And now, one of my favorite segments on this show is Why I Don't Have Kids,
where I show adorable kids doing terrible things.
And it got me thinking I could do similar segment about a different topic.
How many of you here have husbands?
All right.
Great. All right. I love husbands.
I do. I love them.
They're handsome.
They're funny.
I just don't want one of my own,and here are some reasons why in my brand new
segment, Why I don't have a husband.
All right.
Here's the first one.
So that takes a steady hand and no steady job, I think.
Waw!
Here's the second one.
>> [LAUGH] >> So
he's got a video game control in both hands, a plate of Cheetos on his chest.
And they say women are the multitaskers, come on.
Men are multitaskers too.
Here's another one.
>> [LAUGH] >> Look Ma, no hands.
Also no girlfriend, and no job, and no feeling.
[LAUGH] In my lips.
Here's another one.
[LAUGH] Well.
It's the old saying, I want a man in the streets and a cartoonist in the sheets.
>> [LAUGH] >> Not only do I have photos,
I also have a video.
>> [SCREAMING] >> The white rhino charges.
>> The white rhino charging into the [INAUDIBLE].
>> [LAUGH] >> [APPLAUSE] He
seems like a gentle lover.
[LAUGH] Now the guy eating
Cheetos off
his chest seems like a real catch doesn't he?
[LAUGH] If your husband does something you think I should see, please send it to me.