There were lots of other--
anyway, and that was the car you chose
to suggest my personality.
Yes, the Toyota FJ 40.
It's kind of a Jeep, but it's a Toyota from the early '70s.
And it's just got that real--
you know, it's just relatable and real.
It just reminded me of you.
That was very sweet.
I was touched by that.
So the concept is you pick someone up in a car.
We talk, and we drive around for a while.
And then, we go have coffee.
Now, it's the middle of the day.
I only have like one cup in the morning.
And then, I don't have coffee again.
We're sitting there, and I thought
it was just the title of the show,
Comedians In Cars Having Coffee.
Oh, my God.
The amount of coffee you drink is not good for you.
Yeah, no.
It wasn't good.
You really do drink the entire time.
The whole time.
I just started drinking coffee.
When?
Just a few years ago.
I never drank it my entire adult life.
Until this series?
Is that why--
Just before the series.
I drank this drink.
And I go, this is a fantastic drink.
And it really gets you chatty.
[LAUGHTER]
So I felt, why don't I do a show with comedians drinking coffee,
getting chatty?
Yeah.
And that's how I started doing it.
But when they come over with the pot,
don't you think it's nice that they go,
would you like some more coffee?
They don't say, would you like more pasta?
Would you like more steak?
They say, would you like more coffee?
So whenever the guy comes over, I would say, sure.
It seems nice.
He never stopped drinking coffee.
And we were there hours.
Yeah, hours.
And you never peed.
You never got up.
[LAUGHTER]
And you sleep at night?
Yes.
Yeah, it doesn't bother me, really.
I was having one right before.
That's crazy.
I love coffee, now.
Just black, right?
No, I add a little half and half.
OK.
Or black, I don't care.
I love any kind of coffee.
Wow.
Why did it take you so long?
Why so late in life?
I didn't know about it.
You know how comedians can be very out of it,
in certain ways?
No.
OK.
What do you mean comedians can be out of it?
Coffee has been everywhere, all over the world, forever.
Like, you've never--
You know a lot of comedians that have
major chunks of dysfunction or ignorance
about giant things of life.
They just don't know.
Coffee is not a giant thing.
Coffee is--
I just missed it.
I missed it.
I didn't know that it was great.
It's great.
It is.
It's a great drink.
It's delicious.
Yeah.
It has a unique quality though, I think, in conversation.
I think coffee makes people kind of warm up to each other.
That's what I find, doing the show.
I think tequila's better for that.
[APPLAUSE]
All right, we have to take our break.
But tequila and coffee together, that way--
I don't know.
I've never had that.
I guess you could have that.
I don't know.
Anyway, somebody is mouthing out.
Does that exist?
Yes.
Tequila and coffee?
Oh, it exists?
So these alcoholic coffee drinks--
these are people that go, I am going to get trashed and alert,
tonight.
Yes.
I'm going to remember tomorrow.
Yes.
That's exactly what it would be.
Yeah.
I want to be whatever the opposite of tired and sober is.
Yes.
That's what I want to be.
Right.
I don't know that mood, but I guess it happens.
No, you'll find out.