In 2014, a family in Iceland was told they couldn’t renew their 10-year-old
daughter’s passport. The problem? It listed her name as Stúlka, Icelandic for “Girl.”
The family had a similar issue with their 12-year-old son’s passport,
which listed his name as “Boy.” Icelandic parents must name their
children an approved name in the National Register of Person. In addition to not being a potential
source of humiliation (so presumably no FartFace Gunarrson's are running around Reykjavik),
the name must also meet criteria that’s more specific to Iceland. It can only include
letters in the Icelandic alphabet and must be able to conform to the language grammatically.
The name “Harriet,” which is what “Girl” actually went by, fails on that second front. And there’s
no letter C in the Icelandic alphabet to correctly spell “Duncan,” her brother’s given name—hence the
passport that listed his name as “Boy.” Or, more accurately, its Icelandic equivalent:
Drengur. Apparently being a boy named boy did not register as a potential source of humiliation.
Hi, I’m Erin McCarthy. Welcome to the List Show. “Harriet” and “Duncan” (or
is that “Boy” and “Girl”?) are by far the most innocuous of the banned baby names
we’ll be discussing today. We’ll go over some of the most delicious, punctuational,
and flat-out bizarre names people have tried (and often failed) to name their kids. Let’s
get started.
In 2015, a French couple apparently wanted their daughter to grow up to be sweet and popular,
so they decided to name her Nutella. One French judge wasn’t having it,
insisting that the name could lead to “mockery and disobliging remarks.” It
was ruled that the child’s name be shortened to the considerably less tasty sounding “Ella.”
Speaking of naming children after food, a couple in New Zealand intended to name their twins “Fish
and Chips.” I see nothing wrong with this. Who wouldn't want to be in a room with fish
and chips?! ...Maybe I'm just hungry. Either way, New Zealand prevented the couple from
giving these names to their kids, marking a rare occasion when two names were banned as a pairing.
The name “Spinach” is outlawed in Australia. For the record, “Kale” appears to be acceptable. But
please, parents, if you're going to name your kid Kale, remember to give them a
little massage before you put them inside a salad. No, wait, I'm definitely hungry.
In January 2015, a French judge intervened when a couple attempted to name their child
“Fraise,” the French word for “strawberry.” The judge claimed that Fraise was an unfit
name because the child could become the butt of some jokes. Figuratively speaking. The
idiomatic phrase “ramène ta fraise,” means something like “get over here.” The parents,
having insisted that they were only trying to give their daughter an original name,
opted for “Fraisine” instead. Maybe Spinach and Fraisine’s parents have the right idea. If
you’re going to name your kid after food, might as well go for a healthy option.
Unless that healthy option is “Sex Fruit,” which was almost the name of a very unlucky
child before the New Zealand government came to their rescue. (Though being raised by parents who
thought that was a good idea in the first place probably presented its own set of challenges.)
“Anal” was another entry on New Zealand’s list of banned names. If there’s a story there,
I’m afraid to hear it. Let’s hope it was an Alan who just got autocorrected. Or maybe the
parents were going the Nutella route and wanted their kid to grow up with a type A personality.
In 2014, officials from Sonora, Mexico, compiled a list of banned baby names from
the state’s newborn registries. One of the unfortunate names that made the cut
(sorry) was “Circuncisión,” Spanish for circumcision. The officials snipped that,
uh…nipped that in the bud, deciding to ban the name from that point forward.
“Robocop” also made the list, and while citizens are no longer allowed to give
this name to their children, I’d like to believe there’s at least one kid out there
channeling Peter Weller at any given moment. Completely necessary sidenote: In researching
this script, our fact-checker Austin discovered that,
after making it as an actor, Peter Weller went back to school and got
a Ph.D. in Italian Renaissance Art History. Dr. Robocop: we salute you.
Denmark is another country with a pre-approved baby name list.
If a parent wants to name their kid something outside the approved list,
they need explicit permission from the government. Each year approximately 250
potential names are rejected—among them, the moniker, one of them being “Monkey.”
You won’t find any Prince Williams in France unless the Prince of Wales
himself is on vacation. A French court barred a couple from southern France from
giving the name to their child in 2015, saying that the name would cause harm
to the child and be a heavy burden. Sorry to the future king, I guess.
On the same day, a couple tried to name their kid Mini Cooper—which is,
I believe, what British people call the show Young Sheldon. Since the court
didn’t allow parents to copy the name of a notable human, you won't be surprised
to learn that they wouldn’t let them name a kid after a notable automobile, either.
Cyanide could be a lovely name for a baby girl. So thought a woman from Wales, anyway. She attempted
to name her daughter after the poison, explaining that it was "responsible for killing Hitler and
Goebbels and I consider that this was a good thing." That is...a surprisingly sound argument.
Still, the Court of Appeals stepped in and killed that possibility as quickly as … well, you get it.
About a year after the events of 9/11, a Turkish couple living in Cologne, Germany,
felt inspired to name their child after Osama Bin Laden. German officials, citing the section
of their naming guidelines which states that all names "must not be likely to lead to humiliation,"
refused to let that happen. What’s more, German law prohibited foreign names that
are illegal in the parents’ home country, and this particular moniker was illegal in Turkey.
Norway is yet another country that regulates what parents can name their child. One Norwegian mother
was fined about $210 for using the unapproved name “Gesher,” and sent to jail when she didn’t pay.
She protested, saying that she had been instructed to name her son Gesher, the Hebrew word for
bridge, in a dream she had. I think if some divine dream entity appears telling you to name your kid
something, you should get a pass. As long as the dream doesn’t include the phrase “sex fruit.”
Speaking of the supernatural, one baby born in Japan in the early 90s was named Akuma,
which is Japanese for “devil.” Baby Akuma caused such a controversy that the Prime Minister’s
cabinet got involved. The Justice Minister at the time spoke out against government intervention,
saying, “It is not appropriate to instruct parents to change children’s names without
legal basis.” Regardless, the name Akuma eventually became illegal in Japan.
The Malaysian government published a list of banned monikers after receiving an influx of
people applying to change their given names. One of the names in question was Chow Tow,
which translates to “smelly head.” Chow Tow’s parents basically did
future bullies’ jobs for them with that name.
Someone I couldn’t imagine getting bullied, on the other hand, is Chief Maximus. Picture this:
there’s a playground gang of kids named Max, and Chief Maximus is
their leader. Or at least, he would’ve been, had Australia not banned the name.
A spectacular name that was banned in New Zealand is “Talula Does The Hula
From Hawaii.” Yes, that’s a six-word name. The New Zealand government hated it so much,
they assumed guardianship of the 9-year-old girl who held the moniker in order to ensure that a
more appropriate name was found for her. That’s right, she went a full nine years as “Talula Does
The Hula From Hawaii.” Let’s hope she never had to fill out her full name on a Scantron.
Among New Zealand’s list of banned names that people apparently tried giving to
their children is “Full Stop,” spelled with one grammatical symbol and no letters. I’d
hate to be the substitute teacher taking attendance with a Full Stop in the class.
As is the case with many countries, China doesn’t allow symbols or numerals to be
included in baby names. The at symbol is pronounced “ai-ta” in Chinese,
which sounds similar to a phrase meaning “love him.” One couple felt the symbol was a fitting
name for their son. I, personally, applaud the word play, but the Chinese government disagreed.
Baby names featuring numbers are also forbidden in many countries. In an attempt to find a loophole,
someone in New Zealand tried to name their child III in Roman numerals.
But like many a wannabe singer/songwriter’s third album of the same title, it was unsuccessful.
In 2007, a baby girl from Sweden was baptized under this heavy metal name, but tax officials
eventually deemed it inappropriate. Hard disagree. Eventually, authorities came to their senses
and let the little girl rock out with her unique name. Unique for a while,
at least—apparently there are now a few Metallicas running and/or crawling around the country.
Ironically, Sweden is also one country where it’s illegal to
name your baby after the beloved furniture store,
IKEA. I wonder if “Billy” is still up for grabs. “Blåhaj” has a nice ring to it. Djungelskog?
Sweden’s notoriously strict naming laws were met with protest. One couple decided
to retaliate by making their child’s name a captcha code from hell. This name,
defiantly pronounced “Albin,” was rejected. Eat your heart out,
Elon Musk. The parents later submitted the name with the same pronunciation but rewritten as “A."
That was rejected as well. What’s the most bizarre baby
name you’ve heard? Let us know in the comments below. Thanks for watching!