- All right. Welcome in everybody.
Who here's new to Home House Church?
Show your hands.
One, two.
Wow, looks like we got a lot of virgins in the building.
(laughs) I'm just kidding.
We should all be virgins.
(energetic music begins)
Guys, make yourself at home.
Grab a Sprite.
Scan the QR code for tonight's scripture.
It's about to get holy in here.
Oh, here comes Kevin with that big faith energy!
Guys, I hope you brought your sins with you,
'cause you will not be leaving with them. (chuckles)
Let's pray!
So for those of you who are new, okay?
I'm Pastor Garrett,
but you can call me Gar
or Gar Bear or Brother Gar
or Gummy or Gummy Tummy
or sometimes Gummy Tummy, the Lord is coming.
Hey Charlie, Charlie!
Sick shoes, man.
Those are awesome!
The other week somebody asked me,
"Gummy Tummy, if the Lord's real,
why can't I see Him?" (scoffs)
The wind is real and you can't see that.
Other things you can't see that are real.
Cancer, naked eye,
you can't see it unless it's really, really bad.
Have you prayed today?!
Wi-Fi.
5G.
God is a lot like the internet,
because He is everywhere.
Have you prayed today?!
You should be praying three times a day.
Once to start the day,
second just in case you mess somethin' up
and the third is before you go to sleep,
but after you brush your teeth,
so you have good breath for God.
Ahh!
Sorry, just had to make sure none of you were vampires.
All right, everybody put on your blindfolds.
We're gonna wander into the forest
and listen for God.
I'll get my guitar.
Oh, and if you get lost,
like we do on this Earth.
Don't worry. Just listen.
And you'll hear me strumming around.
(guitar strums)
I actually don't know how to play guitar
but I just let God move through me.
Sometimes He plays some bangers.
(guitar strums)
(inhales and exhales deeply)
(chuckles gently)
Sorry. I just love basking in His light.
God is turnt today.
We should try to go to Antarctica!
We haven't even tried that!
God, probably so many people there
who haven't even heard of this gospel yet.
Does anybody know?
(all laughing)
God is like this skateboard.
He moves us and He lifts us up sometimes,
if it's a sick ollie or two.
(skateboard thuds)
That was God, guys!
He did that.
God helps you shred at life.
Guys, you know what we should do?
We should get together
and make a holy TikTok.
Battles for the Lord's word.
♪ God is li-fe ♪
♪ Baby will you come to church and know-he ♪
♪ Come and feel what the Christ ♪
♪ The word of Christ is like. ♪
Yo, hacky sack?
Okay, okay. Pass it over here, let's go!
It's all right. It's all right, okay.
When I die,
I'm gonna shoot up to heaven like Superman.
Ahh!
Just bliss, ascending and bliss.
This hacky sack is sin.
You don't want it to stick to your foot.
You just wanna kick it away, like this.
And then it's kicked away.
It's the salvation for me.
It's giving Christ.
It's giving forgiveness.
♪ Trying to feel with the Christ ♪
♪ Yes He is alive ♪
Well He was,
then He died.
Then He came back three days later
out of that little rock room.
(all laughing)
When you go to heaven,
they say that you are perfect prime,
25 years old,
just hot as hell.
That's what makes it heaven,
everyone's freaking, ah!
Not me sinning on the Lord's day.
Not me forgetting to fast on Fast Sunday.
(exhales) So last night I was playing Fortnite
with my four sons, all named Isaiah,
and I realized something really important.
We all deserve a victory royal
for Christ.
Big Christ energy!
My favorite album?
The 10 Commandments.
Well guys, why don't we head in
for some cinnamon rolls, huh?
(screen beeps)
Clap with me!
♪ What is li-fe ♪
♪ Baby will you come to church and know-he ♪
♪ I identify with Christ ♪
♪ Christ He is alive ♪
He's not,
but He was
and then He died,
and then three days later,
He came back.
And then I dunno, actually.
Oh, let me fact check.
He lived the rest of his,
He died when he was 30?
I dunno.
(all laughing)