- AS YOU PROBABLY NOTICED,
MY BUSHES HAVE NEVER BEEN BUSHIER.
AND MY GARDENER...
AND MY GARDENER NICK IS SHOOTING THE SEQUEL TO "MAGIC MIKE,"
SO I'VE BEEN LOOKING FOR A TEMPORARY GARDENER,
AND IT'S A PRICELESS OPPORTUNITY,
MOSTLY BECAUSE THEY WON'T GET PAID.
AND I ASKED MY VIEWERS TO POST AUDITIONS ON ELLENTUBE.
I GOT TO SEE THINGS THAT I WILL NEVER FORGET.
NO MATTER HOW HARD I TRY.
LET'S TAKE A QUICK LOOK BACK.
[Sam Smith's "Stay With Me"]
[singing] - WON'T YOU STAY WITH ME
'CAUSE YOU'RE ALL I NEED
THIS AIN'T LOVE IT'S CLEAR TO SEE
BUT DARLING, STAY WITH ME
WHY AM I SO EMOTIONAL?
NO, IT'S NOT A GOOD LOOK GAIN SOME SELF-CONTROL
THIS AIN'T LOVE IT'S CLEAR TO SEE
BUT DARLING, STAY WITH ME
[audience applauds and cheers]
- IS IT OVER?
IT'S OVER? GREAT.
OKAY...
IT WASN'T EASY, BUT I PICKED THREE FINALISTS.
I FLEW THEM HERE AND PUT THEM UP
IN ONE OF THE TOP MOTELS ON SANTA MONICA BOULEVARD.
UM, BASED ON THE VIDEOS, I KNOW THAT THIS MIGHT GET
A LITTLE RACY FOR DAYTIME TV, AND I DON'T WANNA GET IN TROUBLE
WITH OUR CENSOR, SO I'VE HAD HIM BLINDFOLDED.
[audience laughing and applauding]
[laughs]
ALL RIGHT, PLEASE--PLEASE HOLD YOUR APPLAUSE.
LET'S BRING OUT OUR FINALISTS.
OUR FIRST GARDENER STARTED OUT WITH JUST A HOE AND A DREAM.
HE SAYS--HE SAYS HE'LL DO WHATEVER IT TAKES
TO TRIM MY BUSHES, EVEN IF IT MEANS GETTING A LITTLE DIRTY.
HE ALSO SAYS HE HAS A GREEN THUMB,
BUT LET'S BE HONEST, WHO'S LOOKING AT HIS THUMB?
FROM LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA, SAY HELLO TO TEEGAN ROSE.
[audience cheers]
OUR NEXT GARDENER SAYS THAT AS A CHILD,
HE ALWAYS DREAMED OF BEING A PROFESSIONAL HULA HOOPER
OR A TEMPORARY GARDENER ON A DAYTIME TALK SHOW.
HE'S AN INSPIRATION TO ANYONE WHO DREAMS SMALL.
AND IF THIS DOESN'T WORK OUT,
HE'D LOVE TO TRIM DR. PHIL'S MUSTACHE.
FROM WASHINGTON, D.C., HERE'S MARCUS KENNY.
[audience cheering]
OUR FINAL GARDENER SENT IN A VIDEO
THAT CAUGHT THE EYE OF OUR CENSOR, MATT.
MATT TOOK THE VIDEO HOME AND WATCHED IT OVER 50 TIMES
TO MAKE SURE IT WAS OKAY.
I THINK HE'LL BE OKAY WITH HIM, TOO.
FROM CHATTANOOGA, TENNESSEE, THIS IS DEREK YATES.
[audience cheering]
- THAT CONCLUDES THE RUNWAY PORTION OF OUR COMPETITION.
OBVIOUSLY I CAN'T JUST PICK A GARDENER BASED ON HOW THEY LOOK
WITH THEIR SHIRTS OFF.
I COULD, BUT WE STILL HAVE SOME TIME TO FILL.
SO I AM GONNA ASK THEM SOME QUESTIONS.
COME ON BACK OUT HERE, MEN.
ALL RIGHT.
HI. ALL RIGHT.
TEEGAN, MY FIRST QUESTION TO YOU IS, UH...
EXPLAIN THE PROCESS OF PHOTOSYNTHESIS.
- PHOTOSYNTH-- - I'M KIDDING.
[all laughing] UM...
CAN YOU SPELL "GARDENER"?
- GARDENER.
G-A-R-D...
- ALMOST THERE. - N-E-R.
- YEP. - [laughs]
AND THANK YOU FOR THE OPPORTUNITY.
- WAIT, WHAT WAS IT AGAIN? - G-A-R-D-E-N-A-R.
E-R. UH, EH, NO.
- ONE OF THOSE WAS RIGHT. OKAY...
MARCUS, FINISH THIS POEM.
ROSES ARE RED, VIOLETS ARE BLUE...
- I LOVE YOU.
[laughs]
- THANK YOU. IT RHYMED, BUT YOU WERE
SUPPOSED TO FINISH THE POEM.
ALL RIGHT, DEREK, IF YOU WERE A TYPE OF PLANT,
WHAT WOULD IT BE? A NAUGHTY PINE,
A HORNY GOAT WEED,
OR A HONEYSUCKLE?
- I'D SAY A HONEYSUCKLE.
- ALL RIGHT. WHOO.
I DON'T KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS.
I--IT'S TOO HARD FOR ME TO CHOOSE A WINNER,
SO BY ROUND OF APPLAUSE,
LET'S START RIGHT HERE. TEEGAN?
MARCUS?
AND DEREK?
I THINK WE HAVE A WINNER.
DEREK, YOU ARE THE WINNER.
AND YOU HAVE THE TITLE OF MY TEMPORARY GARDENER.
ALL RIGHT, THAT MEANS YOU'RE GONNA GET A GOLDEN HOE
AND--HERE'S OUR GOLDEN HOE.
AND A $1,000 TARGET GIFT CARD. - OH, MY GOD.
- PUT THE SASH ON, GINA.
FIX IT, GINA, FIX THE SASH. - THANK YOU.
- THERE. TEMPORARY GARDENER.
ALL RIGHT, AND THERE'S YOUR GOLDEN HOE.
AND THE TWO OF YOU ARE NOT GOING HOME EMPTY-HANDED.
YOU'RE GONNA GET A $500 TARGET GIFT CARD
FOR BEING IN THE FINALS.
THIS IS GREAT. THANK YOU SO MUCH.