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- And I was so hurt because so many people there knew me,
and acted like they loved me.
And there they were,
silent, and not in my defense.
(lamp turning on)
Rababana wa aatina ma wa'dtana 'ala rusulika
wa la tukhizna yawmal qiyamah
innaka la tukhliful mee'ad
- So up until this moment of being thrown into a fire,
Ibrahim 'Alayhi Salaam
he's threatened every once in a while,
but at the end of the day,
I mean he's still walking freely amongst his people,
and he's not being harmed.
he's not being ridiculed.
Now one of the things about every single prophet,
of Allah without exception,
is that they were slandered and ridiculed.
"Kuthibu"
Whether they were killed or not that's a different story,
but all of them had some sort of denial,
some sort of lie against them to discredit them.
And when you're looking at
Ibrahim 'Alayhi Salaam
even though he was spared from the fire,
the wounds of that moment are still there.
There's still something there,
that is going to harm him,
and that he's going to hold with him,
That takes him into that next part of his journey.
And we see that even with the prophet
SallAllahu 'Alaihi Wasallam
What was harder
on the messenger SallAllahu 'Alaihi Wasallam
It wasn't Uhud,
over Ta-if,
even though Uhud,
he was physically wounded more
than Ta-if.
He was almost killed.
SallAllahu 'Alaihi Wasallam
They thought he was dead.
But Ta-if because Ta-if,
comes with the whole package of humiliation,
of ridicule, of the words that were said to him.
SallAllahu 'Alaihi Wasallam
Of the people that wouldn't even look at him,
of the spits of the humiliation,
of the fact that he had no one to turn to,
no one's carrying him,
the way they're carrying him in Uhud
it's just him and Allah Subh'anahu Wa Ta-A'la
So, can any of you reflect on,
sort of a moment in your life where you feared ridicule,
and then Allah brought you through something,
and it wasn't as severe as it was going to be,
or you conquered something in that regard.
Where it was just you,
but you overcame that fear.
- I've definitely had multiple situations,
but I think I'm gonna go with,
when I was teaching.
They always tell you keep away from the teacher's lounge,
because that's where the gossip happens.
And I was in the middle of doing an experiment,
and I had to run into the lounge to get some kind of item.
And all of a sudden everybody that was in there,
just went quiet,
- mm
- and you all know what that means, you know?.
And I was like okay, you know,
and I told everybody, I was like, is everybody okay?.
They're were like,
one of the people there said,
we were just talking about you.
And I was shocked because how are you going to say this,
Like in front of me?.
And so the sad part is it was a bunch,
of Islamic studies, and Quranic teachers.
And so I was like, trying to think,
I'm like okay,
what can I say to get out of this,
so that I don't, you know.
I just, I wanna think good about them.
So I said no,
insha'Allah
it was good things.
And unfortunately they said no,
it was not.
And I was so hurt because so many people there knew me,
and acted like they loved me.
And there they were.
silent, and not in my defense.
And so I walked out trying to teach the rest of my class.
And I remember thinking like,
I mean, I just got hasanats that's good.
(People laugh)
But I also thought like wow,
this really hurts.
You know, this, this is something,
that is going to be really hard for me to go through.
And I had to, I had to go back to
Allah Subh'anahu Wa Ta-A'la
and I definitely had to cry about it.
And I think emotions like that,
sometimes we don't give each other the space for it.
You know especially for me,
I didn't have the space for it in that moment.
I had to go back to teach, you know?.
And so in that moment,
I needed to just say like
Hasbiallah wa ni'mal wakeel
Just like Allah Subh'anahu Wa Ta-A'la
put peace in my heart right now.
I don't wanna think ill of anyone.
Let me be, you know.
it wasn't even about being the bigger person,
It was just, I want to be at peace.
And this is something that I can only imagine,
that Ibrahim 'Alayhi Salaam shows,
in such a more elevated place, you know.
Like he has the whole community talking bad about him,
behind his back, and in front of his back.
And that, that I can only imagine this is probably
an inkling of a feeling of what he was feeling.
And I think that humanization is important of the
of the prophets.
Because I mean they have feelings too,
and it, and sometimes we,
we look up to them, and say look well they did it,
And that's how we should act.
But we subtracted the feeling,
that maybe wasn't necessarily expressed, but was there.
So that was my story.
- I think it's very interesting,
that you comforted yourself initially by saying, well
I just got some hasanat,
I just got some good deeds. (people laugh)
Because if you think about it,
that's really the mindset of the believer.
Is that they take the pain in this world,
Even if that pain is not physical pain again,
and they channel it towards Allah Subh'anahu Wa Ta-A'la
seeking a reward in the hereafter.
You know Abdul-Rahman Ibn Mehdi Rahimahullah saying
you know, if I didn't want people to sin,
I would hope that everyone in the world backbited me,
because what's sweeter,
than finding a good deed on your record,
on the day of judgment,
that you didn't even know about right?.
Like where did all this come from?.
Well these people were talking about you,
and these people.
But at the same time,
it doesn't feel good when you're in the moment.
And even the prophet SallAllahu 'Alaihi Wasallam
You know, it hurt him, Allah 'Azawajal
acknowledges that la yahzunuk.
It actually causes you huzun,
it causes you sadness.
What they say,
You know, they're saying things that cause you sadness.
But subhanallah look at the mechanism,
and this is actually pretty amazing because,
what did Ibrahim 'Alayhi Salaam do?.
Wala tukhzini yawma yuba'thun
Oh Allah don't disgrace me,
on the day that we're resurrected, right?.
He took that day,
and he understands that this is a very temporary moment.
It hurts being thrown into the fire,
being stripped,
but he says, wala tukhzini yawma yuba'thun,
don't humiliate me on the last day.
And Allah honors him,
as we know,
with a garment on that day.
The first person to be clothed on the day of judgment,
is Ibrahim 'Alayhi Salaam.
Brought in front of everyone,
and clothed in a beautiful way.
And that dua interestingly enough,
you find it in our duas as well.
Wala tukhzina yawm al-qiyama
You know when we're calling,
upon Allah Subh'anahu Wa Ta-A'la we're taught in the Quran,
do not disgrace us on the day of judgment.
Do not disgrace us on the day of judgment.
And Allah says,
yawma la yukhzillah ul-nabi walatheena amanu ma'a
the day that Allah Subh'anahu Wa Ta-A'la,
will not disgrace the prophet,
And those that believe with him.
So it's really powerful because,
you know what is khizi?.
what is true humiliation, right?.
Innaka man tudkhil il-naar, fa qad akhzayta
those that you enter into the fire,
those are the people that are really humiliated.
That's true humiliation.
because everything else,
just like every other pain is temporary.
Right?.
But when you're in the moment,
it doesn't feel that way right?.
When you're in the moment you hurt.
Do you think it's okay to ask Allah Subh'anahu Wa Ta-A'la,
to spare you from humiliation in this world as well?.
- Well yeah,
I think humiliation looks different,
to different people.
But I would say humiliation in this world,
to me would be anything that would disgrace me,
in front of Allah as well.
So I don't know.
- Interesting. Can you elaborate on that?.
- I'm just thinking of all the times that there is a moment,
where I needed to it act on something,
that was required justice,
and if I was meek,
or not forthright.
And defense, not defensive,
but rather putting the right,
you know actions forward.
And even though it might hurt me,
I find that,
that's humiliating to me.
To be put in a space,
where I could have helped create more justice,
And I didn't.
That I find is humiliation.
I also don't think that it's what
Allahu Subh'anahu Wa Ta-A'la,
would have wanted.
- Masha-Allah, Anyone else is there?.
- Just to add to what you said
and just taking it, you know a step back.
I think secretly, everybody worries about,
you know being humiliated,
and you know,
that they're afraid of it.
They're worried that, you know,
somehow they'll say something,
they'll do something,
and somehow you know, they'll be humiliated for it.
So absolutely.
And you know, the dua we make.
Allahuma astur a'wrati
like one of the duas,
that we make to Allah is to cover up our faults.
And that is because indirectly,
we are worried about being humiliated.
So that is why I think it's absolutely,
I think as a Muslim, you know we make dua
for it in this dunya,
and the hereafter.
- And that's one of the things where the prophets
SallAllahu 'Alaihi Wasallam duas are so beautiful,
and comprehensive.
A'athu bika min khizi il-dunya wa a'thab al-akhira
He would seek refuge in Allah,
from humiliation in this life,
and punishment in the hereafter,
because no one wants that, right?.
But at the same time,
where is the key difference between the believer,
and the one who doesn't have something to anchor them,
in the midst of that ridicule?.
Wa la yakhafuna lawma tala-am
They don't fear the blame of the blamer.
Meaning the blame of the blamer,
will not be enough to stop them from pursuing,
the reward of the most high.
And so the scholars say that you bring it back to this,
you compare the praise of Allah,
to the praise of others.
And you find more sweetness in the praise of Allah,
than the praise of others.
And then you compare the blame of Allah,
to the blame of others.
If my Lord were to punish me,
or to call me to account,
for something I have done.
To if people were to call me to account,
or punish me or ridicule me,
for something I'm doing right.
You compare the blame.
So the praise from Allah is sweeter,
than the praise of others.
The blame from Allah is more bitter,
than the blame of others.
And then the punishment of Allah is harsher,
more severe than the punishment of people,
for doing the right thing.
And then you sort of package that all together.
And there is that,
you know, I'm not going to compromise the praise of Allah,
for the praise of people.
I'm not going to risk the punishment of Allah,
for fear of the punishment of people.
And I'm not going to let that fear of humiliation,
and disgrace in this life,
drive me to a place where I end up,
being disgraced, and dishonored in the next life.
And at the same time, subhanallah.
What we find is that the prophet
SallAllahu 'Alaihi Wasallam.
He sought refuge from humiliation in both worlds.
And while he suffered in this life for some time,
and while you still have people,
that will say things about him
SallAllahu 'Alaihi Wasallam
right?
The sweetness of all of these people that are following him
SallAllahu 'Alaihi Wasallam
right?
Overcomes all of that.
Subhanallah, the last thing he saw in this life.
Was what?
His followers.
knowing that there will always be some people,
that will speak about him.
But at the end of the day,
what are you seeking?.
He was always doing it for Allah Subh'anahu Wa Ta-A'la
And when those people harmed him,
he knew that he always had a reward to look forward to,
from Subh'anahu Wa Ta-A'la.
So sister Sarah,
wanting to be seen in a positive light,
by others is pretty natural.
But obviously you can't let that drive you,
in your decision making.
So how do you find a healthy balance,
when facing criticism from others?.
Especially when it's from those that you love.
- It's definitely a natural human emotion to want to
be accepted by others,
to want to have a sense of belonging.
To want people that you care about to be happy with you,
and to be pleased with you.
Even when the prophet Muhammad SallAllahu 'Alaihi Wasallam,
was experiencing so much hatred,
coming from so many different places.
Allah Subh'anahu Wa Ta-A'la actually comforts him,
by saying you know,
we know that you're saddened by what they say, right?
He's validating the emotion,
of we know that it's hard,
you know.
Allah Subh'anahu Wa Ta-A'la knows that it's hard,
when the people that you care about,
are criticizing you,
and are against you.
But one of the antidotes,
that's so powerful.
And it's mentioned in this verse,
where Allah Subh'anahu Wa Ta-A'la says,
we know you're saddened by what they say,
but they're not turning away from you right?.
They're turning away from the truth right?.
They're turning away from the truth of our,
our verses.
subhanAllah
And that's one of the things,
that I think is really helpful to remember,
when you're facing criticism.
Is that criticism,
a lot of times is actually more of a reflection,
of the person doing the criticizing,
than it is a reflection of you.
And as a human being, as a person,
your actions.
And so separating that can be,
can be very helpful.
And that's something that Ibrahim 'Alayhi Salaam,
We see in his story he does so beautifully.
subhanAllah where he's realizing that the criticism,
that he's facing from people,
has to do with the fact that they're rejecting the truth,
and not necessarily has to do
with him as a person, personally.
And so you can depersonalize that,
which is very, very powerful.
Masha-Allah
And then also realizing, and Ibrahim 'Alayhi Salaam
Masha-Allah, does this so beautifully.
Is realizing that a lot of times,
people's opinions of others do not align,
with the value that Allah Subh'anahu Wa Ta-A'la
assigns a person.
And we see that in the example,
of so many of the prophets.
That so many people turned against them,
they're struggling with the perception,
of the people around them.
But they are the most beloved people to
Allah Subh'anahu Wa Ta-A'la
So realizing that the value assigned by people,
is not the same as the value assigned by
Allah Subh'anahu Wa Ta-A'la.
And so if you're prioritizing Allah,
then you're winning,
you're winning at the end of the day.
And you realize like Ibrahim 'Alayhi Salaam,
when he's catapulted into a fire subhanAllah.
he's realizing that Allah Subh'anahu Wa Ta-A'la is Al-Azeez
He's the one who, who is the, the
the source of all honor he's Al-Muaz
the one who bestows that
you know, that honor.
And so when we realize that,
that can be a very powerful way,
of being able to survive,
dealing with criticism.
- So can you reflect back on a time,
when your reputation was on the line,
but you still found the resilience to get through that,
and found Allah's reward.
Please share with us in the comments.
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