- Did you have grandparents, John?
- In a sense.
I mean, both of my parents had two parents, so yeah.
(chuckles) And then there was this guy, Paul.
- John, who's Paul?
- Well, Cordelia, sometimes elderly people go steady.
- They do?
- Yeah.
Funny, when I was a kid, I used to sing a song about Paul.
♪ Grandma's got a boyfriend ♪
(John hums melodically)
(cheery pop music)
♪ Grandma's got a boyfriend ♪
♪ It's a little weird at first ♪
♪ But then you say it twice ♪
♪ Grandma's got a boyfriend ♪
♪ And I think he's pretty nice ♪
♪ Grandma's got a boyfriend ♪
♪ And her boyfriend's name is Paul ♪
♪ Grandma's got a boyfriend ♪
♪ Everyone don't like him ♪
♪ He's almost 88 ♪
♪ My aunts say they don't trust him ♪
♪ But me, I think he's great ♪
♪ Grandma's boyfriend Paul ♪
♪ no they don't like Paul at all ♪
♪ Grandma's got a boyfriend ♪
♪ Why does everyone hate Paul ♪
♪ He ain't killed my grandpa ♪
♪ He don't do nothin' at all ♪
♪ He just reads his mysteries ♪
♪ Yeah, you can solve 'em, Paul ♪
♪ Grandma's boyfriend Paul ♪
♪ Grandma's got a boyfriend ♪
♪ I ask mom what's the fuss ♪
♪ Grandma's in love again ♪
♪ Mom said, but Paul ♪
♪ He's always hummin' Gilbert and Sullivan ♪
♪ That ain't fair to Paul ♪
♪ that he shouldn't hum at all ♪
♪ He also eats all the cashews ♪
♪ His son lives down in Maryland ♪
♪ I guess he lost his wife ♪
♪ I should ask, what's your story, man ♪
♪ I bet old Paul had quite a life ♪
♪ Grandma's boyfriend Paul ♪
♪ he calls waiters garcon ♪
(explosions cracking)
♪ The fella fought on D-Day ♪
♪ Grandma brought Paul to our cousin's christenin ♪
♪ She wore a brooch that grandpa gave ♪
♪ to her before he died ♪
♪ Well, my mom and aunts ♪
♪ Hell, they went crazy ♪
♪ They yelled about the brooch 'til grandma cried ♪
♪ Don't you make grandma cry ♪
♪ Paul, Lord, he tried to intervene ♪
♪ No, no, Paul, big mistake ♪
♪ I said, Paul, listen, this is not your fight ♪
♪ Stay out of it, Paul ♪
♪ These women would love a reason to destroy you ♪
♪ Easily provoked ♪
♪ They'll scream, "You're not our dad" at you all night ♪
♪ Oh, oh, oh ♪
♪ Mom, I know you miss your dad ♪
♪ Hell, I miss grandpa, too ♪
♪ But it ain't Paul's fault that he's gone ♪
♪ So what is wrong with you ♪
♪ Grandma's got a boyfriend ♪
♪ And her boyfriend's name is ♪
♪ Paul ♪
♪ Yeah ♪
♪ Grandma's got a boyfriend ♪
♪ I really like you, Paul ♪
♪ Grandma's got a boyfriend ♪
♪ I really like you, Paul ♪
♪ Hm-Hm-Hm-Hm-Hm-Hm-Hm-Hm-Hm-Hm-Hm-Hm-Hm-Hm hm hm ♪