- I didn't have a taquito until I got married.
(background laughter)
- That's what you call it.
- And I've never, I've never had a had a wagyu.
(upbeat music)
- Good mythical morning.
- Now Link, your palette has often been described as
a Harnett County pallette, right?
- By you.
Only, yes. By you.
- Yeah, right.
- I mean.
- That's true.
- I usually prefer the less highfalutin foods.
I'm like a low falutin food guy.
I mean,
I didn't eat guacamole or hummus or burritos
until I was in college.
- Oh, those sophisticated burritos.
(both laugh)
Okay, well.
Yeah, there's actually plenty of people out there
who have a much narrower palette than you,
- I just wasn't expect-
- 'cause you can eat a lot of things, man.
- Yeah, I've grown a lot.
- Yeah, well.
- I've benefited a lot.
- Well today is for those people,
like Link used to be,
with a slightly narrow palette
who delight in the simple snack,
but might want to expand their palette just a little bit.
- Yeah, yeah, I'm totally on board with this.
I'm a better person by eating other things,
including fancier things.
So the dishes that we're testing today
might do that for you.
- Right, so the question is,
can we endear average Joe eaters
to expensive top shelf ingredients?
And we're going to do that by
making junk food really fancy.
It's time for Top Shelf Snacks.
Okay, so we've got our average Rhett and Link hats on,
we've picked out some of our favorite
average Rhett and Link junk food from the grocery store.
Then the mythical kitchenniers have created
top shelf versions of that food by
making it with very expensive ingredients.
- Yes, what we're going to do is
we're going to try each dish side by side
with the real thing to see if the average Joe
would prefer the bougie version better,
or if nothing beats the OG junk.
In other words is this food
good for the average Joe
or a big ol' average no?
- Let's eat.
(upbeat music)
- What if El Monterey decided to make Wagyu taquito.
- Wagyu.
- I don't even know if that's how you say it, Waygu?
- Wagyu, I think it's Wagyu.
- These are the normal El Monterey taquitos.
And these are the ultra fancy versions with Wagyu beef.
- Now, a box of 21 El Monterey beef and cheese taquitos
costs $4 and 49 cents at Ralph's.
- Ooh.
- How many would 21 of these costs, or how much?
How many would they cost Josh?
- [VOICE] They would cost $75 and 45 cents.
- Dang, you got to put a taquito on a layaway plan.
- I think we've got to start with the
regulars every time, right?
- Yeah, yeah.
Now, I didn't, I didn't have a taquito until I got married.
- That's what you call it?
- And I've never,
I've never had a Wagyu.
- I've never had a Wagyu,
you've had a Wagyu.
- I couldn't tell what was happening.
- Man,
- That's good.
- Look at the way the wagyu peeks out at the end.
- [Link] What is Wagyu?
- [Rhett] The Wagyu.
- [VOICE] So, Wagyu is actually just the jacket.
It's the word for Japanese cow in Japanese.
But it typically refers to the style of cows that are raised
in Kobe, although those are regionally protected.
So the American style wagyu
has the DNA of the Japanese cow
crossbred with the American Angus.
So this is actually DNA tested, wagyu.
- I don't want to picture cows mating when I'm eating this.
- [VOICE] Oh, that's all I picture when I'm eating.
- Dude.
- This is really good until
he started talking about cow sex.
- It's so much better, oh.
- I don't care who you are
or how much you had to forfeit in order to get this.
It is,
It is so good.
So much better.
- I don't care how average your pallet is.
If you like this, you'll love this.
- And then you'll be able to say,
I wagyu it,
or something.
- I think we got to come up with
a new name other than Wagyu.
- Froo Froo beef.
- Don't pronounce the Y, wagu,
which I think is actually proper.
Is that right, Josh?
- Froo Froo wagyu beef.
- What do you say, wagu?
- [VOICE] Wagyu.
- Oh, wagyu.
- [VOICE] Kiko nodded his head because
it's Japanese and it's correct.
- I think we're just gonna say,
- I know what we're saying.
We're saying
- Wagyu. Wagyu.
- All we're really saying is
this is good for the average Joe,
you going to get fancy.
(upbeat music)
- When was the first time we ever had lobster.
- I think it's when we went to Maine in 2008,
- We were already like 30.
- I'd been married.
I've been married for eight years.
- Okay, well,
you're going to have it again today because-
- I would have had it earlier if it was in a hot pocket.
- This is a reg hot pocket and that's a lobster hot pocket.
Now 12 of these costs $9 and 62 cents at Walmart.
How many would a 12 pack of these costs?
I kept saying how many?
Like I'm talking like a child when it comes to money,
- You get, you're getting below average.
- How many dollars does it cost?
- [VOICE] $180 and 33 cents is many it would cost.
- So a little over $90 for 1 of these,
for 6 of these.
- [Stevie] So for a 12 pack,
- [VOICE] Why, not again!
- [Stevie] Are those hats doing something to you guys?
- Oh man.
First of all, just the outside is nice.
I'm going to just bite it, man.
- Look at that.
I'm a little nervous of this though.
This seems like a strange juxtaposition.
- There's nothing strange about it. Hmm.
- I've had a lobster roll.
I'm always disappointed in a lobster roll, but this,
this is better than a lobster roll.
- You were disappointed at my birthday party?
- In the lobster roll only.
Music was great.
- The lobster rolls were great!
- [Stevie] Lobster rolls are great!
- Yeah.
- [Stevie] You can have them with mayonnaise or you can
have them with hot butter and both ways are delicious.
- This is better than that.
- [Stevie] Well then save me half.
- It is, to me, this is better.
- It's not better than a lobster role.
It's more averaged.
- The price point.
I mean, if you get 12 for $180, I mean,
that means you're paying more than $10 for each one.
You're paying like
I don't know the math $12 at least. Right?
- [Stevie] Cheaper than a lobster all though.
- Exactly.
And that's what's happening here is that we're like,
hey you ever had a lobster? You ever had a lobster?
No, I don't eat lobster rolls.
- Tastes like a crustacean.
It's like an insect of the sea.
- But, but it's in a hot pocket.
- Really?
- Yeah.
First one's free.
- How much?
- First one's free, and you're going pay out the nose
for the rest, but you'll be hooked.
- Here's the thing.
Every time in my life,
anyone has told me that it's gotten me into a lot of
trouble.
- Right. But you can't resist can you?.
- I don't know. I agree.
I do think this is really, really good.
If you take the price point out.
If the first one is free, then I think this is easy.
I mean, yeah, this is good for the average, Joe.
- [Link] Yeah.
- [Rhett] First one's free.
(upbeat trumpet sound)
- You see how Josh is just bringing us things that are
weird and delicious?
Well, you can actually see him
make the things that are weird and delicious over on the
mythical kitchen You Tube channel.
- [Link] Whole other channel!
- And then, you know what,
there's not just YouTube channel.
They also have a podcast called a Hotdog is a Sandwich.
Where Josh and Nicole this week are debating,
which is better canned or tap soda.
I mean these are the things that you want to know.
- I don't really even know what tap soda is.
I am so average.
- Yeah. You know, from the fountain.
- Alright. What if Funyuns decided to make truffle Funyuns?
They'd probably call them truffle Funyuns.
- Right.
- They probably wouldn't.
They probably call them something else.
If they're good, we'll rename them.
- Okay. Now everybody knows a regular old Funyuns is good.
And it costs $3 and 99 cents a Kroger for a 6 ounce bag.
How much would 6 ounces of these costs, Mitch?
- [VOICE] It'd be 25.99, which to me is a steal.
- Oh.
- 26, I'm not fooled, that's $26.
- But how many would it cost?
- [VOICE] About the same ish? I think.
- You know, the first time I ate a Funyun and just to,
just to turn everything on its head here.
- When you were two, when you were a baby.
- I think last year.
- Oh gosh.
- I never, I mean, I think it was on this show.
It was the first time I ever ate a Funyun.
- You've been afraid of Funyuns.
- I mean, it's like, why would I want an onion?
- That's fun. Why would you not?
- It's like, there's so many other funner snacks than to
have to go to an onion.
- I don't, I mean I.
- I never tried one.
- Here's the thing.
There's a lot of things in my life that I've had that I did
not seek out.
Like when you say I'd never had a Funyun, and I'm like,
well, I never sought out a Funyun,
but somehow they just ended up in my mouth.
(gasp)
I think that's the case with most people.
- Try that.
- Gracious that's strong.
Truffle is strong
- Truffle love.
- In general.
- Why? Why is a truffle so strong tasting?
- Because it's expensive.
- [VOICE] That's like the reason it exists.
- Because it exists.
- [VOICE] Yeah, it's kind of existential.
- Whoa.
That's good, man.
- I think you got it call it something else besides truffle.
- Ruffle.
- Sike.
- Trouble.
You say trouble.
- Trouble dust.
- Do you want to get you into some trouble with your
Funyuns?
- Trouble dusted Funyuns.
- Did you say truffle, did you say trouble?
Because I'm down with trouble.
- I think, I think that really will do it.
Trouble dusted Funyuns.
- How much is a bag? $25.
What? Is the first one free.
- And then, and then afterward, you're like, you know,
if it's really just a truffle, you mean that thing?
That a pig snuffles up.
- Here's where I'll say.
A lot of times truffle oil on things
will completely overpower a dish.
And even at like a lot of fancy places have truffle fries.
I usually don't get them because I feel like it just does
something that I don't want done to my taters.
But something-
- Like a garlic fry.
- No, garlic fries are good.
I'm saying sometimes truffles too strong,
But I thought this was going to be an easy no
for the average Joe, but having tasted them,
they're way more fun than Funyuns.
- Yeah, a little marketing.
You make it edgy.
Good for the average Joe.
- [Rhett] Trouble dusted.
(upbeat trumpet playing)
- I'm told that there is a spice so expensive that by weight
it's actually worth more than gold.
- And what is that spice?
- I'm told that it's saffron.
- Okay, yes.
We have saffron Twinkies.
Now, I got reg Twinkies over here.
10 Twinkies, 2.99 at Target.
How many-
- You know, the first time I ate a Twinkie?
- Would the saffron ones cost?
- On this show.
- [VOICE] $49 and 50 cents.
- Good god.
- Okay. So, okay.
So 50 bucks.
Now there's more than saffron happened in all these,
right?
What else is happening?
- [VOICE] There is.
We did a little creme fresh and white chocolate ganache
instead of your standard cream filling.
- Well I'll tell you,
this standard cream filling is making me happy.
- You ever done that before and take a bite out of
the middle and put it back together and you,
and you give that to your kids.
- Oh wow.
It's a fun size.
You shouldn't have told me that.
- Hey look I got y'all some Twinkies!
- Cause, cause if you don't do that,
what are you supposed to do?
Just like, like nibble it.
I'm like, oh, there's another fun size here for you.
- No, that doesn't work.
No, you gotta do what I did.
You got to keep the cream on the inside.
They'll fall for that until they're about four.
- So let's take a look at, ooh, look at that,
I'm double barrelling it.
- Now, I'm not a huge saffron fan.
Okay.
I'm going to say that I've had saffron ruin too many nights.
- Is that what the orange specks are?
- [VOICE] Yeah saffron turns to like a nice golden color.
- So the color of these Twinkies
is more pleasing.
It pops a lot more.
This is what a regular Twinkie on the box looks like.
So we're finally meeting expectations, but the taste?
- I think saffron tastes like you might've gotten into
like a pool filter.
You know what I'm saying? Like.
- Yeah, just like lapped it up.
- Like would you like me to take the pool filter and
dip your Twinkie in it?
Like, I hate to say that Josh, but you know,
compliments to the chef for everything except a saffron.
- That's bad.
That is bad.
- I just don't like the flavor of it.
I don't understand why it's so expensive.
It's like one of the biggest hoodwinks of mankind.
- It's how they harvest it, Rhett.
That's why it costs so much.
You've got to, you've got to,
you've got to summon a demon and then pay him off.
It's a demon summoned black market spice.
- Well I mean you're really trying to sell it.
It's not working for me because it tastes like a pool
filter.
- It tastes horrible.
- And one time I got the pool filter.
Well, one time I got something stuck in the pool filter
and talk about a long weekend.
(laughing)
- Just because your palace average does
not mean that you are not smart.
- Right?
- And if you eat this,
you are going to know that it sucks because you're smart.
And average, like me.
- So what we're saying is that of everything that we've
tasted just the saffron Twinkies get a big old average
no!
But you know what?
We learned some things because some things were good.
In fact-
- Most everything was good.
- Most everything except the Saffron.
- I mean, we're like freaking palette expanders.
Way to go, Josh.
- [VOICE] Way to go you too.
- We're pallet expanders.
That's like something that you get in the dentist.
- Thanks for subscribing and clicking that bell.
- You know what time it is.
- I'm Molly.
- And Molly's mom.
- We're from Texas,
but we're in Disney World right now at Villains After Hours.
- And it's time to spend the Wheel of Mythicality.
- Dang I thought y'all were sisters!
- Oh the timing, the timing of that, did they, how did they,
how long did they plan that?
- What?
- The timing of the music.
It was beautiful.
(retro music begins)
You know what?
We're going to try some chicken chips and good mythical
more stick around.
- We got a bag of chicken chips.
And if I know where the Wheel of Mythicality,
ISS going to land.
- it's like a freaking Turkey.
Like you'd get at a Renaissance fair except this is an
ostrich, this is a dinosaur Turkey,
like is what the T-rexes were eating at the Ren fair.