Lazy: TF2 is perfect. There is nothing wrong with it. The art style is coherent...
*MPPHHHH*
Random crits don't exist...
*R O C K E T*
The gameplay is well-rounded and competitive...
Friendly Heavy: POOTIS
Lazy: Who's there?
[out of breath] Okay...
Remember what your therapist said...
Friendlies don't exist.
Friendlies don't--
--exist.
[gasp]
LazyPurple: Where am I?
Okay, everything is a sandwich.
That's okay.
Remember your therapy: friendlies don't exist.
People play TF2 for its interactive combat and subtle mechanics.
Everything's gonna be alright.
Please...
No...
Oh, god, please, I don't want any trouble!
Look, I'll dance for your amusement!
Please, release me from your cruel hooks of torture!
No words can accurately describe the pain of dragging 20 Russians men dancing.
Please! Wait, no! Where am I?
All of you -- all of you, stay back!
I'm warning you, don't come any closer!
[pistol gunshots] LazyPurple: No, no!
N-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o!
[drawn out Heavy laugh]
LazyPurple: Hold on guys, here I come.
I'm, uh.. Just give me... Wha--?
What is that sound?
What IS that?
[sad music] *R.I.P. SoundSmith :( *
Man, I love these guys, But sometimes it's a bit much with all the explosions and the dancing
And I can't even get through. There's so many of 'em!
Eh, sometimes you know I just need a moment to myself. Some time to think and decompress
just relax and---
Oh, I can't move. I'm stuck.
Well, I'm sure someone'll come lookin' for me.
*BONG*
Okay guys, I get it. Funny alright? I'm stuck. You can come out now, the joke's over.
I've been yelling for 30 minutes.
Oh--
Whoa, woah, woah, woah, woah. What's that? What's that?
What's that sound? Is that you guys? Come on, this isn't funny anymore.
HOLY HECK!
NO NO NO NO! Get back! This can't be happening again! Please! I don't want to die this way!
Get back!
I'll kill all of you!
Don't doubt me, I played in a UGC solar team!
Back ye demons! The spirit of Gabe Newell compels you!
[sobbing] Get awaaaaay!
[Demomen dying, trombone]
Demoman: MEDIC!
Demoman: I did wha' ah could! :c
[LazyPurple gasping for air]
I can't breathe!
So-- [gasping] So high up!
No, not this dream again!
No! All of you!
Don't do it, please!
I'm falling...
Always... falling...
*ded*
*rip Medic birb*
LazyPurple: I had that dream again...
The one where I'm floating next to a skyscraper and 30 people are dancing on the edge...
Every time, I tell them not to do it. And every time they do...
I feel so powerless...
It all started when SoundSmith said that thing to me!
SoundSmith: Lazy Purple. Santa Claus isn't real.
Did he mean that?
*SoundSmiths dies again*
I don't know what do believe anymore...
Engineer: Will you look at that?
It was a Christmas miracle.
I could have sworn it was Santa Claus with all his reindeer
[Music: Erik Satie - Gymnopédie No.1]
LazyPurple: Heh...
Maybe there is a little bit of magic in the world.
What? You thought the video was done?
You think all of that stuff went off without a hitch?
In your DREAMS, pal!
I've got a blooper and a half for ya and if you ask me, they're just as important as the finished product.
LazyPurple: Okay, this is perfect. This is really good, this is really good.
Now everyone who can--
Everyone who can, equip your sandwich and don't have it on the floor, please.
You're doing me a huge favour here.
SoundSmith: Here, here. You know what? Jus-- Somebody on BLU shoot me.
SoundSmith: Shoot me.
Based: Yeah. [Burp]
Lazypurple: Woah, woah, woah!
[Wheezing]
SoundSmith: [Laughing] No, no! Oh God! Not that way!
LazyPurple: REALLY good idea SoundSmith.
Text to Speech voice: Are you sure we're going the right way, Lazy?
Lazy TTS: I'm waiting for you in this hole. LOL
Text to Speech voice: I KNEW IT.
Female TTS: We aren't going towards him.
Lazy TTS: LMAO, you clowns.
Will from Afar: SOUND SMITH YOU ARE FIRED.
LazyPurple: Alright, bundle up as close as you can.
[Scout falling]
LazyPurple: Damnit, Scout!
LazyPurple: Woah!
LazyPurple: Get saved!
Zera Foulke: [Laughing] Yeah, who the fuck?
LazyPurple: Dude, what a catch! Holy heck!
* :oooo *
LazyPurple: Waffles you can't be a--
[Laughs]
LazyPurple: Waffles and--
[Laughs again]
LazyPurple:These ostriches cannot be here! Get out of here! Please!
SoundSmith: [Laughing]
Zera Foulke: Goddamnit.
SoundSmith: [Laughing] And they just fuckin' drop out of the sky!
LazyPurple: BLU Engie.
LazyPurple: You hook--
LazyPurple: To Crimson.
LazyPurple: Okay.
LazyPurple: RED yellow soldier.
LazyPurple: Uhhh, Spy here.
LazyPurple: Deep fried eggs...
LazyPurple: BLU Heavy...
TTS Voice: It sounds like he's playing battleship.
Will from Afar: I HOPE HE GETS A HIT.
Will from Afar: AND KILLS US ALL.
LazyPurple: SoundSmith get in there.
LazyPurple: Oh, look at you! Aren't you a cute Pyro?
SoundSmith: OMAE WA MOU SHINDEIRU.
Cute Pyro: NAnI?!
[Eagle Screaming]
LazyPurple: [Laughing] Screaming Eagle! You just can't stop your gag, can you?
LazyPurple: We get it, dude! We get the joke!
LazyPurple: Get in there!
*dispenser spam and more*
LazyPurple: What's happening?
LazyPurple: WHAT?!
SoundSmith: Oh Jesus...
[Screaming, various exclamations]
???: People are dying!
[Laughing Intensifies]
SoundSmith: Everybody fucking dies: the anime.
LazyPurple: The great news is that this is video worthy.
LazyPurple: Aaalright.
LazyPurple: Stop moving, stop moving so we can organise this.
LazyPurple: Oh, actually Barble, you are actually excluded from all activities because of your ridiculous appearance.
Deep Fried Eggs + Crimson Star: [Laughs]
Zera Foulke: RIP.
Deep Fried Eggs: He looks like a cucumber! Crimson Star: I think he's pretty cute. Heavy: [Crying]
LazyPurple: [Laughing] There he goes!
LazyPurple: [Further Laughter] There he goes!
Deep Fried Eggs: [Laughing]
Deep Fried Eggs: He died of shame.
LazyPurple: [Laughing] He didn't even say anything!
Deep Fried Eggs: Oh no...
LazyPurple: Oh hoh hoh, noooo! Deep Fried Eggs: Oh no...
LazyPurple: Oh hoh hoh, noooo!
LazyPurple: He's come back to wreak havoc!
LazyPurple: [Laughing] Oh no! He's gonna destroy us all!
[People talking unintelligibly]
Crimson Star: Kill it!
LazyPurple: [Laughing] Oh my God!
LazyPurple: At least he left behind a beautiful corpse! [Laughing]
LazyPurple: Alright, Waffles, this is the shot.
LazyPurple: This is the shot of your life!
LazyPurple: Can you hit it?
LazyPurple: You got this!
LazyPurple: [Laughs]
LazyPurple: Okay! Alright! It's real, it's real I think!
LazyPurple: Alright [??] launch!
LazyPurple: Liftoff in three... Wait, what happened?
LazyPurple: The tree...?
LazyPurple: Okay okay okay!
LazyPurple: Liftoff in three!
LazyPurple: Two!
LazyPurple: One!
LazyPurple: These trees! No, the trees!
LazyPurple: I don't even wanna know what's like to be part of it.
Zera Foulke: It'd be a shame if someone were to ruin it...
Crimson Star: No, don't!
LazyPurple: Hey, you wouldn't! Crimson Star: No, don't!
[Music: Quincy Jones- Ironside Theme]
LazyPurple: Someone's gonna do it. Someone's gonna mess it up.
[Music: Quincy Jones- Ironside Theme]
LazyPurple: [Laughing] Oh my god... SoundSmith: OH NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO Zera Foulke: I didn't die!
LazyPurple: Uh, everyone that's NOT SoundSmith...
Machineseven: A special corner for just us! Let's go!
LazyPurple: Yeah! Everyone come to the special corner and...
LazyPurple: Pretend you don't exist for 30 seconds.
Machineseven: Just for safety measures, you should probably freeze us 'cause I don't trust...
Machineseven: I don't trust anybody.
LazyPurple: I-I trust everyone to stay in the special corner.
LazyPurple: I-I'll put- I'll put this in the video if you all behave and sit in your special corner.
SoundSmith: Lazy Purple, Sounds--- Ah, fuck.
LazyPurple: [Laughing]
LazyPurple: SoundSmith isn't real?!
LazyPurple: What's goin' on little guy? Watcha lookin' at!
LazyPurple: Is it---? Are you scared?
LazyPurple: Is it scary? What's up?
Crimson Star: When is this video gonna be out?
LazyPurple: Oh!
LazyPurple: Oh, I see!
LazyPurple: Is this an alien encounter?
LazyPurple: Do you come in peace?
LazyPurple: Please, do you speak English?
LazyPurple: Is everything---? Are you invading or are you helping?
LazyPurple: Wait, aliens came to planet Earth and all they wanna know is when my next video's coming out?
Okay, I have a bit of an announcement but before I get to it I'd just like to say.
Thank you to everyone in the servers that helped. Almost everything we were able to organize
painlessly and anything that went wrong ended up being funny and in good faith, so it was a blast making this video
and uh...
I'm sure we'll be seeing some more of the silly servers in the future because they've just come up with so much funny stuff.
All right now for the announcement
We've got a fresh as heck new Discord for fans of my videos, the link is in the description. Drop on by, have some laughs,
share some life advice. Everyone down there is really wholesome and, uh, as long as you keep it nice. You'll be fine.
Thankfully you don't were to be an alien to know when my next video is! There's another video free right here
and if you'd like to subscribe you may do so.
Also I have a Twitter?