A: I have an announcement. I&G: What?
A: I've started cooking. I buy this cold brew, and then I turn it into coffee.
I: That's not cooking. G: That's not cooking, Allison.
A: Yes, because it's many steps. I: No, at most it's mixing.
G: You can't just drink this?
A: I mean- whoa, what do you want to do, get addicted to crack cocaine?
(jazzy music)
A (singing): This week- A&I (singing): -we have an international
A&I (singing): question, international question, international question
I (wavering): From Montaña. I realized it was international and Montana's a state.
I: From- You didn't tell me the place. A: Yeah, so don't go singing my song if
A: you're not prepared. G: Are you- Is this so that you don't get
G: deported? I (laughing): Yes!
G: Once again, Igor is just reminding everyone, please don't send him back to
G: Russia. A: Technically-
G: When did you become a citizen? I: I became a citizen when I was eleven.
G: Okay. A: It took that long?
I: Ten years! Yeah. A: Wow.
I: But anyone can- G: Right, exactly. They're not letting
G: anyone in, you know what I mean. A: Anyway, back to something more
A: important. Clark, non-conforming, 17, in Paris-
G: Oh, I love that! I: Ohh, whoa.
A: Very cool. G: Oh my god, awesome.
A:-wants to know, how do you make a move when you have anxiety?
A: I though this could be a fun opportunity-
I: For an act-out? A: For an act-out.
G: But you- you have to act it out. I: Yeah, you're the-
G: You're the one that's anxious. I: You're the person with anxiety.
A: No, I'm fine. G: You're cured?
A: I'm on the up and up. G: I have anxiety when I hit on women, a
G: lot of the time. And it manifests in talking too much. So like, if I'm flirting
G: with a girl, I'm like- I hear myself in my head going, "You're still- you're still
G: talking. Stop, stop." A: But I hear that all the time. Are you
A: still hitting on me? G: I think women also are- do a thing
G: where they, like, let- It's almost like the cops, where they, like, let you keep
G: talking until you, like, back yourself into some sort of corner.
A: I think we should now see you try to make a move on Igor.
G: How would I make a move on Igor? A: Yeah, when you're- when you're riddled
A: with anxiety. G: Okay.
A: Let me set the mood. G: Okay, set the mood.
I: Please. G: She's not going to like what's about to
G: happen. Set the mood. A: Set the mood. So, Igor recently moved
A: into a new place. He's decorated it well, he's invited a bunch of people over
A: to have some sort of standing dinner party because he doesn't have a big enough
A: table. Everyone is milling around, having hors d'oeurves, having a great
A: time. They start to filter out because it wasn't that fun. Gaby remains behind.
A: It's suddenly- I: It wasn't that fun?
A: -just the two of them. G: Uh-huh.
A: She's been getting it in her mind that she's finally going to make a move after
A: Igor's dinner party. Scene. G: That was a really great dinner party.
I: Right? All the milk we wanted. G: So, I'm the only one still here.
I: I- yeah, I noticed that. G: Is that okay?
I: It's- yeah, it's okay. A: You seem too confident to be riddled
A: with anxiety. G: It's in my heart.
A: I think you should show it more. G: Okay, so just to be clear, I'm anxious.
A: Very anxious. G: What do I do to assuage my anxious
G: feelings? A: Yeah.
G: Here's how you eliminate the anxiety. A: (screams) Ew! Ew.
G: I told you weren't gonna like it. I: That's-
A: That was so gross. I heard the sucking sounds.
G: You eliminate the anxiety by eliminating the tension.
I: Good party. I think there is a great lesson here, though, which is act as if.
I: And this is a real thing. Tom Hanks told this to Conan O'Brien when he first
I: starting hosting the show. He was really nervous. He goes, "How do I do
I: this, I'm so nervous," and Tom Hanks said, "Act as if you are a confident talk
I: show host." And this is a good- G: So act as if-
A: If you are around someone, and you like them and you want to make a move, act as
A: though you are a confident talk show host.
A: Okay, so now, Igor, I'm going to give you a scenario.
I: Okay. Am I anxious now? A: Yeah, now you're really anxious, okay?
I: Okay. A: So, I'm in the hospital. I was in a car
A: crash. I: Oh my god.
A: The waiting room is packed with my loved ones and family but you- cuz you
A: know, people really care and they showed up. You and Gaby-
I: There are hors d'oeurves A:- go to get snacks at the vending
A: machine. It's a deserted hallway. You think, "Maybe now that Allison's probably
A: gonna die, I should make a move on Gaby." G: And we're emotional about it.
A: And you're emotional and you're anxious, so just act that out.
I: What kind of an asshole am I? G: Oh, A7. I got a Twix bar.
I: Oh, that'll be- I can barely eat. I'm- G: You're so sad about Allison?
I: I'm so sad. Are you doing okay? G: I'm great. I'm gonna get another thing.
G: Beep boop. KitKat. I: Oh, you've got- you have such a good
I: appetite. G: I like to get-
A: You don't seem anxious or sad. I: Well, oh my god, I'm getting there, I'm
I: getting there. Uh, poor Allison. G: Do you think she can hear if we talk to
G: her in her coma? I: I don't know, but do you think she can
I: feel? A: Beep beep beep beeeeeeeeee
A: I'm dying and you kept kissing? G: Did our kiss kill you?
A: I died! I think neither of you did a good job.
(jazzy music)
I: Do you wanna act it out? A: No.
G: You sure? You don't want to get in on this? (kissing noises)
A: I'm good. I: (kissing noises)
A: My anxiety is that you two will make a move on me.
Subtitles by the Amara.org community