G'day, A.J. Mahari here again i shouldn't be smiling but what are you going to do i mean
no sense getting frustrated so um i saw something yeah it's on reddit i'm just gonna start naming
stuff from places and things and yeah um somebody said eventually there it's a headline okay a title
i mean quote eventually there will come a time when you will need to grey rock your own mind
the mind your ex has destroyed your ex with bpd has destroyed and inflicted with horrible things
well we may as well add infected to that too right because that's oh so real as well and that's the
right thing to do so yes according to somebody another one of these bass experts out there when
i say that i'm not trying to go oh i'm super the expert but i'm just like this is ridiculous
okay it is let's just keep it real and let's look at ridiculous for what ridiculous is because
people keep bringing me different varieties of ridiculous here on the channel and please don't
feel encumbered by how i'm responding to comments recently and may well be in the future too
because i don't mean anybody in disrespect it's about the information
and it's about the misinformation more to the point so eventually there'll come a time when
you will need to gray rock your own mind because you've been with somebody with bpd
and by the way i know they hurt people that's not funny but then the person
said and that's the right thing to do i don't even know what great rock your own mind means
but i wouldn't recommend it because normally really to function you kind of have to have your
mind on board so why why am i talking about this well because that is just i didn't even read it
i don't care what they said beyond that i think that's all i need to know at this moment in time
thank you but the point is it's like the internet is a place that's gone a tad mad just a tad mad
about people with bpd yeah they hurt people yeah wounded people hurt people no i'm not a bpd
apologist no i'm not here to defend that but the utter absurdity and i mean no offense to anyone
but this is about information misinformation and things like you better learn to grey rock your
own mind after the borderline destroys it do people with bpd do codependence
do people with bp do you think they have that much power really really
they lack a self they can be very harmful to people yeah they're not good for your health
i think i have over 500 videos or maybe minus a few for people with bpd in a playlist which there
may be more coming soon because hey let's just keep it all balanced you know what i'm saying
the vilification of people dpd by many not all people with codependency can't take responsibility
for their own stuff what's up with that i'm just saying right because if you've stayed
with somebody with bpd for so long in this day and age people get online and they google stuff right
like my girlfriend did my wife did my boyfriend my husband did blah blah blah whatever they did right
why would anybody do that this is where some people a lot of people start off nothing wrong
with that google it and then they fall into this whole world about borderline personality disorder
oh that's gotta be it okay so maybe a lot of times that is it right but the bottom line is it's not
like everybody with bpd is the same number one got your untreated people with bp those are the people
that most of you have been with that most people are talking about all over the internet
it's not the people that are getting better it's not the people that are human there's examples
of those people out there but they're not that they're not what everybody's talking about not
what i'm describing on this channel either and then yeah is recovery from bpd possible
yeah and because i saw such ridiculous outlandish overly unbelievably stigmatizing answers on quora
it made me have to write there again no i'm just kidding you obviously i made that choice and i'm
responsible for it right because because like as if a person with bp has the power okay so so they
can really hurt you and and and yes they have these relational difficulties oh and then some
and i don't mean to make light of that at all but they that they would destroy your mind wow that's
some kind of awesome power i don't mean awesome in a good way but that is like spectacular power
so here's the thing some people with codependency because i'm not saying everybody's codependency
is the same the way that so many but not everybody with codependency says everybody
with bpd is the same so after the last video i did you know with the codependent comment
about his neuronic bpd mess being all of a sudden somebody who manipulated the heck out
of him because he didn't have any part in any of it right and then gave her money and then she took
the money but he didn't get what he wanted for the money and then we're not talking about you
know but he wanted you know some attention to be seen and some affection maybe he just even
wanted appreciation for giving the money but he doesn't get it and then he says she has a trait
of dark triad called machiavellianism which isn't a trait and i'm here to say again bpd is not
the female variant aspd just because the apa and the pseudoscience says so i'm sitting here
waiting for the proof they don't have it they never will have it they have ideology so
now somebody on reddit says i'm sure he's an expert too just saying no offense against you
people that are exes of people of bpd at all right i mean i'm here to help you i might get a little
silly now and again um i don't know what that's about anyway serious issue isn't it until somebody
says like the last comment i responded to there's another one coming by the way they're gonna
keep coming they should be i hope educational but it might be a little bit fun too or maybe not
we'll see what the blowback is i'm not overly concerned one way or the other because i try
to you know i try i'm a humble person and all the trolls are laughing now but i try to really bring
accurate information here to help people and i think i do that i think a lot of people appreciate
that a lot of people don't like what i do don't like me oh okay whatever but i draw the line
at some of the absurdities out there and i'm hoping that more you out there with codependence
will realize the absurdity because i don't assume you all think the way of this person like unre i
don't know who they are but if if somebody thinks that a person with bpd destroyed their mind and
they need to gray rock their own mind like what they need to get to a therapist yesterday or the
day before that or maybe 10 years ago what i mean by that is when you do your first google
search when you know and you start to learn about bpd and i'm not going to speak on how much people
want to know and get in you know and scotched in that and to what degree and when is it healthy
and when does it stop being healthy but people with bp have a lot of responsibility for things
that they never chose and that didn't that they didn't aren't responsible for that happen in their
childhood and then when they hit adulthood they have responsibility for that right okay
many of them can't meet that responsibility but people with codependency have responsibility too
and i know a lot of you know that but some of you have you ever thought of it because there
are some people out there i don't think they've thought of it so blame the person with bpd for
this out the other thing that well for whatever they've done that you can't hold them accountable
for and can't get closure about and it's really painful absolutely got that i know that i've
been on the other side of that too lest people forget i came back from the creepy other side
yeah these divisions in humanity are archaic and what people with codependency need to learn
rather than the borderline destroyed your mind and now you got to grayrock your own mind
i'm sorry i find that hilarious i do not the issues surrounding it but that alone
is absurd but yet funny um i don't use enough humor in this channel perhaps my humor will
come across really well in these videos or this video yeah whatever um it doesn't matter what
i do there's always a critic out there as if there's only one anyway so the point is this
people with codependency many not all
are taking this way too far abdicating personal responsibility you know oh the borderline did
this borderline did that therefore the borderline is this the borderline is that
i'm not here as a bpd apologist and i'm here to say they're not all the same and whatever your
experience is of a person with bpd fair enough absolutely that's your experience and i'm not
here to invalidate that in any way i'm here to validate it two videos to help you out with that
but that you need to gray rock your own mind because somebody on reddit said so because the bpd
destroyed their mind what does that even mean talk about histrionic type of talk about hyperbolic
okay i should get to my point right let's not be absurd people with codependency have
responsibility once you know you're with somebody with bpd and and and for all the myriad of reasons
that are super serious and i'm not judging and i have compassion and i understand that people can't
extricate extricate themselves from that due to childhood woundiness and things that are in their
unconscious that many people with codependency aren't aware of yet many people are working on
i work with clients so please don't think i'm trying to be flippant or rude or you know um
in any way um unempathic that's not the case but people with bpd i think just this idea that the
person i'm sorry it's crazy silly it's it's it's beyond the pale i'm like if you i hope you can
laugh at that i really do i hope that brings a smile to your face even if you're in agony right
now because guess what you can be really hurt you can get blindsided by people at bpd absolutely
but they're just not guilty of everything they're accused of they can't destroy your mind
they really affect people with codependency and different amounts of woundedness in their life
too and they affect people in different ways to different degrees it's impacting
it's horrible there's no excuse for it but they can't destroy your mind
and if that's even humanly possible i would say that by that point then in this era of
information and all the disinformation around the information on the internet about bpd etc
when is it the codependent's responsibility
to take in the information and create the change in your life that you need
before your mind gets destroyed i smile there because it's ridiculous that can't happen
get really hurt yeah but so anyway before you feel like a person with bpd's destroyed your
mind and you need to grey rock your own mind whatever the he double hockey sticks that means
please if you have codependency and you're really struggling with somebody with bpd or
you got ghosted or you're the x and you're not sure if it's on or off or over or not
please realize you have your own moodiness codependency is childhood adverse experience
and woundedness two to varying degrees for people across the spectrum of codependency
just like bpd is what it is or not really but sort of what you know the way we use the language to
describe what it is sort of um is you know not everybody with bp is the same some are
more severely impacted some are less severely impacted some get treatment and really change
and heal well maybe not heal but grow and relate better and some people heal and recover
so this is a message about codependent's responsibility
and the reality that once you know what you're dealing with
maybe you need a little more information on that fair enough i got over 500 videos on this channel
400 some odd of them are gonna tell you things like the borderline can't love you the untreated
borderline can't love you doesn't love you can't attach to you won't attach to you won't love you
is seeking identity through you etc etc etc and all the explanation that goes with that some
people just come along like the last commenter come along to the channel i don't think they watch
very many videos that's a shame doing all these videos people gotta watch them i just kidding
point is people with codependency really need to wake up to realize you have a lot more personal
responsibility in how you continue to be hurt by a person with bpd after you know what's going on and
you stick around for more because that's where the codependency kicks in i get that and that's
where people aren't really able to take enough of their own personal responsibility guess why
because codependency is a dysfunction among all the things that it is it's a dysfunctional
relationship too and we sell and you continue to externalize out what you need onto that person
with bpd particularly and specifically because they're emotionally unavailable
to give any of it to you they can't give it to you so you pursue it even harder this is what people
with codependency need to wake up and go yeah that's what i did or yeah that's what i'm doing
and then what are you gonna do so that that's not what you're doing anymore
before you think that somebody with bpd destroyed your mind so you better gray rock your own mind
that's utter nonsense it's funny that is funny but i'm sure it comes out of somebody's pain
who is maybe desperately and been negatively impacted and has changed
but who never knew themselves in the first place this is the issue of codependency
people don't know themselves as much as they think they do and then you get with a person with bpd or
cluster b because it's something that happened in your childhood and it's somehow all their fault
doesn't work that way anyway i hope that my new style is not new style but it could pop
up once in a while lord knows i've held it down for about as long as it possibly can
now here it is whatever it is um keeping it real to help people heal some people may like it some
people may not like it i'll still do other videos i'll see more normal again i promise
or whatever you think i was in the first place um and just an add-on here real quick where am i
at yeah i was going too long point is i i got a new website in the works right now
i'm going to be um hopefully transferring over aj maharajio to that so i don't have
to try to go back to like 300 plus videos and change links um but you're going to want to
stay tuned to hear about this channel no not this channel i'll be okay um it's been a long workday
uh about this new website coming it's going to really talk a lot about all kinds of different
types of relationships with people bpd probably some added other information about
other forms of cluster b and other things and challenges in life and also a lot of information
for people to code pencey and i'm going to be getting some courses and ebooks done soon i
keep saying that but i'm really going to do it i got some of it done so watch for that new website
watch for me i'll announce it here and it probably will have at least one domain directing to it
there will be ajmah.co and you'll land on the website and be called something else but more to
the point it'll be called that for only one single reason it's a phrase that makes sense and it's a
way to um give an umbrella term to something to do with bpd relationships and knowing about them
understanding them why they don't work how they won't work with untreated people bpd and it just
it's gonna be a nice umbrella encapsulation uh a more organized way i can bring to you on a website
a myriad of more resources and information anyway borderlines can't destroy your mind
unless somehow you keep letting them but i don't think they're destroying your mind
they can break your heart for sure can't destroy your mind and i don't recommend anybody try to
gray rock your own mind i think that's another way that you could absolutely lose yourself
anyway take care message is codependents need to take responsibility to find your own healing
process to get into the change that you need in fact if you need help like lots of people do
to break that unhealthy bond and to get yourself gone
and to put yourself first take care as always and don't try to great rock your own mind