Hey guys, welcome back
so this video is on how to say positive and it is a video that I desperately need right now
because I've not been the most positive or happy or calm person that I can be
in the past couple of days or week
and although I've done a pretty good job at containing it inside here and it's not showing externally,
it's still like mental turmoil, tornadoes, tsunamis going on here and like it's not the best feeling
this video is also inspired by a few of your questions on my AMAs a couple weeks ago that I did on Instagram stories
And the first one is how do you have a positive and grateful mindset even at your lowest?
the first thing is to celebrate the small wins and what that looks like for me is celebrating the fact that I'm
alive, that I woke up this morning, that I'm breathing, that there's a roof over my head and there's food in my stomach, and that
I get to talk to a camera, upload it onto the computer and have access to this thing called the internet or Wi-Fi and then being able
to post it on this thing called YouTube and then you guys can watch this video on this illuminated screen whether it's your phone or your
laptop, and it's like just saying that out loud and reminding myself of all the things that I already have
versus all the things I want or all the things that I feel that I need
It's already so reassuring and so grounding and humbling that
there's so much beauty around us at all times. It's just when we're so fixated and stuck in our own heads
we forget that there's beauty and there's love and there's happiness and joy all around it's because we...
I think we really like separate ourselves from that when we're so caught up in here
The second thing is to remember that it's all temporary. Life itself, feelings, positive feelings, negative feelings
It's impossible to feel one way all the time. It's impossible to be positive all the time
It's impossible to be productive all the time. It's impossible to be happy all the time
and I think it's that unrealistic expectation we set for ourselves that like "I need to be this all the time"
like "I need to strive to be like X Y & Z all the time"
the discrepancy between what we want versus who we are as humans and the fact that it's not possible
That discrepancy is what causes a lot of uneasiness and stress in our lives
and to know that life comes in seasons that life comes in cycles and that you need to feel not good sometimes
for you to break out of it eventually. It's kind of like in computer games you need to struggle for a bit
before you can level up but struggling and pain and (slowly) "uncomfortableness"
and being uncomfortable is usually always good signs that you're about to break through and something awesome is about to happen
So the third thing is to focus on what's most important. If you're able to take a step back
and take yourself out of your head and just remind yourself of what's most important to you
So for me, it's you know, my family parents are okay, they're doing great, you know, my health.
I'm alive, I'm breathing. That's awesome
I'm trying to be the best student of my spiritual practice as I can even though I've been kind of slacking
recently and not doing as best as I could be, I'm not meditating as much
I'm not reading as much, I'm still trying
and that trying and that effort, although it could be better, it's good enough
and just taking a step back and reminding yourself of these things
Just me saying it out loud just now has helped me so much to be like, "okay. Those are what's important to you
so everything else that you're stressing about that you're worrying about, this video that you just spent the past
like two hours trying to make and you've been struggling trying to make, like it's all it's okay like it's all gonna be fine
because you already have what's most important to you and as long as you're trying and doing your best that's okay"
Next point is change what you can and let go of what you can't so if you're stressed if you're not feeling the best
Why aren't you feeling the best? Is it because of school?
Is it because of work? Is it because of some relationship? Is it because of...
Whatever it is, what can I do about it? Can I call my friend? Can I study a little more?
Can I spend an extra hour today just unplugging and taking better care of myself? Can I call my mom?
If there's actionable steps that you can take, take it
by all means like do that. Be proactive and do that thing
But if whatever it is that's stressing you out is something out of your control
it's something that you can't do anything about then... let it go
I know it's so much easier said than done
but the more you try to exercise, the more you try to practice this, it will get a lot easier over time
Next thing is to take five minutes out of your day to just do that thing you know will help you feel better
For me it's journaling and meditating. Meditating is something that I just
I've been slacking so much which totally shows by how not chill and calm I've been feeling
as well as journaling, I have not been keeping up with my five minute journal
because "I'm busy" and "I'm traveling" and "I don't have time" but like those are all excuses I can—
It's like what Tony Robbins said if you don't have five or ten minutes in the mornings to yourself
then like you don't have a life; like if you can't carve out five minutes of your day
and I'm saying this to myself like if you can't even do something that you know will help you for five minutes
then like why are you even doing anything? So spend five minutes right now
Pause the video to go do the thing that you know will help you or you can do that after you finish this video
So the last thing and I think this is something that I need to hear myself a lot
is that despite the voices in your head, despite whoever you've convinced yourself you are,
despite you know everything going on in here just pause
Give yourself a pat on the back and just tell yourself you're doing great
You've been doing great and you will continue to do great and it's okay for you to feel not okay every once in a while
it's okay for you to not be the most positive all the time because it's human
and at the end of the day, we really are our biggest critics. We really are—
We're so hard on ourselves like... all the things we want to do, all the things that we feel we can do better on
all the things that we... I don't know; there's just so many things that we want as humans
that it's what makes us so unhappy all the time
So I think at the end of the day it's really accepting yourself, loving yourself
taking better care of yourself, and trying to let go of attachments to different things that are pulling you in different directions
This is a concept in Buddhism which is whatever it is that you're attached to
will drag you down in some way, shape, or form
The second question is what is your best tip for staying positive? This quote by Steve Jobs is one of my favorite quotes
[Rowena's voice]
Meditating on death may be kind of like a morbid thing to say
but I really do think that when we really understand the fact that our time here is finite
and that life is fragile and that anything can happen at any moment
why not seize the day and why not focus all your energy and attention on what is most important to you
and being positive if it's all going to end eventually?
and I think what that... and I know this video is— (unintelligible) it was really hard for me to make
I don't know if it's like the mental state that I'm currently in or just the fact that I haven't been meditating
and sleeping properly and just all over the place, overworking myself,
whatever it is, I hope this video was helpful, um...
Yeah, I don't know I love you guys thank you guys for being here
I really appreciate every single one of you guys for tuning in every week to just listen to my ramblings
because you know you guys doing this is very encouraging and inspiring for me to keep doing what I'm doing
(quickly) My camera's about to die, I love you and I'll see you guys in next week's video
(laughing) Bye!
I'm like (weird noise) My mental state is like my voice(?)