- [Instructor] Hey, Psych2Goers,
and welcome back to our channel.
Thank you all so much for the love that you've given us.
Your ongoing support has helped us make psychology
and mental health more accessible to everyone.
So thank you.
Now let's continue.
As humans we're constantly growing and changing.
Have you ever found yourself becoming distant
from someone you used to be close friends with?
Whether it's due to different life goals
our ever shifting personalities or a location change,
it's never easy to have to let someone go.
Outgrowing a friendship is also a sign of maturity
and the ability to recognize what you want in a good friend.
While it's undoubtedly sad,
drifting apart from a friend is natural
and may even turn out to be a good thing in the long run.
Do you think you can still salvage your friendship
or is your friendship no longer compatible?
To answer that,
here are five signs you've outgrown your friendship.
Number one, your values conflict.
As you go through life and gain new experiences,
your values and morals will change.
We often tend to seek friends with similar beliefs.
So if you find that you no longer agree with
what your friend does or says
it may be a sign you've outgrown them.
Of course you shouldn't stop being friends with someone
just because you happen to disagree with something.
But if it's a fundamental disagreement
about a topic that's really important to you
you may find yourself wanting to spend more time
around like-minded people.
Number two, you don't spend time together anymore.
Simply put, when you like someone enough
you always try to make time for them.
If you and your friend are routinely making excuses
not to hang out,
it may be a sign you no longer enjoy each other's company.
Your interests, senses of humor
or personalities may have fallen out of compatibility
with each other,
while it's painful to go through,
it's a sign you've outgrown your friendship
and are wanting to seek out friends who compliment
and balance you out more.
Number three, you don't tell each other everything
like you used to.
As cliche is it sounds,
friends often do tell each other everything.
If you're holding back from telling your friends something
due to fear of being criticized or them not understanding,
it's probably a sign you're no longer comfortable
around them.
Friendship is based upon mutual trust,
communication, and respect.
And if you find yourself becoming wary of your friend,
it's likely time to try and move on.
After all everyone deserves to have someone
they can confide in without fear of judgment or shame.
Number four, things don't feel natural with them anymore.
How do you feel around them?
Friendship is about having a healthy, emotional connection
with someone.
If you two lose that connection over time,
your conversations might become dull.
You'll have less energy around them
and the tension between you two will increase.
In the end,
a friendship should make you happy
and be an enjoyable experience for you both.
If it isn't sustainable any longer, that's okay.
And you can allow yourself to move on.
Number five,
would you still be friends with them if you met them today?
Think back to who you were five years ago.
Chances are you're a completely different person
with new hobbies, personality traits, and goals.
You've evolved and changed,
which means the people that you want
around you have likely changed too.
If you met your old friend as the person you are today,
would you two still be compatible?
If the answer is no,
then you've probably moved past the friendship.
After all, sometimes the only thing connecting two people
is their past together.
The process of outgrowing friends
and finding new people is never ending.
As all of us are constantly changing.
Knowing this, you don't have to blame yourself
for drifting apart from a friend.
While both of you can make your best effort
to maintain your friendship,
it's common for people to slowly go distant.
It's completely natural and normal.
If anything, it means you're evolving
to become a more balanced and mature version of yourself.
Are you currently experiencing a change in friends?
If so, how's that going?
Let us know in the comments below.
Please like and share this video if it helped you
and you think it can help someone else too.
The studies and references used
are listed in the description below.
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Thank you for watching and we'll see you next time.