Hello, everyone.
Whether you're a spiritual connoisseur,
a self-help junkie,
or someone who just wants a different perspective,
chances are, you love the idea of self-improvement.
But why does self-improvement not work?
I'm here to tell you why.
The reason is that so many self-help techniques
put you at war with yourself.
They pit one aspect of you against another aspect of yourself.
To wage war with yourself, is to promote self hate.
When we suppress our emotions,
which all of us must do
at one point or another in our early lives,
those suppressed emotions become part of our personality.
Another way of saying this is,
our problems become part of our personality.
And as soon as they become part of our personality,
they become part of our identity.
You see them as yourself,
and resisting any aspect of yourself, is asking for emotional disaster.
It is self-hate.
Regardless of whether you resist something positive within yourself,
or negative within yourself,
it is self-hate
and therefore it is self-destruction.
So what is the solution?
The solution is exaltation.
Exaltation is an old alchemy concept.
It means to take something
and to transform it into the highest spiritual aspect of itself.
So for example, for the old alchemists,
the highest form of metal is gold.
If we want to live better lives
where we are not continually made unhappy
by our negative personality traits,
we must first recognize those negative personality traits,
and find a way to accept them and approve of those traits,
and then, find a way to amplify those traits,
by allowing those traits to express themselves
in their highest manner.
In alignment with the highest and best use of those very same traits.
We must exalt those very negative traits,
which we think are negative,
into the positive use of those "negative" traits.
Here's an example of exaltation.
Let's say I felt unloved as a child
and was punished for trying to get the love I needed.
I may have suppressed those feelings of resentment and powerlessness.
Over the years,
the powerlessness and resentment has become part of my personality.
It has caused me to exhibit certain behaviors.
It has caused me to be an energy vampire.
Because I believe I am not allowed to ask for the things I need,
I manipulate people so I can get the energy I want from them.
This personality trait is so much a part of me,
that one could say it's part of my personality.
I cannot overcome this problem,
and I cannot eradicate it from my personality.
It is part of who I am now.
So my only choice is to take that negative personality trait
and make that same personality trait into something positive.
Because I am an energy vampire,
I am a master at manipulating energy.
I could become a brilliant energy worker.
I have the capability of consciously pulling in negative energy
and transmuting it inside my body,
so I can feed off of illness and discord in energy,
rather than stealing life force from people's bodies.
I can manipulate energy to heal people.
Also, as an energy vampire,
I am a master at Mental Chess.
I play mind games with people.
So the highest aspect of that trait,
is to play mind games with people
that benefit them.
I could become a brilliant counselor or psychologist.
I could outsmart people's egos
and help them to see things about themselves
that they are totally unaware of.
Have you ever noticed that you can't overcome your problems
no matter how hard you try?
It's because you can't overcome something that is part of you.
To try to overcome something that's part of you,
is resistance to part of you.
It is an internal war.
As soon as you identify with something,
that something is you.
And you can't be against that something,
without now being against yourself.
Now if you want to talk the very opposite of self-help,
you can talk about waging war with yourself.
There is no greater example of waging war with yourself,
than trying to overcome
one of your problems or personality traits.
Negative traits which are part of you
can never be eradicated from you.
They can only be transformed into their highest aspect.
So describe yourself.
What problems do you have?
What do you feel are the negative parts of your personality?
Be very honest about the traits that you don't like about yourself.
But then, I want you to spend some time thinking about
what the highest exalted state
of those very same negative behaviors or personality traits could be.
I am dark.
Perhaps the exalted form of being dark
is that I'm a brilliant shadow worker.
I'm a seasoned veteran
when it comes to exploring the subconscious
and the parts of people that people fear,
the parts they're trying to avoid.
So I can allow people
to use me as a guide
to exploring the darker aspects of their consciousness.
I can allow them to take the light of consciousness
into the shadows that they're afraid of going into,
and especially afraid of going into alone.
Also, dark energy is powerfully captivating
because it frightens people.
So instead of trying to become lighter and lighter,
I can embrace that Dark energy,
and allow myself to captivate people's attention
and break them out of the monotony.
Maybe I am anxious.
The exalted form of being anxious could be that I am sensitive.
I am sensitive to the energies around me.
I could be a talented interior decorator
because I can feel the way that energy moves around a room.
I am sensitive to the placement of objects
and the influence that colors have on our emotions.
I could design homes for people
that made them feel exactly how they want to feel
upon coming home.
Maybe I'm a bully.
Bullies push people.
The exalted form of being a bully
could be that I push people to be their best.
I embrace my forceful energy
and use it in situations where people could benefit by that force.
Such as when someone needs especially strong encouragement.
Bullies establish dominance within a social group.
The exalted version of this is leadership.
I embrace my leadership ability
and take charge when other people feel as if they need direction.
I take initiative.
I can rally people up into cooperating with one another.
Exalting your negative personality traits and problems
is not about going to war with yourself.
I promise you it is counterproductive
to try to rid yourself
of any aspect of yourself that you identify with.
This is to wage war with yourself.
And you can't do that
and live a happy life at the same time.
Whenever you are trying to change an aspect of yourself
that you don't like,
you are in resistance to yourself.
And whatever you resist persists.
So the best way to deal with this,
is not to resist any aspect of yourself,
not to try to get rid of part of your personality
or a trait of yourself that you don't like.
The best way to deal with this,
is to find a way to fall in love with what you hate about yourself.
Find a way to turn metal into gold
on an internal level.
I promise you that this will improve your life immensely.
When it comes to self-help,
nothing can help you as much as embracing who you really are.
Which is the opposite of what most of us are trying to do
if we are in the self-help industry or if we're addicted to self-help.
What we've been spending our lives doing
is trying to turn ourselves into something and someone else.
Have a good week.
Subtitles by: Tanya Duarte